BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Barracuda (1978)
Barracuda accomplishes a miracle. It goes from a movie that bored me senseless at the beginning to one that had me riveted at the end. That’s a pretty incredible feat. It’s also a time capsule of the post-Watergate emotions of 1978 while also taking huge bits out of the script for Jaws. Now, compared to piranhas, great […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Cruel Jaws (1995)
Cruel Jaws has been released as Jaws 5 in many countries. It has nothing to do with the Jaws series of films other than ripping off footage from the first three films, as well as Deep Blood and The Last Shark. In fact, it goes so far to be Jaws that it rips off Hooper’s dialogue about what we know […]
Slay Belles (2018)
Paul Andolina from Wrestling with Film is back with another holiday film. Let’s all get ready for candy canes by reading this one. With Christmas only days away, I haven’t seen much snow in Pennsylvania. Granted winter doesn’t officially start until the 21st of the month but I’m used to seeing some snow on the […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Piranha 3DD (2012)
After the events of the last Piranha film, where Lake Victoria was attacked by prehistoric killer fish that were continuing to evolve, the lake has drained and the town itself has been abandoned. But what if there were a new waterpark that could drum up tourism? That’d be cool, right? At another lake, two farmers (Gary […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Night of the Sharks (1988)
One would imagine that by now, I wouldn’t be snowed by a great poster. But nope. This Italian-Spanish-Mexican film is proof that if the poster looks awesome and has sharks murdering people, I will ignore all the warning flags and dive right into a movie that lulls me into a fugue state of sheer pain. David […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: The Meg (2018)
Is it a stretch to believe that the maker of this giant shark movie also directed 3 Ninjas, While You Were Sleeping and Cool Runnings? I guess anyone can make anything and Jon Turteltaub lives up to that. But we’re here to talk sharks. And this flick has a big one — a 75-foot long megalodon, a prehistoric shark […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: The Shark Hunter (1979)
Enzo G. Castellari gets plenty of love around these parts. After all, he brought us 1990: The Bronx Warriors, Escape from the Bronx and Warriors of the Wasteland, amongst others. Of course, we already covered his Jaws Xerox that is The Last Shark this week, but that’s not the only shark movie he made. And get this — he’s bringing […]
3615 Code Père Noël (1989)
Straight up, let me be honest. This movie is crazy. I say that a lot in conversations about movies that defy description. I may exclaim, this movie is insane. It’s bonkers. I may use all manner of words. Let me tell you, when it comes to Christmas movies, nothing will prepare you for this. Let […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Piranha 3D (2010)
Alexandre Aja may have announced his horror career with High Tension, but he’s really been known for his remakes of classic films, like directing The Hills Have Eyes and writing and producing Maniac. Here, he presents a much more satiric take on undersea terror, along with a cast game for pure silliness at times. It all starts with Richard […]
BASTARD PUPS OF JAWS: Grizzly (1976)
From 1972 to 1978, William Girder directed nine feature films and would have probably never stopped, were it not for the helicopter crash that took his life while scouting Philippines filming locations. From Asylum of Satan and Three on a Meathook to The Manitou, Sheba Baby and Project: Kill, his films may have been derivative but they made money. […]
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