Murder, She Wrote S1 E5: Lovers and Other Killers (1984)

While in Seattle for a series of lectures, Jessica meets a young male secretary accused of killing his wealthy older friend.

Season 1, Episode 5: Lover’s and Other Killers (November 18, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

Jessica goes to Seattle, and the show is being shot on location.

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Lansbury, and were they in any exploitation movies?

Jack Schroeder is played by Grant Goodeve, who mainly works as a voice-over artist today. You might know him from Eight Is Enough.

Dr. Edmund Gerard is Peter Graves, James Phelps from Mission: Impossible and the brother of James Arness. You may also recognize him from Airplane! and tons of TV movies, like The Memory of Eva RykerDeath On the Freeway and Scream of the Wolf.

Lt. Andrews? That’s Greg Morris, who was Barney Collier alongside Graves on Mission: Impossible

Amelia is Lois Nettleton, Sister Marion from Mirror, Mirror II: Raven Dance, and Joanne St. John in 22 episodes of In the Heat of the Night.

Professor Todd Lowery is, of course, Andrew Prine, whose grindhouse resume is perfect. EliminatorsAmityville II: The PossessionThe EvilThe Town That Dreaded SundownGrizzlySimon King of the Witches and so many more.

David Tolliver, who is accused of murder, is played by Andrew Stevens, who six years after this would change the direct-to-video and late night cable world with Night Eyes.

Lila Schroeder is played by Lory Walsh, who was a guest star on many TV shows in the late 1970s and early 1980s before dying young. She was also in the band The Fauves.

David J. Goldfarb and Dean Rubin, who was a featured skater in Skatetown U.S.A. and a featured dancer in Xanadu, play the small roles.

What happens?

Edmund Gerard invites Jessica to Seattle to lecture at Sequoia University. This episode mentions one of her books that we’ve already heard about, her first book, The Corpse Danced at Midnight. Before all that, Allison Brevard was strangled in her home in a scene that totally looks like a Giallo. We should also know that Edmund and Lila, a teaching assistant, are sleeping with each other.

Edmund is also friends with Frank, Jessica’s husband.

Meanwhile, Jessica hires David Tolliver as her secretary, just in time for her to be accused of the murder of Allison. This episode doubles up the murder, because Lila tries to tell Jessica a secret, only to be killed as well.

So: Lila was sleeping with Edmund and David, but is still married to Jack, who is quite jealous. It seems that he should be. As for the teacher that Jessica is lecturing for, Professor Lowery, she starts to believe that he’s the killer.

Unlike so many episodes of this show, in which Jessica isn’t ever in real danger, this one has her get pushed down the steps when she comes back to the college to talk things over with the professor. Everything seems to set up David as the killer, but that would be too simple.

Who did it?

Amelia.

Who made it?

Director Allen Reisner made four episodes of Murder, She Wrote, and so many other shows, including Future CopNight Gallery (“The Nature of the Enemy” and “Brenda“), Lancer and The Green Hornet. Wonder if he ever met Rick Dalton?

One of the show’s creators, Peter S. Fischer, wrote it.

Some facts…

The title of this episode is a reference to the 1970 movie Lovers and Other Strangers.

This may have been the second pilot and the first regular series episode to be filmed.

The actress playing Allison Brevard, the first victim, is not credited.

Does Jessica get some?

Nope. I was ready for her to hook up with Peter Graves, but he was into young women.

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

No, but the gun scene in the credits is from this episode.

Was it any good?

This episode covers all the bases of the show, except that Jessica doesn’t know how not to do disguise yet.

Give me a reasonable quote:

Jessica: Now, Elizabeth Taylor. Now, that is famous. I still have to take a number at Cooper’s Bakery, which is the same as ever.

What’s next?

A car with no driver kills an inventor. Can Jessica figure that out?

Murder, She Wrote S1 E4: It’s a Dog’s Life (1984)

Jessica can’t even go to a polo match without family in-fighting and murder, as Denton Langley falls off his horse and dies. His dog, Teddy, gets the whole estate. But is the pup a murderer?

Season 1, Episode 4: It’s a Dog’s Life (November 4, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

Rich people, trained animals and, as always, murder.

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Lansbury, and were they in any exploitation movies?

Denton Langley, whose death sets all of this off, is played by Dan O’Herlihy, who has been in everything from Luis Buñuel’s Robinson Crusoe to Imitation of LifeFail Safe and The Tamarind Seed. But for us, he’s best known as “The Old Man” in RoboCop, Grig in The Last Starfighter and Conal Cochran in
Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

Marcus Boswell is played by Dean Jones. Once, I wrote about how much I hated Jones in Disney movies because he’s always in a bad mood. I hate to bring it up now and get more hate mail. He’s also in Antonio Margheriti’s Mr. Superinvisible, which was distributed by K-Tel.

Morgana Cramer is Cathryn Damon, who you may remember from Webster and Soap. She’s also in the 1981 made-for-TV Satanic shocker Midnight Offerings.

Lenore Kasdorf plays Trish Langley. She’s also Rico’s mom in Starship Troopers and appears in Amityville Dollhouse and Missing In Action.

Spencer Langley is Jared Martin, who is in a ton of movies that I love, including Twin SittersAenigmaKarate WarriorThe Sea Serpent and Warriors of the Year 2072. And how could I forget — The Lonely Lady.

The Sheriff is Roger Miller, who sang “Dang Me,” “Do-Wacka-Do,” “Chug-A-Lug,” “Little Green Apples” and, you knew it, “King of the Road.”

Abby Benton Freestone, who is Jessica’s friend in this, is Lynn Redgrave, who was a serious actress and well above most of the movies I like. Except, you know, movies like MidnightThe Happy Hooker and Disco Beaver from Outer Space.

Forrest Tucker is Tom Cassidy, and man, his IMDB is like my heaven: the Klaus Kinski TV movie TimestalkersThe Crawling EyeThe Abominable Snowman, and two guest spots on Flo.

Isiah Potts is Gregory Walcott, who, of course, is Jeff Trent from Plan 9 From Outer Space.

Echo Cramer is actually Cherie Curie! Formerly of The Runaways, she was also in WavelengthParasiteFoxes and Twilight Zone: The Movie.

Small parts include Byron Cherry (who ruined many a child’s 1982-1983 TV season when he was Coy Duke and replaced the Duke boys with his other cousin Vance for 19 episodes), James Hampton (Uncle Howard from the Teen Wolf movies), Sandy Ward (Bette Midler’s dad in The Rose), Robert Cornthwaite (seemingly typecast as a doctor in movies like Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?The Primevals, the original The ThingMant! within MatineeThe War of the Worlds and Time Trackers. This too, because he’s the coroner), Donna Anderson (Count Yorga), Greg Norberg (who produced Hot Shots!) Bernard McDonald and Brian Mozur.

What happens?

Jess’ cousin Abby is the horse trainer for rich guy Denton Langley. He is celebrating his 80th birthday with a fox hunt, which turns into a hunt for something else once he gets a look at Jessica. His family is pretty much the absolute worst, and soon, the fox hunt claims his life when his horse jumps too high and he’s thrown.

“Push, Teddy! Push!” I have screamed this in Lynn Redgrave’s voice so many times. This episode features a trained dog who is the highlight.

Soon, a VHS will reveals that all $3 million of the estate will go to the dog. Jessica wants to leave, but her cousin begs her to stay. Everyone is after Teddy, but all the money goes to an animal charity if he dies. But that night, Trish, the drunken daughter, comes home late and gets out of her car when the gate doesn’t work right. Then, the gate comes crashing down on her head, killing her and Teddy is revealed as the culprit! Could this dog, trained by Abby, be the killer?

Who did it?

Trish killed her father, but when she wouldn’t split the money with Marcus the lawyer, he had her killed and set up Teddy.

Who made it?

Director Seymour Robbie was a busy TV director—he directed 21 episodes of this show, 17 of Remington Steele, 3 of the Father Dowling Mysteries, 3 of Hart to Hart, and the Desi Arnez Jr. movie Marco and C.C. and  Company.

It was written by Mark Giles and Linda Shank, who wrote “Sticks and Stones” in season 2.

A fact…

Forrest Tucker and James Hampton were on F Troop together. This was Tucker’s last role.

Does Jessica get some?

No, but if that guy hadn’t died…

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

No. Trust me, you’ll get sick of it soon.

Was it any good?

This is one of my favorite episodes because of Teddy.

Give me a reasonable quote:

Marcus Boswell: Let me tell you something, Spencer. You are talking about a perfectly normal dog as if he’s possessed! You’ve been seeing too many Stephen King movies.

Got a TV Guide ad?

No, but how about a picture of Teddy?

What’s next?

Jessica goes to Seattle for a lecture and, surprise, someone dies.

VISUAL VENGEANCE BLU RAY RELEASE: Furious (1984)

Simon (Simon Rhee) wants to know why his sister was killed. This brings him into a war of fists and feet with Master Chan (Phillip Rhee), a sorcerer who has been after the ancient amulet shared by Simon and his sibling  (Arlene Montano).

This is a very simple opening paragraph that doesn’t hint at how absolutely insane this movie is. Shot in six days with no script — “Filmed Entirely on Location in Southern California” — this was directed and written by Tim Everitt and Tom Sartori, who made it with exactly thirty grand. It was probably the best money spent ever.

If you saw the cover art for this, you may expect your everyday kung fu movie. You would not be prepared for magic users who shoot chickens out of their hands. Or aliens. Or flying martial arts. Or a band resembling Devo, the clone army that fuels the evil empire. Or Susanna Hoffs (maybe, supposedly).

Simon and Phillip Rhee went on to appear in many fight scenes, but here, they had all the freedom to do whatever they wanted. They also brought their students on to punch and kick one another for less than a week. They’re not just guys off the streets. These are trained professionals ready to elevate the fight scenes in this to art, even if the budget is less than almost any movie you can find.

This is the kind of movie that has talking dogs and chickens and it’s nearly an afterthought because there’s also a fire-breathing dragon. Most movies would be satisfied with one of these things and have all the money to fully realize all of these many moments, but Furious doesn’t care. I wish that more filmmakers today didn’t care this much, that they would use the cameras in their phones and all the technology at their disposal and make something 5% as cool as this, because this is 200% better than any fighting movie you’ll watch in 4 years. Don’t make me do math.

The Visual Vengeance release is perfect, and I’m in awe of the extras Justin Decloux created for it. He’s sent me down a rabbit hole filled with American chop sockery, and for that, I can only say thank you.

This cult martial arts classic is available for the first time ever on Blu-ray with hours of new interviews and bonus features:

  • Limited Edition slipcase by The Dude and a limited edition throwing star key tag
  • New director-approved SD master from original tape elements
  • Archival commentary with co-director Tim Everitt
  • Commentary with Justin Decloux of The Important Cinema Club and Peter Kuplowsky of the Toronto International Film Festival
  • High Kicking In Hollywood: Tom Sartori interview
  • The Kung Fu Kid: Tim Everitt interview
  • North American No-Budget Martial Arts Cinema Primer – video essay by Justin Decloux
  • Rhee Brothers Career Overview – Justin Decloux video essay
  • Archival Scarecrow Video Podcast with Tim Everitt (2013)
  • Furious New Wave Band – behind the scenes Super 8 footage
  • Scorched Earth Policy: full six song EP (1987)
  • Cinema Face: live in concert (1986)
  • Tom Sartori 1980s music video reel
  • Tom Sartori Super 8 short films reel
  • Original trailers
  • Visual Vengeance trailers
  • “Stick Your Own” VHS sticker set
  • Reversible sleeve featuring original VHS art
  • Folded mini-poster reproduction of original Furious one sheet
  • 2-sided insert with alternate art

You can get this from MVD.

Murder, She Wrote S1 E3: Hooray for Homicide (1984)

I always wonder when people are going to start blaming Jessica Fletcher for all these murders. By the third regular episode of the series, it happens. When she protests when her book is turned into a slasher movie, Jessica winds up as the prime suspect when the producer is killed.

Season 1, Episode 3: Hooray for Homicide (October 28, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

One of Jessica’s books is becoming a movie, and she’s not happy about it.

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Lansbury and were they in any exploitation movies?

Claude Atkins returns as local lawman Captain Ethan Cragg.

Crystal is played by Melissa Sue Anderson, who, by 1984, knew all about slashers after appearing in Happy Birthday to Me. She’s probably best known for playing Mary Ingalls on Little House on the Prairie.

Ross is John Astin, once Gomez Adams and also someone who moved into directing, creating episodes of Night GalleryCHiPS and, yes, Murder, She Wrote.

Marta is Samantha Eggar, who I have discussed so many times that I worry that she may take out a restraining order on me. In case you want to get obsessed, she’s in The Brood and Demonoid.

Allan is James MacArthur, Danny Williams from Hawaii-Five-O.

Elinor is Virginia Mayo, who was a major star in the 1950s, but people like would know her from Won Ton Ton: The Dog Who Saved HollywoodHauntedCastle of Evil and Evil Spirits.

Norman Lester, Esq. is played by Ron Pallilo, who was Arnold Horshack and also appears in Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives, Skatetown U.S.A. and Snake Eater.

This episode’s cop, Lt. Mike Hernandez, is José Pérez from Short Eyes.

The murdered filmmaker is Jerry Lydecker, who is John Saxon. If you’re reading this site, you know who he is. And if you don’t, man, you have so many great films to watch.

Scott plays Morgan Stevens, the first of three roles on this show. Most people remember him as David Reardon on Fame.

Marty is Lyle Waggoner, Steve Trevor on TV’s Wonder Woman, a Carol Burnett cast member, and someone who was in movies like Surf IIWizards of the Demon SwordDream a Little Evil and Love Me Deadly. He would be in two more Murder, She Wrote shows.

Sunny is Marianne McAndrew from The Bat People!

Wayne Power,  Erik Holland (Maniac Cop), Hank Rolike, Paul Ryan, Barbara Lynn Block, Michael Milhoan, R.J. Adams, Jack Scalici, Lisa Hope Ross and Selby Dessner play smaller roles.

What happens?

Jessica’s book The Corpse Danced at Midnight has been optioned to be made into a movie. She flies out to Hollywood and is informed by her lawyer, Marty Strindberg, that they’re stuck and the film is getting made no matter what. After getting turned away at the studio gate, Jessica makes fast friends with costume designer Marta Quintessa (Samantha Eggar looks as if she brought all her clothes, as usual) and gets on set.

Jerry, the producer, and Eve, the actress, are dating, which never goes well. Yes, 48-year-old John Saxon and 22-year-old Melissa Sue Anderson are hooking up. This is very realistic when it comes to Hollywood. Jessica arrives just in time for the nude scene—the only one in a slasher. Maybe it’s not all realistic.

Jessica and producer Jerry battled it out over his movies, and wow, somehow, he had the budget to create this amazing poster for them.

But let’s give it up to Jessica. When she reads the contract over, she realizes she’s wrong and apologizes. However, it’s too late, as Jerry’s body is dead on the film’s cemetery set. Luckily, despite finding the body, the police don’t investigate Jessica. Maybe it’s because Lieutenant Hernandez is a big fan. He is such a fan that he trusts Jessica to visit Eve and tell her that her boyfriend is deceased.

So yes, while Jessica is a suspect, she gets to run around a lot. This allows us to see the movie being made, and man, I know 1984 had neon, but this movie has so much neon.

I spoke too soon, however, as Lieutenant Hernandez arrests J.B. But when they get to jail, he asks her to investigate everything for the police. There have to be better ways to get someone to help you. Despite being blocked from the set now, Jessica dresses as a tourist and learns that everyone wanted to kill Jerry for one reason or another: Marta is an ex, Eve was cheating on him, Allan had his screenplay rewritten, and if Ross gets to be the producer, his career will get the comeback it needs.

Who did it?

Eve was worried that Jerry would ruin her boyfriend Scott’s career.

Who made it?

Richard A. Colla also made Battlestar GalacticaFuzz and The Questor Tapes.

Executive story editor Robert Van Scoyk wrote the script.

Some facts…

This episode reveals that the B in J.B. stands for Beatrice.

A poster for an adult movie, Vampire Cheerleaders, also appears in the Simon & Simon episode “The Wrong Stuff.” This is proof that both shows are in the same universe (well, the crossover confirms this).

Does Jessica get some?

This movie starts with Captain Ethan Clegg working on Jessica’s plumbing. No man works on a woman’s sink without trying to work on her more essential plumbing.

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

Yes. For the first time, we get Jessica going undercover and acting like a moron. It gets way worse.

Was it any good?

I loved this episode. It features Saxon and Eggar, two of my favorites, and it gets Jessica away from Cabot Cove and trapped in the middle of a mystery, one she’s suspected of. It sets up so many themes the show would return to and become a warm blanket for me.

Give me a reasonable quote:

Marta Quintessa: Sorry to bring this up, but shouldn’t someone tell our star that her star-maker has gone to his Maker?

TV Newsman #1: I’m referring to the scene where the psychotic killer uses a flamethrower on a group of breakdancers.

Marty Strindberg: What do I know about the picture? Well, it’s guaranteed box office magic, that’s all. It’s a combination of Halloween, Porky’s and Flashdance.

Got a TV Guide ad?

What’s next?

One of my favorite episodes is when Wealthy Denton Langley falls off a horse, dies and leaves most of his estate to his dog, Teddy.

Murder, She Wrote S1 E2: Birds of a Feather (1984)

Jessica’s niece, Victoria Brandon (Genie Francis), learns that her fiancé Howard Griffin (Jeff Conaway) is performing in drag and may be the killer of the owner of his club, Al Drake (Martin Landau). Does everyone in Jessica’s family have issues with the people they marry?

Season 1, Episode 2: Birds of a Feather (October 14, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

Jessica’s niece doesn’t know much about the man she’s in love with.

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Ladsbury and were they in any exploitation movies?

Bart Braverman plays Bill Patterson. He was in 20 Million Miles to EarthThe Great Texas Dynamite CaseAlligator and Hollywood Hot Tubs 2: Educating Crystal.

Genie Francis, Jessica’s niece, has played Laura Spencer on General Hospital since 1977. Her soon-to-be groom is played by Jeff Conaway, who was in Taxi and several erotic thrillers like In a Moment of Passion, Mirror ImagesThe Banker and Sunset Strip. They would both return as the same characters in season 3, episode 5, “Corned Beef and Cabbage.” Howard is in season 6, episode 15, “The Fixer-Upper,” but Dean Butler is in the role.

Mike Dupont is played by Dick Gautier, the voice of Hot Rod on The Transformers, Serpentor in G.I. Joe and Hymie on Get Smart. He’s in one other episode of this show.

Lt. Floyd Novack is Harry Guardino, who played Bressler in Dirty Harry and The Enforcer, one of many police officer roles.

Comedian Freddy York is Gabe Kaplan, who everyone knows best from Welcome Back, Kotter.

The evil club owner? That’s Martin Landau, who became a big star again after Ed Wood but also made movies like SliverAlone In the DarkThe BeingWithout Warning and Shadows In an Empty Room. His wife, Candice, is Carol Lawrence. She sang “I Feel Pretty” and appeared in three other Murder, She Wrote episodes.

Barbara Stevenson is played by Barbara Rhodes, who was No Balls Hadley in The Choirboys.

In the minor roles, we have Robin Bach (the first of five appearances on the show), John O’Leary, William Phipps (the voice of Cinderella‘s Prince Charming), Brian Avery, Gary Pagett, Herndon Jackson, Tony Ballen, Nick Savage, Ken Clayton, Bret Dunsford, Shirley Lang, Ethelreda Leopold (whose career stretched back to 1931) and he husband Joe Pine, Lemuel Perry and early parts for George Clooney and Andy Garcia.

What happens?

Mike Dupont and Al Drake get into an argument — just after he shuts down another man named Howard, telling him that he has to be at the club tonight — just to make us wonder who they are. As we get the idea that one of them wants to murder the other, we meet Jessica’s niece, Victoria, who has wedding fever. She also wants her aunt to love her future partner, who always works. He’s Howard, the guy we saw mistreated by Al Drake a few minutes ago.

Howard has blown her off for the last five evenings and keeps coming home smelling of perfume, with lipstick all over him. Jessica tries to gently suggest that perhaps they should investigate what’s happening, leading them to find matchbooks from a nightclub. And when they go to that nightclub, not only do they see some lousy comedy from Freddy, but they also see a drag act. Just as he starts his act, someone yells, and it turns out that Al has been shot and killed. Howard, who runs out of the room, is blamed as the murderer, which means that Jessica goes from trying to find out if he’s a cheat to defending him against the police.  And oh yeah, Howard is also in drag.

Jessica figures out that the murder happened sooner than it appears. Meanwhile, Mrs. Drake — who was having an affair with the other male in drag, Mike — fires Barbara, who was possibly having an affair with her husband. Jessica gets the scoop on this dirt just in time for Freddy to almost get killed by falling lights.

Then, Jessica turns on the charm by heading to Novak’s apartment and playing with his cat, just as the tough guy reveals that he’s a soft touch. He’s also concerned that she’s been targeted because she knows too much. Then, as she tries to nap, a pillow reminds her of the clue she missed.

Who did it?

Freddy York, who used a pillow as a silencer. Jessica pulls off an incredible guess here, as his office has a window, and he has the only sunbaked pillow.

Who made it?

John Llewellyn Moxey directed this, the first of eighteen episodes of the show he would direct. His TV movie career is one of the finest you’ll find; he also directed The City of the Dead. He always worked with over a hundred credits, and the best of his directing includes The Night Stalker and Home for the Holidays.

This is the first episode not written by one of the creators. Robert Swanson, who wrote 87 Murder, She Wrote stories, contributed his first one. He spent most of his career writing for TV. Robert Van Scoyk, who had a similar career, is the executive story editor.

Some facts…

Some time has passed between the last episode and this story, as Jessica has six best-selling books.

The only person to kill someone in the Fletcher family was a soldier in the Revolutionary War.

Does Jessica get some?

No, but she does charm Lt. Novak’s assistant. When Novak says, “What is it about that woman that makes me nervous?” he says, “I think she’s kind of cute.” Somehow, she gets some of the evidence thanks to this guy. That said, she does go to Novak’s apartment.

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

No.

Was it any good?

This is the first episode in which Jessica is more nosy than a detective, but it’s not bad. This episode sets up the way the show will be for most episodes, but like a warm cup of tea, you always know what it will taste like, yet it relaxes you when you need it.

Give me a reasonable quote:

Jessica Fletcher: I’ve got the name of a very good lawyer. Is there anything else you need?

Howard Griffin: How about a pair of pants?

Got a TV Guide ad?

No.

What’s next?

Jessica has one of her books turned into a slasher in an episode filled with some of my favorite actors!

Murder, She Wrote S1 E1: Deadly Lady (1984)

After the pilot, we learn who Jessica is, what she does, and how she solves crimes. But what about Cabot Cove, her hometown? What’s that like? And how does it become the murder capital of the world, thanks to Jessica living there? This episode will introduce us to its many recurring characters.

Season 1, episode 1: Deadly Lady (October 7, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

A mysterious person visits Jessica — who never even met him — and is swept into a hurricane. 

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Lansbury and were they in any exploitation movies?

The first continuing cast member — for four episodes — is Captain Ethan Cragg, played by Claude Atkins, who is used to playing lawmen. After all, he was the son of a police officer. Beyond being Sheriff Lobo, a spinoff character from BJ and the Bear, he also was in The CurseTentacles (as a sheriff), Battle for the Planet of the Apes as General Aldo, The Night Stalker TV movie (yes, as a sheriff) and a ton of guest star roles on TV shows.

Sheriff Amos Tupper is the main recurring character on the show, other than Jessica. In addition to appearing on 255 episodes of Happy Days, Tom Bosley left the show to appear on the Father Dowling Mysteries for 42 episodes. He’s in 19 episodes of this show and is one of the main culprits that I bring up of older men who are trying to get wild with Mrs. Fletcher.

Doran Clark (The WarriorsBlack Eagle) is Nancy Earle. Like many actors, she would be on Murder, She Wrote more than once, returning for two more appearances as different characters.

Howard Duff comes from the Golden Age of Hollywood and guest-starred on just about every major TV show of the 1970s and 1980s. Here, he plays Ralph and Stephen Earl in a dual role.

Marilyn Hassett is most famous for the two The Other Side of the Mountain movies. This is the first of three guest star roles on the show for her, as she appears as Maggie Earl.

Terry Jones is played by former Battlestar Galactica actor Richard Hatch, who was in some great junk like Prisoners of the Lost UniverseParty LineDark Bar and Delta Force Commando II: Priority Red One.

Ann Lockhart has plenty of voiceover work on her resume and appearances in Dark TowerTroll and 10 to Midnight. She’s Grace Earl Lamont in this one.

Loretta Young discovered Dack Rambo, best known for playing Jack Ewing in Dallas. On August 30, 1991, he left the soap opera Another World and never acted again after learning he had contracted HIV. Sadly, he died in 1994, one of the first celebrities to be open about AIDS.

Cassie Yates appeared in The Evil before this episode, the first of four in which she would appear.

In the minor roles, we have Tom Bower, Carol Swarbrick, John Petlock, Robert Beecher and Jackie Joseph, the original Audry in Little Shop of Horrors.

What happens?

A hurricane has hit Cabot Cove, home of mystery writer Jessica Fletcher, and a yacht with four sisters — Nancy, Maggie, Lisa and Grace — is rescued, but claim that their father, Stephen, was swept overboard.

Meanwhile, a seemingly homeless man named Ralph appears and asks Jessica if he can do some work around the house. Despite being what some would call a hobo, he’s well-dressed, and she quickly takes a liking to him.

Sheriff Tupper refuses to declare Stephen dead, as the girls are all heirs to his fortune. Maggie soon confesses to killing him, but then Ralph’s body washes up and he’s definitely Stephen. The truth? The sisters worked with their dad to draw out Nancy’s ex-fiancé, Terry Jones, and prove he stole from her. But then, who killed the dad?

Stephen died while Maggie was in the custody of the police. What a tangled mess of shoe colors, family rivalry and Jessica making educated guesses. Can Cabot Cove’s most famous citizen find the real killer?

Who did it?

Maggie, working with Terry, set up her sister Nancy.

Who made it?

The same character made the pilot with Corey Allan directing and show creators Fischer, Levinson and Link writing for the first official episode of the series. It’s shot by the same talent as that episode, Mario Di Leo.

Some facts…

For those Battlestar fans, you already know that Richard Hatch and Anne Lockhart played Captain Apollo and Lieutenant Sheba on the original show.

The Hill House Hotel in Cabot Cove is actually The Hill House Inn in Mendocino, CA. According to its website, it’s currently being renovated but will open soon.

It seemed like every 80s show had an unseen character, like Vera on CheersMurder, She Wrote has telephone operator Letitia, who makes her first audio appearance in this installment.

In this episode, we learn that Jessica has written at least three books, the latest of which is Dirge for a Dead Dachshund.

Does Jessica get some?

It doesn’t seem like it, but we set up the relationships between Jessica and Amos- a long-time friend- and her and Ethan, who can’t stand her. Then again, there’s a thin line between anger and rolling around in the sack. After all, just look at this flirty dialogue between them:

Capt. Ethan Cragg: I suppose that means you’ll want me to bait your hook, too.

Jessica Fletcher: Of course. You always do, don’t you?

That said, if I were writing fan fiction, Ralph would make a home between her thighs. Just look at her face while they’re talking.

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

No, but trust me, these moments are coming.

Was it any good?

It’s a good first regular-length episode, setting up the town, how Jessica fits in and how easily she can solve these mysteries.

Give me a reasonable quote:

Capt. Ethan Cragg: Amos, you’ve been reading too many of Jessica’s books.

Sheriff Amos Tupper: Well, that’s how much you know, Ethan. I haven’t read any of ’em.

Got a TV Guide ad?

No, but I have the show’s page from the fall preview issue.

What’s next?

In “Birds of a Feather,” Jessica’s niece Victoria Brandon — another problem relative — is shocked when her fiancé Howard Griffin is arrested for the murder of San Francisco drag club owner Al Drake.

Murder, She Wrote pilot episode: The Murder of Sherlock Holmes (1984)

Created by Peter S. Fischer, William Link and Richard Levinson — the latter two were also the creators of Columbo — this show was originally going to star Jean Stapleton, who turned it down. Angela Lansbury, who had played Ms. Marple in several movies, was the perfect choice to play Jessica MacGill Fletcher, a woman from a small coastal New England town who goes on to become a famous author and mystery solver, if not a serial killer with all of the people who die around her.

If you’re wondering, where is Cabot Cove? It’s Mendocino, CA and Noyo Harbor in Fort Bragg, CA.

I’m obsessed by this show. The fact that it has so many murders around one woman, the fact that all kinds of exploitation actors show up in it and the fact that so many white-haired dudes are vying to pound it out with Jessica. I watch the Murder, She Wrote Pluto and Roku channels constantly, jumping into episodes and knowing exactly where they are, because I’ve watched them so often. My wife and I own the gigantic early DVD box sets, even the TV movies.

Why should I keep this all to myself? I should share my Jessica Fletcher mania with you.

Pilot episode: The Murder of Sherlock Holmes (September 30, 1984)

Tonight on Murder, She Wrote

In the episode that kicks off the entire show, Jessica Fletcher travels to New York City to celebrate the release of her debut novel — just in time for someone to get killed at a costume party.

Who’s in it, outside of Angela Lansbury and were they in any exploitation movies?

Peter Brill is played by Bert Convy, who, in addition to being in two episodes of Murder, She Wrote, also shows up in Jennifer and A Bucket of Blood.

Herb Edelman appears and would later be NYPD Lieutenant Artie Gelber, a role he’d play seven times on the show. He also is in the Hong Kong action film Wheels On Meals.

As Rocky Horror tells us, Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet. She was also in the supernatural TV movie Haunts of the Very Rich and three episodes of this show, starting with this episode as Louise McCallum.

Michael Horton makes his first Murder, She Wrote appearance as one of my most hated characters. Grady Fletcher. He’d be on the show twelve times, always screwing things up and needing his aunt Jessica to come in and save him. Since the show, he’s appeared in several Star Trek shows and films.

Dennis Patrick, who played Dexter Baxendale in this episode, has appeared in several roles on Dark Shadows and played rich man Bill Compton in the early Cannon movie Joe. He’s also appeared in Nightmare HoneymoonThe Time Travelers and many other TV roles.

The doctor in this episode was played by Raymond St. Jacques, a street preacher in They Live, Claude in the John Russo adaptation Voodoo Dawn, opposite Bronson in The Evil That Men Do and also shows up in Cotton Comes to Harlem.

This episode, as you can tell, is packed with stars. Ned Beatty may be the biggest, appearing as Chief Roy Gunderson. He has 163 roles in his career, most of them in major Hollywood productions. Still, we can count 21st Century’s Captain AmericaRepossessedPurple People EaterThe UnholyRolling Vengeance and Exorcist II: The Heretic as exploitation in my book.

Arthur Hill, who plays Preston Giles, Jessica’s first publisher, in two episodes of this series, also narrates Something Wicked This Way Comes, is the vice president in Murder In Space and appears in Revenge of the Stepford WivesFutureworld and The Andromeda Strain.

Brian Keith was an actor with 169 roles, including Uncle Ben in the 90s Spider-Man cartoon, Papa in Sharky’s Machine, Dr. Dubov in Meteor and the Dad in The Parent Trap.

Paddi Edwards, Lois Hoey was a secretary in Halloween III! Sure, she’s Flotsam and Jetsam in the Disney cartoons, but this is the role I’m happy for.

The radio show host, Danny Welles, is Luigi from the TV show Super Mario Supershow!

Marvin is played by Stanley Brock, Weird Al’s uncle in UHF.

In the minor roles — there are no minor roles! — we have Johnny Venokur (Savage StreetsEvil Laugh) as a tough, Andy Garcia (!) as his co-tough, Mama Fratelli herself Anne Ramsey as a bag lady, Paula Victor (The Entity), Billie Hayes (Witchiepoo!), Beau Star (Sheriff Meeker from Halloween 4 and 5) as a cop, KTLA anchor Larry McCormick and Sallee Young (Home Sweet HomeDemented and Pandemonium).

What happens?

Jessica Fletcher is a widower and schoolteacher from Cabot Cova, Maine—yes, I know we all know this, but it’s the first episode—whose hobby is writing mysteries. Her excoriable nephew Grady sends one of those stories to publisher Preston Giles, who buys it. Now Jessica has to come to New York City and hates every second. Giles begs for her to stay on for his costume party.

She meets composer Peter Brill, Grady’s boss, Captain Caleb McCallum, his wife Louise and the rich Ashley Vickers. Up until the murder- it’s right there in the title- everything is fun, and people are super into Jessica dressing like Cinderlla’s fairy godmother until Dexter Baxendale, a detective, is caught looking around. And oh yeah, Caleb is getting killed, dressed as Sherlock Holmes, to explain that this episode’s title wasn’t lying. Shot in the head, left floating face down in a pool, but then it’s discovered that Caleb is alive, and that’s Baxendale’s body.

Jessica is shocked that, of all people, Grady gets arrested for the murder. Stick around for 12 seasons and see how surprised you will be that Grady gets into some shenanigans. Jessica must solve the case and potentially fall in love with Giles. Except that, well…

Who did it?

Giles is the killer, as he used to work with the detective, and his past crimes would be revealed to him. It looks like Jessica has to get a new publisher.

Who made it?

Corey Allan directed, and he is a veteran of TV shows and an actor who was in Rebel Without a Cause. Fischer, Levinson and Link, who created the show, wrote the story, which Fischer turned into a script.

Mario Di Leo, the cinematographer on The Evil and a still photographer for the berserk Italian movie Top Line, shot this. That last fact is blowing my mind.

Some facts…

Jessica is introduced just like Miss Marple in The Mirror Crack’d, a movie adaptation starring Lansbury. She also types her books on a 1940s Royal typewriter, the same one that Ellery Queen used on the series from the same producers.

How many people live in Cabot Cove? 3,560. Well, for now. By the end of the series, many of them are dead.

Does Jessica get some?

This is a significant point of debate for me with every episode of Murder, She Wrote. Jessica is supposedly in her early 50s, just like me, so she’s still a woman with wants and needs. It seems like many older gentlemen in this show would love to dig up some sand crabs with our heroine, and I say we should champion this.

Preston Giles is one of the few of her would-be men who kisses her full on the lips. Seeing how he comes back to woo her again in season 7, I will say that he could not get enough once he had a taste of her New England baking. So yes, I will say that they at least engaged in heavy petting and perhaps Jessica rubbed up against him. She’s a lady, however, and I don’t think she went into the pants or gave him an Old Fashioned at this early stage of their relationship.

But this dialogue!

Preston Giles: I’m so sorry. I should have told you. For tonight’s party, we’re coming dressed as our favorite fictional character. I know, I know. You haven’t got a thing to wear.

Jessica Fletcher: Well, I could always come as Lady Godiva.

This is cut footage of Jessica directly after they spoke…

Does Jessica dress up and act stupid?

Yes and no. She does wear an outfit, but it’s for a costume party. This gets her off the hook, but as the show continues, look for Jessica to put on costumes and act drunk more than the Harts.

Was it any good?

There’s some math to do here. Any episode with Grady in it can’t be a perfect ten, as his presence angers me to madness. However, this has a solid mystery, even if it’s cribbed from Agatha Christie’s “The Affair At The Victory Ball.” It’s also a two-parter with a pretty decent plot that sets up all the show’s beats. So I’d say yes. No secret spinoff or Jessica is being wasted, things that ruin later episodes.

Give me a reasonable quote:

“You know, back in Cabot Cove, the only thing we have with claws are lobsters, and we eat ’em.”

Got a TV Guide ad?

CBS really wanted this to be a success because there’s a double-page ad!

What’s next?

In “Deadly Lady,” a visitor who has stopped at Jessica’s house turns up dead, swept away in a hurricane before Jessica even meets him. Get ready to meet Captain Ethan Cragg and Sheriff Amos Tupper, two lawmen I think both slept with Jessica. At the same time? Let’s discuss.

Fear City (1984)

After The Driller Killer and Ms .45, Abel Ferrara made this another New York City end-of-the-century trip into sleaze and death. He was joined by regular writer Nicholas St. John, who was fine doing the script for 9 Lives of a Wet Pussy but couldn’t deal with Bad Lieutenant.

Matt Rossi (Tom Berenger) and Nicky Parzeno (Jack Scalia) have a good thing going, getting their exotic dancers — Maria Conchita Alonso is one of them — booked into the best men’s clubs in the Big Apple. Matt used to be a boxer and was in love with one of the girls, Loretta (Melanie Griffith), but then he beat a man to death and became a shell of who he once was, and she found herself seeking solace between the shapely thighs of Leika (Rae Dawn Chong).

Someone starts targeting their girls, like Honey (Ola Ray, Michael Jackson’s girlfriend in the “Thriller” video), who is beaten and torn apart by someone. Detective Al Wheeler (Billy Dee Williams) isn’t much help, as he looks down on Rossi, Parzeno, and their girls. Leila is attacked and hospitalized, which lets Rossi get back with Loretta.

Unlike many Giallo, we see Pazzo (John Foster), the killer, early and know who he is throughout. He’s a young kid obsessed with martial arts. His attacks have ruined the dancing business, and once Leila dies, Loretta starts taking every drug she can, dying inside. Then, the killer attacks Ruby (Janet Julian) and Parzeno, as well as cutting the head off one of the girls with a sword.

Rossi turns to Carmine (Rossano Brazzi, Count Frankenstein from Frankenstein’s Castle of Freaks), a crime boss who he has an accord with. He tells him that the only way to stop this is to murder the killer and get this over with. That’s simple, as the knife-wielding maniac is already stabbing Loretta, who was looking to score. Rossi remembers his days in the ring and punches the man’s face into putty, killing him. The cops seem happy about it, but that’s life in Fear City.

How Giallo is this? Well, the credits thank J & B Distillery.

Fear City was originally to be a 20th Century Fox movie, but because it contained so much sex and violence, they sold it to Aquarius Releasing—or Chevy Chase Distribution—the people who brought you Dr. Butcher, M.D. and 7 Doors of Death, which was The Beyond with edits.

Don Nakaya Neilsen is in the cast as a boxer. Trained by Benny “The Jet” Urquidez and Tom Stone—the man who cucked Elvis and wrote Enter the Ninja—he was a kickboxer who eventually became a pro wrestler in New Japan Pro Wrestling and did an MMA match with Ken Shamrock that was quite influential in Japan. He also got chiropractic treatments legalized in Thailand, so he lived a pretty eventful life before dying young at 58.

You can watch this on Tubi.

Blind Date (1984)

“The ultimate high tech thriller,” this Nico Mastorakis-directed movie — he also wrote it with his regular script partner Fred Perry — succeeds in getting one part of the Giallo genre right: its science is absolute bullshit.

Jonathan Ratcliff (Joseph Bottoms) is an ad exec working in Greece who should be happy with his life and his current flame, Claire (Kirstie Alley). Yet one day, he thinks he sees Marien (the doomed in real-life Lana Clarkson), a woman from the past who went insane after being assaulted by multiple men. He drops everything and starts to stalk her, even after discovering her name is Rachel. And then, the movie is flipped around when Jonathan loses his sight. Helpless to protect Rachel from a knife-wielding point of view, Giallo’s gloved psychosexual murderer — the Scalpel Killer — runs wild through the dark nights of Athens; he has Dr. Steiger (Keir Dullea) create a medical miracle: a small unit that allows his eyes to see Atari 5200-style graphics of the real world. If he uses it too much, he’ll fry his brain. The killer might get him before that.

The Scalpel Killer makes his way through several victims, starting with Antigone Amanitou, who goes from her shower directly to being drawn on and operated without the benefit of any painkillers. His second victim is a pre-Star Trek: TNG Marina Sirtis, back in the days when she was stuck being the victim of Michael Winner in Death Wish 3 and The XXX Lady. There’s some wonderful stalking POV here, making this feel closer to Italy than Greece. The Scalpel Killer changes his M.O., taking out a married couple, played by Kathy Hill and Louis Sheldon, before finding one more single lady in the tub, played by Noelle Simpson.

While Ratcliff may not be the most compelling hero, the film introduces some unique elements. The concept of headphones that transform sound into visuals is fascinating, as is the scene where Ratcliff accidentally unplugs the headphones, rendering himself blind and in danger as he’s being stalked on the edge of a building.

Masorakis knows how to make these video store-era movies. Sure, they can get overloaded and too long, but he also hires gorgeous actresses, somehow convinces them to disrobe (this is Alley’s only nude scene) and also has some genuinely good moments amongst the silliness, such as when the killer sits at Rachel’s bedside and silently watches her sleep. If it had more gloss and fashion, it’d be close to the Italian model mid-80s Giallo that I am obsessed with, but for what this is, I’m satisfied. Ladies, I wish you had a more interesting protagonist, but this definitely matches the genre’s need for enticing victims.

The credits promised a sequel that never arrived, Run, Stumble and Fall.

You can watch this on Tubi.

VIDEO ARCHIVES SEASON 2: Killpoint (1984)

VIDEO ARCHIVES NOTES: This movie was discussed on the Patreon for the Video Archives podcast. You can hear a preview here.

Frank Harris has been featured plenty on this site — Killpoint has been written about once before, as well as Low Blow, The Patriot and Aftershock — and he’s movie’s director, producer, screenwriter and cinematographer. Harris was once a news reporter who personally witnessed street violence and also worked on police training films, so he hired real cops and gang members to make this.

What it has going for it is Cameron Mitchell as big bad Joe Marks and Stack Pierce as his henchman Nighthawk. They’re stealing military weapons and selling them to gangs and this leads to a gangbanger having a weapon of mass destruction in his hands that kills the wife of Lt. James Wong (Leo Fong).

And oh yeah, this is 1984, so she was also sexually assaulted before she was killed.

Teaming up with FBI Agent Bill Bryant (Richard Roundtree), they start to track down where the guns are coming from. Meanwhile, Cameron Mitchell is killing hookers, shooting up TV sets, smoking in bed and lavishing attention on his dog Sparky, even trying to teach him how to smoke just like dad. Later, he puts flowers in his hair and soaks in a hot tub, along with grabbing a machine gun and shooting every teenager inside a Chinese restaurant.

Leo Fong has facial paralysis of a sort and a charisma void inside him, as he just stares into you as his dead eyes find the red light on the camera and he listlessly does martial arts montages that have nothing to do with the rest of the movie. He also would come back to play the same role in Showdown, a movie that he didn’t just star in, he directed. He also squares off with Richard Lynch, so you know I’m looking for this movie now, which is not the other Showdown from 1993 which has Billy Blanks in it.

But seriously: Cameron Mitchell should be worshipped for this movie.

Bill “Superfoot” Wallace is in it and the Chuck Norris school gets thanked. What else do you want?

You can watch this on YouTube.