EDITOR’S NOTE: Young Frankenstein was on USA Up All Night on October 31, 1992.

I was two years old, and my parents went to see this on a date together, and I remember being sad that I couldn’t go. Even at that young age, I loved monsters. As I’ve grown up, this movie has become a regular part of my family. We would often talk about it and watch it every time it was on TV. When I got my parents a DVD player, this was one of the movies I bought with it for them.

Directed by Mel Brooks, who co-wrote it with star Gene Wilder, this is the kind of movie that requires little introduction. But wow, you have Wilder, Peter Boyle as the monster, a perfect Marty Feldman as Igor, Cloris Leachman in charge of the castle, Teri Garr, Madelaine Kahn and Brooks himself. It’s, well, perfect.

Brooks said, “I was in the middle of shooting the last few weeks of Blazing Saddles somewhere in the Antelope Valley, and Gene Wilder and I were having a cup of coffee, and he said, ‘I have this idea that there could be another Frankenstein.” I said, “Not another! We’ve had the son of, the cousin of, the brother-in-law. We don’t need another Frankenstein.” His idea was straightforward: “What if the grandson of Dr. Frankenstein wanted nothing to do with the family whatsoever? “He was ashamed of those wackos. I said, “That’s funny.””

It’s great because even if you don’t know the monster movies to the level that geeks like me do, it’s still funny. But if you do, there’s so much more.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Uncle Buck was on USA Up All Night on January 2, 1998.

Directed and written by John Hughes, the first film of his deal with Universal, this has Bob and Cindy Russell (Garrett M. Brown and Elaine Bromka) called away by a medical emergency and Bob’s brother Buck (John Candy) being placed in charge of their kids, Tia (Jean Louisa Kelly), Maizy (Gaby Hoffman) and Miles (Macaulay Culkin). They’re worried, because all Buck really does is smoke, drink and gamble. Yet as you can imagine, he learns about why family is important while improving their lives (and fixing his relationship with Chanice (Amy Madigan)).

But really, it’s a whole movie to remind you why you loved John Candy so much.

Culkin remembered and told People Magazine, “I think he always had that really great instinct. I think he saw. Listen, even before the wave crested and the Home Alone stuff was happening, it was not hard to see how difficult my father was. It was no secret. He was already a monster.

Candy would ask, “Is everything alright over there? Are you doing well? Good day? Everything’s alright? Everything good at home?”

It’s important that I remember that. I remember John caring when not a lot of people did.”

Sometimes, I get a bit choked up thinking about him, and I never really knew him. I know it’s weird, but that’s how it is.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Major League was on USA Up All Night on January 9, 1998.

David S. Ward wrote The Sting and Sleepless In Seattle, which makes me rethink that this is just a silly movie and made by people who maybe loved the game. He also directed King Ralph, Down Periscope and the sequel to this.

Rachel Phelps (Margaret Whitton) is a Vegas showgirl who came to Cleveland with the rich man she married. He dies, she’s stuck here with the team, but if they play poorly, she can move them anywhere. So she makes the Indians the worst team in baseball, yet one that comes together to become winners.

A few years ago, I wrote “Ten players on my movie All-Star team (yes, including the DH)” and pitcher Ricky Vaughn (Charlie Sheen), third baseman Roger Dorn (Corbin Bernsen), Center Fielder Willie “Mays” Hayes (Wesley Snipes), Manager Lou Brown (James Gammon), Clu Haywood (real life pitcher Pete Vuckovich), Right Fielder Pedro Cerrano (Dennis Haysbert, before he was the President) and Catcher Jake Taylor (Tom Berenger) all made the team.

I can’t believe I got this far before saying that the general manager of the team, Charlie Donovan, is Charles Cyphers, Sheriff Lee Brackett. And hey, Rene Russo is in it too.

Ward grew up in the Cleveland suburb of South Euclid, Ohio and said, “I figured I would never see the Indians win anything unless I wrote a movie where they did. That was the real genesis behind the movie.” But then the movie was shot in Milwaukee.

Throughout the movie, each win gets a piece of paper with a nude image of Phelps. However, in the original cut, she picked thewhole  team and was really on their side. Test audiences liked her better as a bad girl.

Could anyone really play? Well, Sheen pitched in high school and did steroids for two months, which gave him an 88 MPH fastball. And yeah, Bob Uecker really played. His line, “Just a bit outside,” has entered the words of nearly every baseball announcer.

Major League was made into and released as a video game, developed by Lenar and published by Irem, exclusively in Japan. That’s crazy!

EDITOR’S NOTE: Footloose was on USA Up All Night on September 15 and December 23, 1995.

Herbert Ross (The Owl and the Pussycat, Steel Magnolias) is directing, Dean Pitchford (the co-writer of “You Should Hear How She Talks About You”) is writing, and America is loving it. Imagine — a town where no music is allowed. How can it be! How could a lack of the First Amendment ever happen in our country?

Ren McCormack (Kevin Bacon) and his mother Ethel (Frances Lee McCain) have come from Chicago to Bomont, Utah. Here, Reverend Shaw Moore (John Lithgow) runs the town, keeping kids like Willard (Chris Penn), Rusty (Sarah Jessica Parker), Woody (John Laughlin), Lulu (Lynne Marta) and his own daughter Ariel (Lori Singer) from dancing.

Ariel’s brother died after a night of drinking and dancing, which is how we got here. So can this city kid come to town and change it all? Of course.

This was almost a Michael Cimino movie, but even after Heaven’s Gate, he had considerable demands. There’s also a world where Tom Cruise or Christopher Atkins was the lead, while Madonna, Haviland Morris, Valerie Bertinelli or Jennifer Jason Leigh would be the love interest.

This is loosely based on a real-life movie story. The town of Elmore City, Oklahoma, had no dancing since its founding. Rev. F. R. Johnson said, “No good has ever come from a dance. If you have a dance, somebody will crash it, and they’ll be looking for only two things — women and booze. When boys and girls hold each other, they get sexually aroused. You can believe what you want, but one thing leads to another.” In 1980, the students of Elmore City’s high school made national news when they requested permission to hold a junior prom. The school board was tied at 2–2 when President Raymond Lee said, “Let ’em dance.”

If you were alive when this came out — I was 12 — you know the songs: “Footloose” by Kenny Loggins, “Let’s Hear It for the Boy” by Deniece Williams, “Almost Paradise” by Heart’s Ann Wilson and Loverboy’s Mike Reno, “Holding Out for a Hero” by Bonnie Tyler, and so many more. Writer Dean Pitchford did more than the script. He also co-wrote the songs.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Deathstalker II was on USA Up All Night on March 11, 1994 and November 18, 1995.

John Terlesky replaces Rick Hill as the Deathstalker and he doesn’t really have the look that Boris Vallejo envisions on the box art for this one. And because Jim Wynorski is directing, you know you’re going to get exactly what you expect out of a sword and sorcery Roger Corman movie: breasts, boobs, bazooms and a few beasts. Maybe some blood if you’re lucky. And perhaps some more sweater meat.

Princess Evie of Jzafir (Monique Gabrielle, Penthouse Pet of the Year for December 1982) has been taken away from her rightful throne by Jarek (John LaZar, Z-Man from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls!) and Sultana (Toni Naples, who shows up in Chopping Mall and Sorceress) and replaced by a clone.

So Evie takes on the secret identity of Reena the Seer and hires Deathstalker to get her kingdom back. They have plenty of adventures — yay! — and maybe even fall in love — aww! — before the end of the film.

Look for Queen Kong from GLOW as the Amazon champion Gorgo in a wrestling scene, if you enjoy that sort of thing.

Is Deathstalker II better than the original? No. It’s pretty stupid. But isn’t that what you’re really coming to these movies for? It’s definitely entertaining and a great escape from reality, though.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Cheerleader Camp was on USA Up All Night on February 28 and September 12, 1992; May 15, October 15, November 19 and December 10, 1993; May 7, December 9 and 30, 1994; January 4 and July 18, 1997.

You know, if I had my way, Betsy Russell would have been a much bigger star. I mean, she’s done well and is remembered — and got to be in the Saw movies and get a whole new audience — but she deserved better than a movie that forces us to watch Leif Garrett make sweet love to Playboy Playmate for April 1986 and adult star Teri Weigel. Nothing against Teri — she’s also in Predator 2, Marked for Death, Innocent Blood and was the first Playboy girl to go into adult, which cost her a lot in her personal and professional life.

Making this movie work even harder for me? The appearance of Cannon Films star — I mean, she was in Breakin’, Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo and Ninja 3: The Domination — Lucinda Dickey. Also — Taleena from the Gor movies — and June 1986 Playmate of the Month — Rebecca Ferratti, George “Buck” Flower and Tom Habeeb, who would one day host the show Cheaters.

Based on the death of Kirsten Costas — just like the original Tori Spelling Lifetime movie Death of a Cheerleader — this movie is a paper-thin slasher that came in seven years after its expiration date and led to a sequel that’s not a sequel, the Russell feature — and yes, Buck Flower shows up again — Camp Fear.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Can’t Buy Me Love was on USA Up All Night on May 29 and December 25, 1992; December 25, 1993; October 6, 1995; July 6 and November 22, 1996.

I cut grass from 15 to 25 years old, and that’s how I put myself through college and even made extra money once I started my advertising career. I certainly would not have used the money I made to save for a telescope or to date the popular girl in school like Ronald Miller (Patrick Dempsey).

The girl next door of his dreams, cheerleader Cindy Mancini (Amanda Peterson, whose career and life didn’t go as brightly as this movie would seem to make me think that they would), has wrecked her mother’s new suede dress, so she agrees to be his girlfriend for a month for the sum of $1,000.

This is the kind of movie that makes me hate the second act of the three-act structure. Ronald gets popular, gets rid of his old friends and even turns on Cindy. She thought they were in love, and he probably did as well, but no one knows how to connect. He’s already hanging out with her friends instead of Malachi and Seth Green, but isn’t that the way these things always go.

Director Steve Rash started his career making movies like The Buddy Holly Story and Under the Rainbow, and now makes direct-to-video sequels to the American Pie, Road Trip and Bring It On films.

So yeah. In the 80s, a tender romantic comedy about making young women into prostitutes was the kind of thing we saw as romance. Weird, huh?