This wee, we’ll be talking about the Joan Crawford and William Castle collaboration Strait-Jacket and Mario Bava’s Hatchet For The Honeymoon! Dustin Fallon from Horror And Sons will be on with us this time, which starts on Saturday at 8 PM EST on the Groovy Doom Facebook and YouTube pages.
Up first — Strait-Jacket, which you can watch on (LINK NEEDED).
Each week, we discuss the movie, show an ad gallery and make a themed drink. Here’s this week’s first recipe.
Strait-jacket
2 oz. Fireball
1 oz. Passoa
3 oz. orange juice
Build over ice in this order: Fireball, Passoa, then orange juice.
Mill Creek has been releasing several of these alien and conspiracy related collections, so let’s take a look at one that goes into the idea that mankind was born not from evolution or divine design, but by alien gods from beyond the stars.
Anunnaki: As a stock footage fire blazes on your screen, director, writer and narrator Philip Gardiner explains how giants once ruled our planet and created so much of our history, from the Garden of Eden to the Great Flood and all the secrets of the Book of Enoch. There’s also a long stretch of names being translated. It basically feels like a college course that you get no grade for, just a credit, so if you’re into that and want to know more about alien engineers, this movie is the place to be. You can watch this on Tubi.
Aliens in Egypt: Who really built the pyramids — in the exact places — so quickly? This movie gets into the evidence of high precision machining on Egypt’s Giza plateau, as well as glyphs of futuristic vehicles within the pyramids. Sure, you’ve seen it all before, but if you’d like to have one voice lecture you for an hour on it while still images get the Ken Burns effect, I can’t stop you, right? You can watch this on Tubi.
Alien Encounters in America: UFOs and Extraterrestrial Visitations: This is where the Ancient Alien Enigma set takes a step away from ancient aliens to tell us all about encounters from the late 40’s to today in America. I learned that a series of UFO encounters are called a flap, which I didn’t know before. Funny enough, the cover of this says “Staggering evidence that we are clearly NOT alone.” and it’s credited to OH Krill, author of Montauk Babies. Krill also directed this movie, so even the way it’s being sold to you is a conspiracy.
Alien Contact Outer Space: Stock footage combines with droning narration to create the kind of movie that I love most, one that somehow brings Tesla, the sound of the planets and numbers stations all into one sprawling narrative that just bombards you with facts. Space probes getting pictures of UFOs? Yeah, that’s in here as well. This is the kind of thing I put on and drop out of reality with, the kind of magic narrative that I wish the world was like instead of the sad cloud of bile that I cough through every day. Normal people will be bored by this. I am not normal.
Top 20 Mind Blowing UFO Cases: Aliens and the Biggest Cover-up in History: This is the same extra that is on the Mill Creek Alien Agenda box set. It was my favorite part of that set, despite it being made with the care of a slideshow. I mean, Jackie Gleason investigating UFOs? Aliens attacking Los Angeles? It moves quick, there isn’t much content beyond some photos, but I had a complete blast.
This set is a lot of fun, so if you’re looking for a lot of info to be smashed into your skull for a low price, Mill Creek is ready to deliver. You can get this from Deep Discount.
Aurora Productions was a film production company established in Hollywood, California in 1978 by Rich Irvine and James L. Stewart, who were former Disney execs. They released six movies, The Secret of NIMH, Heart Like a Wheel, the two Eddie and the Cruisers movies, Maxie and this film, which was the one that ended the studio.
Monroe Clark (C. Thomas Howell) wants to be a lawyer, but he soon meets Zack Barnes (Peter Horton) and Wiley (Christopher Rydell, Trauma) who show him that there’s another way to live your life, a more carefree zen state of beach volleyball. However, Monroe’s uncle Max (Terry Kiser, always the villain, right?) wants to evict the volleyball players. You can imagine how act three of the hero’s journey will play out.
Side Out also has Courtney Throne-Smith; Harley Jane Kozak (The House on Sorority Row); pro volleyball players Randy Stoklos, Sinjin Smith, Craig Moothartm Steve Obradovich, Steve Timmons, Ricci Luyties, Tim Hovland and Mike Dodd; Tony Burton (Duke from Rocky) and Kathy Ireland.
Filmed on some of California’s most popular beach areas, including Hermosa, Zuma and Manhattan beaches, this movie had Horton and Howell being trained by Jon Stevenson, one of the most successful and respected pros in the game of beach volleyball, who acted as the film’s major consultant, volleyball technical adviser and game choreographer.
The final match between Horton and Howell against Stoklos and Smith took six days to film. For Horton, it was the opportunity to live out his dream of playing volleyball for a living, saying “One of the reasons I was attracted to this project was the chance to play volleyball and get paid for it. That’s a scam.”
The script comes from David Thoreau, who mostly wrote for TV, and was directed by Peter Israelson, who mainly made music videos, including Whitney Houston’s “The Greatest Love of All” and Expose’s “Seasons Change.”
Perhaps the strangest thing to me is that this film features “Playing with the Boys” by Kenny Loggins, which also played during the Top Gun volleyball scene, perhaps making that song the unofficial anthem of beach volleyball.
There aren’t many beach volleyball movies — I guess Green Flash and Spiker are the only two that I can remember — so if you’re looking for a film in this very small genre or just want to stare at Horton, well, this is for you.
The Mill Creek blu ray release of Side Out comes in retro VHS packaging and can be bought from Deep Discount.
Ultraman Zero is the son of the legendary Ultra Seven and as an unproven rookie Ultra, he’s been assigned Ultraman Leo to become his master. When the Land of Light is threatened by a troop of monsters and aliens headed by the evil Ultraman Belial — an evil Ultra! — Zero must embrace his heritage and save, well, everything.
Soon, he must battle Alien Batt and Alien Zetton, the Hyper Zetton to save Earth, joining with Ultraman Dyna and Ultraman Cosmos to become Ultraman Saga.
Ultraman Zero: The Chronicle was created by Tsuburaya Productions to commemorate the 50th anniversary of Ultra Seven. It also introduced the characters from the movie Ultraman Orb The Movie, Ultraman Ginga, Ultraman Orb, Ultraman X and Ultraman Orb.
If you recognize some of the footage within the show, that’s because it comes from the Ultraman Zero films, which include Mega Monster Battle: Ultra Galaxy Legends The Movie,Ultra Galaxy Legend Gaiden: Ultraman Zero vs. Darklops Zero, Ultraman Zero The Movie: Super Deciding Fight! The Belial Galactic Empire, Ultraman Saga, Ultraman Zero Gaiden: Killer the Beatstar and Ultraman Retsuden.
It’s a really interesting journey through the history of Ultraman with a literal army of the characters showing up. As a kid, one Ultra would send me into near hyperactive moments of sheer mania. I can only imagine how I would have reacted had I seen this then. I probably would have transformed and found my own Beta Capsule.
I’m so excited that Mill Creek keeps releasing all of this Ultra content. This set is great and the fact that they’re on blu ray means that the quality is stellar. You can get this from Deep Discount.
Someone asked me, “So I’ve never seen a Jess Franco movie. What’s a good one to start with?”
I’m loath to recommend movies to people that haven’t yet built a tolerance for movie drugs. I mean, most Franco is high test black tar heroin movie drugs, films that achieve near murderdrone levels of nothingness balanced with zooms into anatomy that challenge your sanity and synth that seems to drift in the ether like a Spanish fog. Or jazz, maybe?
Also known as Paroxismus, Schwarzer Engel (Black Angel) and Paroxismus – Può una morta rivivere per amore? (Paroxismus – Can a Dead Woman Live Again for Love?), this movie has pretty much nothing to do with the novel by Leopold von Sacher-Masoch other than character names.
Imagine if Vertigo was made by a Hitchcock that wanted to see nudity. Lost Highway by a Lynch that liked trumpet blaring bleats and slow motion. And then, you’re somewhat close, but still have to contend with the fact that at times, it seems like Franco hasn’t even seen another movie before, much less made one, except this time that works and this is as close to perfect as he gets, as if a thousand mustached Lina Romay obsessed glasses wearing madmen were all typing in the same room for one thousand years.
You know how some movies have a fight between style and substance? Well, this movie finds substance being submissive and loving when style edges it and treats it bad and calls it names.
Art dealer Percival Kapp (Dennis Price, living in the tax haven of Sark, making movies like Twins of Evil and five movies with Franco), photographer Olga (Margaret Lee, who was in 12 movies with Klaus Kinski and if anyone is getting a better next life or into heaven, it’s probably her for dealing with that) and depraved and devious playboy Admed (the maniac’s maniac, the just mentioned Kinski) have whipped, assaulted and drank the blood of Wanda Reed (Maria Rohm, Eugenie… The Story of Her Journey into Perversion) and leave her for dead on a beach where trumpet player Jimmy Logan (James Darren, a former teen idol singer whose song “Addio Mondo Crudele” was a huge hit in Europe; he’s best known as Moondoggie in the Gidget films) can only watch.
So when Wanda washed up on the beach, somehow alive, can we blame Jimmy when he falls for her? Not even Rita (Barbara McNair from They Call Me Mr. Tibbs! and the singer of “Till There Was You” and how did she end up in a Jess Franco movie?; then again, her third husband was killed in a mob hit and she got busted for heroin once at a Playboy Club, no judgment) can take his mind off of her, but when you see a nude woman gliding through reality and murdering people while her own theme song — Manfred Mann! — accompanies her deadly doings.
There are two other Venus In Furs movies — by Joseph Marzano and Massimo Dallamano — but I really think there’s no way they can compare to this. I mean, does a multiple mirror version of an angel of death kill a perverted old man in those films? Empty beaches, rich colors, dead women rising from the sand to kill, baby, kill?
To answer that question at the beginning of all this, this is probably the best Franco movie — well, I can also make an argument for Vampyros Lesbos — there is. At the end of it, I got really emotional and just spent and was like one of those cartoony critics clapping in a basement room all by myself shouting “Cinema!” while tears streamed down my face.
A criminal organization somewhere in the Canary Islands with friends in high places is kidnapping famous women and selling them to their fans, which is pretty much the most illegal and immoral version of OnlyFans ever.
Who can stop them?
Two dancers — actually Two Female Spies with Flowered Panties — with the names of Cecile (Lina Romay) and Brigitte (Nadine Pascal) who are currently in prison, but the police ask them if they’d like to solve the case.
If all this movie gives you is Lina in high heels and a gold bikini being chased by a helicopter, is your life so bad?
Also: a magic ring that can hypnotize women.
I’d like to see the script to one of Franco’s movies, because I can only imagine it says, “Diamonds are stolen. Strippers become detectives. Zoom in to honeypot. The end.”
If we are to place our faith in the Jess Franco universe, it’s in the knowledge that there are heroes and there are villains. Regina and Diane would be on the side of good, even if they kind of bumble their way through most of their adventures. From Two Undercover Angels and Kiss Me Monster to Two Spies In Flowered Panties, Franco would return to these lady agents more than once.
Franco’s second movie, this has the detective duo seeking stolen diamonds — yes, this happens all the time in Franco Earth — and hey, if the men can’t solve it, they sure can.
This is way more chaste — understatement — than any of the Franco movies to follow. But it’s infused with some of his loves, like jazz, gorgeous dancing women and noir. It’s a good start and perhaps, at some point soon enough, there will come a break with reality, the discovery of a muse and the knowledge that you can really zoom a camera when you want to.
EDITOR’S NOTE: The third Red Lips movie was originally on our site on April 27, 2020. Stay tuned — we’re going to try to get to all of them this month.
If the last film — Two Undercover Angels — made no sense, guess what? This one doubles down, almost a stream of consciousness film made up of murders, jazz clubs, stripteases, our girls play saxophones and near-escapes.
The sell copy for this claims, “Stiffs, Satanists and Sapphic sadists all after a secret formula for human clones!”
Maybe it’s the fact that I watched Jess Franco movies one after another and pounded what’s left of my brain into putty, but I loved every single minute of this movie.
Also known as Castle of the Doomed, it feels like Franco ran out of ideas here and just decided to have more things happen to the point that continuity and plot became the contrivances that lesser people try to bring up as necessary elements for a movie.
Nope. Not to Jess Franco.
Knife throwing clones? Evil lesbians? Good lesbians? Satanic murderers? Yeah. It’s got all that and an ending that doesn’t solve anything.
The failure of this movie would bring an end to the girls’ adventures until 1999’s Red Silk, although you can perhaps consider Two Female Spies with Flowered Panties a spiritual side quest.
But I think you should only watch a few Jess Franco movies in a row if you want to survive. And my head is already throbbing.
Also note: Two Undercover Angels had a monster in it. Kiss Me Monster has no monster.
Somewhere in there is a koan that will change your life.
EDITOR’S NOTE: I think this movie is where Franco — on April 26, 2020 — won me over. Yeah, it’s a goofy movie, but I sure fell in love with it.
Also known as Sadist Erotica, The Case of the Two Beauties, Two Avenging Angelsand Red Lips Sadisterotica, this mindblast from Jess Franco is kinda sorta a Eurospy movie, but you get the feeling that Mr. Franco just wants to get to the choking and nudity and whipping and forget whatever minor plot there is.
Basically: two lesbian detectives are trying to find criminals, so they themselves pose as a supercriminal named Red Lips (this goes back to Franco’s second movie, Red Lips, which was before Bondmania). The police have no idea and the tone of the films go from swinging fun and humor to outright brutality with no warning whatsoever.
I have no idea if I can explain what happens in this movie, which starts with an attractive brunette — Franco loved his brunettes, so get ready — being ripped to shreds by a werewolf man while a rich guy named Klaus Thiller watches and paints it all.
Then Red Lips steals a painting and we learn that the two lesbians, the blonde Regina (Rosanna Yanni, Count Dracula’s Great Love) and redhead Diana (Janine Reynaud, The Case of the Scorpion’s Tail) wear the mask and outfit when it suits them.
So yeah. The girls get hired to find someone that Thiller probably killed, they sleep with every man around them and yet still wind up with one another. Also: every few minutes, just when things threaten to get boring, there’s a go go dancing scene filled with nudity and blaring music.
This movie made no sense and I loved it for that reason. You might hate it. Who can say?
A couple of weeks ago on the Drive-In Asylum Double Feature, Bill, Gigi and I were discussing why there weren’t more disco-based slasher movies. Sure, disco died — or so they say, but it never went away and we all know and love this — during Disco Demolition Night on Thursday, July 12, 1979 in Chicago.
That said — Halloween came out in 1978 and disco-based films were still coming out as late as 1980. So why didn’t the slasher genre create more disco-based films?
Here are the few that are agreed upon disco slashers. Can you think of any other ones? We’d appreciate finding more!
Keep in mind — we’re not discussing rave movies or just movies set in nightclubs. And no, even though Phantasm has a flying silver ball, it’s not a disco slasher. Carrie has a disco ball too, but I just don’t think it belongs. This would also write off movies like Hellraiser III, Terminatorand Blade. Nightclubs and raves don’t count.
Prom Night: Perhaps the most well-known of all the few disco slashers, Prom Night came out in 1980, just at the time that there was that strange disco backlash. There’s a story that this movie was shot with the actors dancing to tracks by Gloria Gaynor, Donna Summer, France Joli and Pat Benatar, but according to composer Paul Zaza, the publishing rights to the songs were larger than the budget of a Canadian tax shelter slasher could afford.
According to the documentary The Horrors of Hamilton High: The Making of Prom Night, producer Peter Simpson had Zaza xerox those songs and do slightly different remixes of them for use in the movie. The resulting $10 million dollar copyright lawsuit was settled for $50,000.
The soundtrack was released — originally — only in Japan and the music made its way into other Zaza-scored movies like Ghostkeeper and Curtains.
Don’t Go in the House: With a psychopath who falls asleep listening to loud music on headphones finds himself leaving the safety of rock and roll for the sped up cocaine beats of disco, you can only imagine that the least of his sins is throwing a candle at a young dancer’s hairspray filled coif, an act that barely gets her friends to stop doing the hustle.
A truly mean spirited blast of sheer degeneracy — and therefore everything wonderful about the slasher form — Don’t Go In the House has songs like “Boogie Lightning,” “Dancin’ Close to You,” “Straight Ahead” and “Late Night Surrender” playing in between moments of women being set ablaze and a mother rotting somewhere in a house that has an impossibly huge torture chamber in the basement.
Bloody Moon: Leave it to Jess Franco to embrace not only the slasher, but disco. Throbbing beats play over a poolside disco party, killers with ruined faces, incest, bladesaw butchery, kids getting hit by cars and roller disco. It’s one of those slashers that you keep on saying, “Surely there’s no way they’ll take things this far,” and then Franco says, “I’m actually kind of feeling restrained by this movie and you should see when I really go for it.”
Discopath: While made more than 25 years after the other examples on this list, this is all about a New York fast food cook who goes into a trance killing statue — murderdrone? — whenever he hears disco. After a series of killings, he runs to Montreal and begins wearing special clothing that cuts out sound and makes him almost deaf. But when a surprise disco party at the school where he works as an audio-visual tech goes down, the rage comes back.
House on the Edge of the Park: Before their night of psychosexual madness, Alex and Ricky were planning on going to the disco. So when a disco party breaks out in Gloria’s house and she humiliates Ricky by making him strip and drink, is it any wonder that Alex remembers he’s David Hess and takes over the party, beating people, tying them up and pissing all over them?
Riz Ortolani is seriously astounding, the only music man I can think of that would pair cannibals impaling someone from ass to mouth with a gorgeous sad song. So beyond Cannibal Holocaust, the songs “Sweetly” and “Do It to Me” in this movie just flat out get me ready for the strobe light.
Eyes of Laura Mars: Alright, this might be more disco giallo than disco slasher, but go with us for this. KC & the Sunshine Band and Odyssey are on the soundtrack, so that’s more than enough to qualify this for the list.
Actually, this is totally a disco slasher because beyond the music, disco is all about fashion. And this movie, well, it is fashion. It’s a movie that I want more people to see and appreciate, as it has some really wild moments.
I’ve debated including The Disco Exorcist, but it’s not a slasher. Climax has some great dancing scenes and death as well, but it feels too EDM. Cruising is more punk rock and BDSM and murder mystery than slasher. Fright Night is more nightclub than disco. And Murder Rock feels more Flashdance than Can’t Stop the Music.
The sad fact is that there should be so many more disco slashers. Hopefully, you can think of a few more and put them in the comments.
Finally — something fun that I found as I was writing this:
Spacetoonz are awesome — making DJ video mixtapes of some of our favorite horror movies. Their new mix — Bloody Disco Balls — has a preview on Vimeo and you can buy it now from Diabolik DVD.
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