The Secret of Seagull Island (1982)

The TV mini-series Seagull Island is 3 hours and 36 minutes long. The movie that they hacked it into is an hour and forty two minutes. As you can imagine, a lot gets lost, but this is not a unique thing. Yor Hunter from the Future and The Scorpion With Two Tails were also originally made as TV miniseries that were edited.

Barbara Carey (Prunella Ransome, Who Can Kill a Child?) has come to Rome to visit her blind concert pianist sister Marianne Saunders (Sherry Buchanan, Eyes Behind the Stars). It turns out that she’s the third blind girl to go missing recently, so like many a gialli heroine, Barbara investigates the case along with British Consulate Martin Foster (Nicky Henson). Her detective work takes her to the private island of millionaire David Malcom (Jeremy Brett), a place filled with secrets and, yes, the bodies of women without their eyes.

This is the kind of movie where the sounds of seagulls causes a woman to get so upset that she jumps right out a window and where ineffective cops literally have waiters in the squad room ready to bring them hard boiled eggs.

This aired on the CBS Late Movie on May 27, 1983. It’s not the only giallo that CBS played, as The Bird With the Crystal Plumage also aired on that venerable late night movie destination.

As for this movie, it makes me wonder. A spoiler, but why don’t rich people with deformed children look into a support group or working with a professional instead of doing it on their own and getting beautiful women killed? Then again, so many gialli would never be made if these fictional families got it together.

La strana storia di Olga ‘O’ (1995)

Olga’s (Serena Grandi, Delirium) life is one that will forever be damaged by childhood trauma, as her father killed himself before her eyes. Now, along with her husband Paolo (David Brandon), she is finally going home. This starts with a hell of a dream sequence, as Olga remembers her mother covered in blood and her shooting her father in the face. This memory or vision or way of dealing with her father’s suicide is why she has blamed herself for it since she was young. Her psychiatrist, Dr. Carlo Ferranti (Dobromir Manev), believes that confronting her past will help her heal. After all, she has a good marriage and a supportive partner, right?

She gets the opportunity to see her old friends like Isabel (Daniela Poggi) and Sheila (Florinda Bolkan), as well as experience the club where she once danced and sang. But one night, while staying at her family’s home, Olga is attacked by a mysterious intruder. Only Inspector Michael Manning (Stéphane Ferrara), a police officer she once had an affair with, believes her. Everyone else thinks that Olga has finally lost her mind.

The stalker remembers that our heroine used to be an exotic dancer called Olga O — yes, not much of a name change or disguise — and keeps using that name as he chases her on motorcycle and leaves those messages. Yet she also feels drawn to danger and if that feels like, well, a strange vice, that’s because this is co-written by the man who wrote so many gialli — including The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh — Ernesto Gastaldi. Along with Daniele Stroppa and Maria Cociani, he’s put together a pretty good plot that makes one look to the past but enjoy what they are currently watching. What helps is that the cinematographer was Luigi Kuveiller (Deep RedA Quiet Place In the CountryA Lizard In a Woman’s Skin), who definitely knows how to shoot a giallo movie, and the director Antonio Bonifacioas picked up a few things from working with Joe D’Amato. I also liked his Appuntamento in nero and this improves on that.

By the end, Olga is seeing dead bodies in her bed, unsure of who to trust and may even have tried to kill herself. Is there anyone who can save our heroine? I really enjoyed Olga’s Strange Story and it was worth the time that it took for time to find it.

IF YOU’RE GONNA SCREAM, SCREAM WITH THE DIA DOUBLE FEATURE

This Saturday at 8 PM EST, Unkle Spooky and Mike Justice will join Bill for two wild movies. You can join them on the Groovy Doom Facebook and YouTube pages.

Up first — and this is a first! — is director Mike Justice’s The Trouble With Barry. You can tell Mike what you think of the movie live and in-person. Or at least via char. You can watch it on Tubi.

This week, I’m breaking with tradition by serving two drinks. Yes, each week we watch movies, talk about them, check out their ad campaigns and have matching cocktails.

The first is the actual cocktail that Barry enjoys throughout the movie!

Barry’s Usual

  • 1.5 oz. vodka
  • 6 oz. Fresca
  1. Pour vodka over ice.
  2. Top with Fresca and try not to kill anyone.

Now here’s the second one.

The Burned Gerbil

  • 1.5 oz. vodka
  • 1.5 oz. ginger ale
  • Splash of orange juice
  • Dust of cinnamon
  1. Mix ingredients over ice.
  2. Stir, then top with a little bit of spice.

The second movie is The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane which you can find on Tubi.

Here’s the cocktail.

The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lemonade

  • 2 oz. white rum
  • 2 oz. dark rum
  • 1 oz. lime juice
  • 1 oz. cream of coconut
  • A handful of frozen raspberries
  • 6 oz. lemonade
  1. Muddle raspberries, then shake with all liquids in a cocktail shaker.
  2. Pour over crushed ice and drop an old lady into a trap door.

I will miss everyone Saturday but I will be back next week.

Spogliando valeria (1989)

Jealous Eyes was directed by Bruno Gaburro (MalombraFashion Crimes), who its OK to be jealous of yourself because he was once married to Erika Blanc. It was written by Roberto Leoni (who wrote Santa Sangre the same year and also was the writer of American Rickshaw and My Dear Killer).

Also known as Blue Chill, this is an erotic thriller in which Chris (Donald Burton) loses a friend and moves into his apartment to compose a song in memory. That means that he’s blowing his sax at all hours of the day and night, so this movie has not just 80s sex sax but also straight up saxophone. He meets Eva (Dalila Di Lazzaro, who is the female monster in Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein and also shows up in Frankenstein 80, which is pretty much all it takes to get me obsessed; she’s also the headmistress in Phenomena) and he can put away his sax — am I getting paid for using that word so much or is this a search engine optimization trick? — and start hearing it on the soundtrack as they start having some adult naptime. Have hot pudding for supper. Moistening the Pope. You know. The sex.

She claims that her husband Senator Verani (Gérard Manzetti) and her stepson — who this being an Italian movie, she is also sleeping with — are busing her and that Chris needs to kill them both. Look, when you just start dating someone and pillow talk turns to “you need to kill for me,” you are in a giallo. Or a neo-noir. Or an erotic thriller. As you can imagine, when they are killed, Eva tries to get him to confess to the crime. But ah, perhaps she tried the same thing with his friend. And doesn’t he have a song to write?

Gaburro edited footage from this movie and Alcune signore per bene into 1993’s Rose rosse per una squillo (Scandalous Liasons). This is how I get into these gialli rabbit holes, because I just read what Alcune signore per bene is about: “Sexual infedelity, blackmail, murder and suicide plague a fashion house and its nymphomaniac owner…” And it has Eva Grimaldi and Florence Guérin in it? Time to start looking.

Il venditore di morte (1971)

The Price of Death comes as the Italian Western has given way to the giallo. Therefore, this is nearly a last gasp and an acceptance of the shift. It’s also very much a Eurospy, as the hero, Silver (Gianni Garko) is a dandy who lives with several gorgeous women and always is surrounded by luxury.

Now, we all know and love Garko as Sartana — in all but Sartana’s Here… Trade Your Pistol for a Coffin in which George Hilton plays the role — but the character of Silver first appeared in Killer Caliber .32 in which he was played by Peter Lee Lawrence and is also in Killer Adios, even if his name is Jessy in that film. The character is the coolest man in the West, always calm and collected, a detective, bounty hunter and unstoppable gunfighter.

That said, Silver dresses in brown instead of black, but he still uses miniature hidden guns. He’s pretty much Sartana, but it’s not like that’s a bad thing.

This starts with a very giallo POV of a killer hunting down and stabbing a Carmen Morales (Franca De Stratis)  on the same evening where three masked men shot and kill several people at a bar. Sheriff Tom Stanton (Luciano Catenacci) kills two of the men but the third escapes. Everyone thinks that Chester Conway (Klaus Kinski) has to be the criminal, including Judge Atwell (Alfredo Rizzo), who sentences him to hang. In response, Conway’s lawyer Jeff Plummer (Franco Abbina) hires Silver to prove the innocence of his client after a trial where only Conway’s ex — Polly Winters (Mimma Biscardi) — stood up for him.

Silver is already working for the Morales family, looking for her killer, and he gets no help from the law and plenty of stares and murmurs from the townsfolk, who include Doc Rosencrantz (Luciano Pigozzi) and Reverend Tiller (Giancarlo Prete), proving the strength of this film’s cast.

Silver come across as Derek Flint mixed with Sherlock Holmes, training with martial artists, rescuing people and discovering that everyone in town is either sleeping with each other or working with one another to make money off one another. He also learns that while Conway is innocent of one crime, he may also be the man that he’s looking for.

Director and writer Lorenzo Gicca Palli also wrote Killer Caliber .32 and created Silver. He also directed and wrote Blackie the Pirate and two Zorro movies, so he definitely gets how to do an adventure movie. His other names that he worked as are Enzo Gicca and Vincent Thomas. I wish he’d made more movies with Silver, who deserves to be in as many films as Sartana and Sabata.

According to this review on the essential Spaghetti Western Database, there was a softcore scene shot for this movie with Biscardi and Dominique Badou, who doesn’t appear in the film, and a hardcore scene with Pietro Torrisi (who I just found out was in Check-up érotique, a porn directed by Renato Polselli!) and an unknown blonde actress. According to the book Wild West Gals, “illegal or semi-legal soft or hard-core versions of genre movies were often edited by producers and sold under the counter.” I would assume that some scenes like this also appeared in fumetti magazines like Cinesex and often aren’t in the actual movie.

You can watch this on YouTube.

Lo strano ricatto di una ragazza perbene (1974)

Directed and written by Luigi Batzella (who is also the Ivan Kathansky who made The Beast In Heat, the Paul Solvay who made Nude for Satan and The Devil’s Wedding Night and the Dean Jones who made God Is My Colt .45 but Joe D’Amato made a bunch of those as well, so he at least signed for them), Blackmail is all about bad girl Babel Stone (Brigitte Skay). She’s just been busted for drugs again and her father (Umberto Raho) has to bail her out. He’s probably wondering why the Italian title translates as The Strange Blackmail of a Respectable Girl.

Babel does have an excuse. When her mother died, her dad quickly got remarried to the much younger Stella (Rosalba Neri). If she was a son, she would probably understand. I mean, I get the need to grieve but Rosalba Neri, you know? Give your dad a rest.

She decides to get back at him — and make some money — that her friends Claudio (Benjamin Lev), Rick (Claudio Giorgi) and Eva (Nuccia Cardinali) will kidnap her. This seems a bit like Delitto al circolo del tennis but you know, the giallo directors never seem to trust hippies.

The whole plan goes wrong when they decide to hide at the home of Claudio’s sister Paola (Darla Abrem) and her husband Marcel (Lorenzo Piani) and they return home early, which means that they also have to get kidnapped.

You know how people thought that John Paul Getty III kidnapped himself? This movie is based on that, except that I doubt that that real life story had attacks on maids that end with sapphic interludes and Neri getting involved to make money off everyone. If you’re a fan of Skay — she’s also in Isabella, Duchess of the Devils, A Bay of BloodThe Love Factor and Four Times That Night — you’re probably going to want to see this. Beyond showing off her body for most of the running time, she plays a really ice cold manipulator and is the whole reason why this movie is a success.

Appuntamento in nero (1990)

Scandal In Black was directed by Antonio Bonifacio, making his directing debut after doing second unit on several Filmirage movies including Convent of SinnersDeliziaTop ModelZombie 5: Killing Birds and Pomeriggio caldo. He also worked with D’Amato and this movie’s writer, Daniele Stropa, on 1994’s Sul filo del rasoio.

We start the movie with a flashback, seeing how Angela Baldwin (Mirella Banti, Tenebrae) was assaulted when she was young. Then, we follow her to an adult theater where she shows up dressed in a short red dress and ensures that she’s seen before she goes to the bathroom and emerges with her body covered with blood, the victim of another attack.

The fact that his wife has been raped at a porn theater doesn’t seem to make her husband John (Andy J. Forest) all that happy, as he’s a diplomat whose career is moving upward. He wants to get rid of her and already has a new lover, her best friend, supermodel Eva (Mary Lindstrom). Seeing as how she lives with them, this makes things convenient for John. They want to get married but don’t want a scandal, so they start calling Angela as the man who attacked her and threaten her life.

Angela has even more problems because she’s been spied on by not only her maid Rosie (Laura Piattella), but also the projectionist (Franco Citti) at the theater who had a camera installed in the bathroom. He watched her attack herself, slamming her face into the mirror and slicing in her own flesh. Man, that scene is really hard to watch as is the moment when he attacks her, which is watched by a strange doll, reminding you that this is a giallo. And that theater also has Italian adult star Marina Frajese as its ticket taker (thanks Euro Fever for spotting her) as well as a posters for Top Model, Error Fatale and…Tucker A Man and His Dream?!? They’re showing Monique Gabrielle in Emmanuelle 5 in case you’re wondering!

There’s also a wild saw attack on the man who raped Angela when she was young that really goes hard. Unlike so many of the 1980s gialli that don’t seem like they could hang with the wonderful films of the early 70s, this really does seem like it has the twists and turns to make it. Sure, it doesn’t look as good as those movies, but unlike so many of the safe 80s movies, this has no problem being sleazy. Well done.

Dark Bar (1989)

Dark Bar is a secret place where people can do drugs and have sex together and keep it a secret. However, Elisabetta (Barbara Cupisti, who was as close as you get to a giallo queen in 1989, showing up in StagefrightOpera and The New York Ripper, as well as Eleven Days, Eleven Nights and Cemetery Man) plans on blackmailing someone and that gets her killed. Now, her jazz trombone playing sister Anna (Marina Suma) looks into her sister’s death which puts whoever killed Elisabetta after her.

This movie breaks the mold not only by having its black gloved killer have a gun as their murder weapon but also by the discovery of Elisabetta’s body in the next stall while the janitor makes love to someone else. It’s a great shot as sex is happening feet away from a grisly corpse.

This has Richard Hatch in it, which is an American star, sure. It also has a jazz score by Carlo Siliotto (The House of the Blue Shadows) which is a lot different from other gialli. Director and writer Stelio Fiorenza only shot three shorts and this movie, as well as working as an assistant director on Very Close Encounters of the Fourth Kind and Play Motel. He includes some cool touches, like a high heel telephone — what is it with late 80s Italian exploitation and weird telephones? — and Cupisti’s dress that is covered in eyeballs. And the Dark Bar itself feels like an Italian director who watched a few Lynch movies and decided that it should also be punk rock and I am all for all of these things. The bad guys all wear fedoras and are the henchmen of a blind woman who listens to sea shells and the tarot for what to do next.

It’s not good but it’s interesting which is sometimes better than good. It definitely has ideas and style. Style goes a long way in a giallo especially a late 80s one. I really wish someone would gather some of these — Vinegar Syndrome, if you really want your Forgotten Gialli set to live up to its name, release this — and share them with people who don’t want to hunt them down on Russian hack sites without subtitles.

Indagine su un delitto perfetto (1978)

CEO Sir Ronald Selmer‘s plane has blown up in flight, which brings together the Vice Presidents of his company —  Sir Arthur Dundee (Joseph Cotten), Paul De Revere (Leonard Mann) and Sir Harold Boyd (Adolfo Celi) — to discuss who will take over the company. The company pretty much runs the world, so each of them wants to be in charge, which means that anything can happen. And by anything I mean murder.

The smart money is on Selmer’s racecar driving nephew Paul — who even has a Keane painting in his office! — but someone sends his car off a cliff which brings in another family member, Superintendent Jeff Hawks (Anthony Steel), to solve the murders — yes, many murders — at the behest of Lady Clementine (Alida Valli, Suspiria).

There’s all sorts of wild moments along the way, like Sir Harold’s wife Gloria (Janet Agren) leaving a snooty fox hunt to be the roast beef in a man man sandwich in the stables, Sir Arthur trying to seduce and kill Sir Harold with one of his ladies — Polly (Gloria Guida) — and Sir Arthur’s pacemaker being short-circuited with a magnetic murder device.

Director and writer Giuseppe Rosati has a big cast and instead of making this an upper crust Agatha Christie thriller — she does get name-dropped — remembers that he’s Italian and that this whole movie should be sleazy. Well done! He directed this movie using the name Aaron Leviathan which is the best Italian Americanized name of all time. Giuseppe Rosati also made Those Dirty DogsSilence the Witness and The Left Hand of the Law.

The amazing Italo-Cinema points out that while this is set in London, it’s filmed in Italy, so if you see the graveyard from Antropophagus — which is set in Greece, I feel like I’m a world traveler — and some of the buildings from Suspiria.

The killer gets away with it! Come on! How many times have you seen that in a giallo? I kind of loved this but any time I see Joseph Cotten and Adolfo Celli in a movie, much less Janet Agren and Gloria Guida, well — I’m pleased.

You can watch this on YouTube.

Vacanze per un massacro (1980)

Joe Brezy (Joe Dallesandro making his last movie in Italy) is the kind of person that’ll escape prison, kill a man with a rock and stab an old man with a pitchfork before most of us have our second cup of coffee. Then, he asks an old man for everything that he knows about the cabin where Liliana (Patricia Behn), her sister Paola (Lorraine De Selle, House On the End of the Park) and her husband Sergio (Gianni Macchia) are having a very tense vacation.

The next day, when Sergio goes hunting and Liliana goes shopping, Joe makes his way inside and forces her to help him dig out the fireplace. As each person returns to the house, he makes them dig as well, as he’s hid money there before he got sent to jail. Oh yeah, he also reveals that Paola and Sergio are having an affair and forces them to make sweet — well, not so sweet — love in front of her.

The captives come up with a plan to escape, but Joe ends up shooting everyone but Liliana, who he wants to take away from all this madness. Instead, she shoots him and that’s our movie.

This was written by Mario Gariazzo (Play MotelEnter the DevilEyes Behind the Stars) and he intended to direct it, but Fernando Di Leo — whose company Cineproduzioni Daunia 70 produced many of Gariazzo’s movies — ended up making it instead. He wasn’t happy with the finished movie, saying that in Roberto Curti’s Italian Crime Filmography that it was a “disappointing film indeed, including my toying with Lorraine De Selle’s nude scenes. It’s mediocre, but not because I did wrong – I just wasn’t interested in it.” He added, “…you don’t always have the chance to do what you want, and often you know very well you’re making a bad movie, but you do it anyways.”

As for the soundtrack, Luis Bacalov brought music he had already used for Caliber 9 and The Designated Victim.

For being someone not known for his acting, Dallesandro is pretty good in this. That’s because he’s just seducing women and being a wildman. He’s used the right way and man, De Selle is the reason this all works. It’s a one room meltdown, primal violence and wanton lust.

You can watch this on YouTube.