CBS LATE MOVIE MONTH: Trog (1970)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Welcome to an entire month of movies that played on the CBS Late Movie. Up first, Trog! This film played four times in the middle of the night on the Tiffany Network: February 24, 1972; May 30, 1972; September 14, 1973 and December 6, 1974.

Trog makes me sad. Beyond the fact that it feels a lot like King Kong or Son of Konga doomed monster from our past that just can’t survive in today’s horrible modern world—it’s also depressing at times to watch Joan Crawford act her heart out in a film where no one else can come close to her power.

That’s not to say this is a bad film. It’s delightful and well-directed by genre vet Freddie Francis (Tales from the Crypt and plenty of other wonderful Amicus portmanteau films). It’s also quick-moving and enjoyable.

But it’s still sad.

A troglodyte (TROG!) is found alive in the caves of England. Dr. Brockton (Crawford) has had some success communicating with him and sees him as the missing link. However, her neighbors do not like her having a monster in her house, mainly after it kills a dog when it steals his ball.

Local businessman Sam Murdock (Michael Gough, who appeared in many Hammer films and as Alfred in the 1980s and 1990s Batman films) worries that the creature will negatively impact local businesses. But he really has an issue with a woman being in charge.

Meanwhile, Trog undergoes multiple surgeries, which enable him to learn to communicate. In a trippy sequence, we see into his mind, which is filled with memories of the Ice Age and dinosaurs.

The court upholds Dr. Brockton’s goal of teaching Trog, so Murdock sneaks in and lets him loose. He kills several people, including the businessman, before taking a little girl and retreating to his cave. Dr. Brockton can communicate with Trog, and the girl goes free. Meanwhile, soldiers open fire on our titular caveperson, and he falls to his death, impaled on a stalagmite.

As Dr. Brockton leaves in tears, a reporter tries to interview her. She has no comment as she wanders away.

See? Depressing.

Due to the film’s low budget, Crawford used her own clothes. And it shows. She’s a beacon of fashion in a grimy town. She stands out like no one else. And speaking of suits, the one for Trog was left over from 2001: A Space Odyssey!

This was Crawford’s final film, but I don’t believe the TV show Feud: Bette and Joan. She’d continue to act afterward, appearing in an episode of TV’s The Sixth Sense called Dear Joan: We’re Going to Scare You to Death. If you’ve ever listened to My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult, that’s where the sample on the song “A Daisy Chain for Satan Comes From.”

PS: I would know none of this were it not for Bill from Groovy Doom.

I’m glad I watched Trog. But the sad ending — and thinking of Joan changing in her car during the breaks in filming — make me a little misty-eyed. That said, it’s one of John Waters’ favorite films, so there’s that.

Chattanooga Film Festival Red Eye #8: Silver Slime (1981), Killing Spree (1984) and Possibly In Michigan (1983)

Silver Slime (1981):

Christopher Gans has made some great movies and gets little credit. His better-than-the-game Silent HillCrying Freeman, his segments in Necronomicon and the incredible Brotherhood of the Wolf are among his many accomplishments.

As a student, he made this film, which pays tribute to Bava, complete with a dedication at the end. And you know, in just around 15 minutes, Gans gets it. He understands how giallo works, and instead of making the kind of modern Giallo that everyone tries these days, he crafts a film that looks bad with love and then goes forward, taking what works and creating a near-lunatic energy that feels like where you’d hoped Argento would have kept going after Tenebre and Opera.

Only two actors are credited: Aissa Djabri as Le témoin (the witness) and Isabelle Wendling as La victim (the victim). Like all Giallo directors of ill repute, one must assume that Gans is the killer or at least their hands.

Phillipe Gans and Jean-François Torrès created the music for this, and much like the visuals, it takes the sound of the form and makes it more hard-driving and powerful, while Jérôme Robert has gone on to plenty of work in the French film industry.

This just knocked me out.

You can watch this on YouTube.

Folies Meurtrières (Killing Spree) (1984): Shot on Super 8 at some time in the early 80s in France, this film is 52 minutes of a killer aimlessly killing, killing and killing some more while a fuzzed-out synth soundtrack plays, the kind of music that those that say their films are “inspired by John Carpenter” but just have a neon color palette and a few keyboard songs on the soundtrack dream and wish and hope and pray that they could achieve.

Then everything changes.

And by changes, I mean the end of Maniac gets ripped off.

Look, I get it, this is a cheap knockoff of a slasher that may be bright enough to make fun of the things we accept in these films. But man, I love these lo-fi movies that want nothing more than to make their own effects and do their best to entertain you. They’re not significant movies — they were never intended to be — but they were a lot of fun to make.

I’ve heard that this movie is in the genre Murderdrone, in which “90% of the movie is people wandering around and getting murdered set to shitty lo-fi bedroom synths, and it’s increasingly hard to pay attention, but you can’t look away, and you’re stuck in a murdertrance.” This Letterboxd list has some more of those…

As for the man who made this, Antoine Pellissier, he’s a doctor now.

Possibly In Michigan (1983): Made with funding from the National Endowment for the Arts and the Ohio Arts Council, video artist Cecelia Condit’s nightmarish short has had many lives: as an art project to help her heal from her past, as a scare tactic shown on the 700 Club and as a viral video that got shared without context and was rumored to be a cursed film.

Starting with her film Beneath the Skin, Condit uses her video work to attempt to deal with the cycles of violence that she felt were all around her and so close to her. That’s because, for a year, she dated Ira Einhorn, the Unicorn Killer, who was also one reason we had Earth Day. The entire time that they dated, the rotting body of his ex-girlfriend, Holly Maddux, was in a trunk. A trunk that Condit constantly walked past, one assumes.

It made it onto religious television because, in addition to examiningt the self-destructive behaviors of men toward women, it alsoexaminest female friendships and love.The lead characters, Sharon and Janice, may be a couple, or they may just be supportive women. Or both. Who are we to put any bounds on their relationship?

It’s become a viral sensation several times, as teens try to copy its strange musical numbers and send it to one another as a curse straight out of The Ring.

Our ladies are just trying to shop for perfume — this was shot at Beachwood Place in Beachwood, Ohio, where Condit sat outside the building manager’s office until she was allowed to shoot there; she was given twenty-minute blocks of time, which was a challenge — when Arthur begins to stalk them, a man whose face changes with a series of latex masks.

Arthur is the kind of Prince Charming who shows his love to women by hacking them to pieces; his always-changing face is a way of showing the roles that abusive men have taken in their relationships. We also discover that Sharon is attracted to violent men but also likes making them think that violence is their idea. Regardless, love should never cost an arm and a leg.

The songs, written and performed by Karen Skladany (who also plays Janice), are insidious in the way that they worm their way into your brain. This is the kind of weirdness that is completely authentic in a way that today’s manufactured social media creepypasta weirdness cannot even hope to be a faint echo of.

As frightening as this can be, it’s also a film about absorbing — eating a cannibal is one way, right? — and getting past the worst moments of life without being destroyed by them. This also lives up to so much of what I love about SOV in that while we’ve been taught that the 80s looked neon and sounded like a Carpenter movie, the truth is that the entire decade was beige and sounded like the demo on a Casio keyboard. This doesn’t nail an aesthetic as much as document the actual 1983 that I lived within, minus the shape-changing cannibal and singsong happy tale of a dog in the microwave.

Consider this absolutely essential and one of the most critical SOV movies ever.

The Chattanooga Film Festival is happening now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies, click here. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Chattanooga Film Festival Red Eye #6: Club Life (1987)

Norman Thaddeus Vane lived a life.

After an early conversion from Judaism to Roman Catholicism, a year in the Merchant Marine and two years in the Air Force, he attended Columbia University on the G.I. Bill.

After graduation, his first play, The Penguin, opened Off-Broadway with Martin Landau in the cast and received rave reviews—reviews that eluded his Broadway debut, Harbor Lights. He then spent the next two decades in London, where he wrote and directed Conscience Bay and The Fledglings when he wasn’t running nightclubs—one of which he sold to the Krays—and contributing to Penthouse.

He also married 16-year-old Sarah Caldwell when he was nearly forty, which formed the basis of his script for Lola (AKA Twinky AKA London Affair), a movie in which Susan George stands in for his wife — his wife did act in his film Mrs. Brown, You’ve Got a Lovely Daughter — and Charles Bronson basically played him.

As the seventies began, he wrote the Italian film 1931: Once Upon a Time in New York, AKA Pete, Pearl & the Pole, which had Tony Anthony as Pete, Adolfo Celi as the Pole and Lucretia Love as the Pearl. He also wrote the Native Americansploitation film — is there a genre? — Shadow of the Hawk stars Jan-Michael Vincent, Marilyn Hassett and Chief Dan George.

Somewhere in the middle of the 70s, he shot the second unit on the adult horror comedy Dracula Sucks, which would serve him well when he made the mainstream Frightmare, a movie that has references to the Universal Dracula.

Perhaps his most interesting film is 1984’s The Black Room, which Vane revealed to Nightmare USA based on his real life, as he cheated on his wife in his black room with Penthouse centerfolds that he met while working at that publication. It’s also the only movie I’ve ever seen where a man rents a sex room from a brother and sister-couple who may or may not be vampires.

The last few movies of Vane’s career are hit and miss: Midnight, in which he was unhappy with the final cut, which was taken from him; Taxi Dancers, a sex film shot in the same nightclub used for Club Life and You’re So Dead, made when Vane was 79 years old and never shown, as far as I know.

Vane wrote an op-ed for the Los Angeles Times in 1991 in which he confessed to how hard agism had hit him, saying, “After being dropped by William Morris some years ago, I managed to sell several scripts to studios. But in recent years, the wall has been impenetrable. Instead of disappearing, I decided to write, produce and direct low-budget, independent features.”

If you want to know more, the incredible Hidden Films was lucky enough to interview Vane before he died in 2015.

But hey — we’re here to talk about Club Life.

Cal (Tom Parsekian) is a kid from a small town with dreams of Hollywood stardom. His journey takes him to The City, a nightclub owned by the coked-out Hector (Tony Curtis), who is in debt to organized crime but also loves to watch his wife Tilly (Dee Wallace) sing. Cal’s Hollywood dream leads him to become a bouncer, learning from the seasoned Tank (Michael Parks). The film features a unique scene where Tank effortlessly dodges every move Cal makes, leading to a moment of shared laughter and pain.

The girl Cal left behind, Sissy (Jamie Barrett), has come to Los Angeles looking for him, but she falls into a bad crowd at the same time as Cal leaving behind The City, as he comes to work at a lesbian bar called Different Drummer. Sissy also sings, and her number “First Class Man” gets her both booed off the stage at the ladies-only club and also catcalled.

This movie is awash in neon and fog. It also has one of the most fantastic sex scenes ever, as Cal and Sissy work it out on a clear waterbed lit from the inside and filled with fish. This is the movie that proves to you that you haven’t seen everything.

It’s not done yet.

After Tank gets killed, during which one of the tough guys says, “The cat can’t sleep if he wants to breathe.” Cal returns to The City and tries to keep Hector safe from all his debts. Did I mention that Cal can also dance? Or that he uses — and here’s the part that might be better than the waterbed filled with sea life — neon nunchucks that get a slow-motion dance fight scene that blew my brains out my nose.

This is a movie filled with strange BDSM fog-enhanced dancing set to music by Frank Musker (who is credited on the Stardust song “Music Sounds Better with You” thanks to a sample it contains from the song “Fate” that he did with Chaka Khan), Michael Sembello (the Flashdance force is strong within this) and Terry Shaddick (who co-wrote Olivia Newton-John’s “Physical”).

Smiley-faced balloons intrude on breakups, graffiti clowns watch over overdoses, and a funeral happens inside a nightclub. It’s also shot by Joel King, whose resume includes camera work on Just Before DawnThe BeastmasterCarrieOut of the Blue and Embrace of the Vampire. That should give you an idea that this movie looks everywhere. As for the wild dance numbers were choreographed by Dennon Rawles, who also worked on Voyage of the Rock Aliens and Staying Alive.

Also, Kristine DeBell shows up, and again, her career has some wild choices, from Meatballs and the erotic Alice in Wonderland to playing Jackie Chan’s love interest in The Big Brawl to being in A Talking Cat!?!

This film ends as only it can. Cal smashes the hall of mirrors where his friend Tank died and basically decimates the entire club with his neon nunchucks. He then splits the disco ball and throws his brightly colored martial arts weapon over the Hollywood hills.

You best believe I was crying.

PS: Norman Thaddeus Vane was not paid for the movie, and when it was nearly finished, he stole the film itself. He told Hidden Films, ” The movie was being edited at Consolidated Film Industries, and I went over and stole these really heavy cans of negatives and put them in the cellar of a friend’s house. And then I told our representative, “Listen, tell Guy Collins that I’m not giving the negatives back until I get some serious money.”  They called the police and I said to them, “I’ve been working for this company for three months and I haven’t been paid dollar one. I’m holding the negative as a lien against the money they owe me by contract.” The police took my side. Guy’s brother came over and paid me $40,000  and said he’d owe me another $40-50,000, but I never got it.”

You can watch this on YouTube or download it from the Internet Archive.

You can listen to the podcast I did on this movie on YouTube.

Chattanooga Film Festival: Mrs. Booker on 8th Avenue (2023)

Florence Booker (played by Daniella Alma) is a character that many can relate to, as she navigates the complex feelings of isolation that often accompany marriage. Despite being in a relationship, she feels more alone than ever before. Her life takes an unexpected turn when she shares a cigarette with Roy (Nicholas Baroudi), a charismatic line cook. This seemingly innocent encounter sparks an affair, leading Florence to contemplate abandoning her current life in search of something more fulfilling. However, as she tries to escape her circumstances, she only deepens her sense of incompleteness and confusion.

The film, shot over the course of ten days on the lively streets of New York City by director Alexander Canepa, begins in the middle of Florence’s story, immersing the audience directly into her struggles. As the narrative unfolds, it becomes clear that Florence has a tendency to attract individuals who are emotionally needy, particularly her husband, Louis (David Edwin), who epitomizes this dynamic.

At a film festival often dominated by genre cinema, the presence of a realistic romantic comedy like this may come as a surprise. However, those who appreciate a fresh and nuanced take on relationships will likely find this film captivating and thought-provoking. With its unique blend of humor and heartfelt moments, it challenges the conventions of the genre while offering a genuine exploration of love, longing, and personal fulfillment.

The Chattanooga Film Festival runs from now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Chattanooga Film Festival: New Religion (2022)

Miyabi (Kaho Seto) has lost her daughter when she falls from the balcony, which puts her in a dark place, working as an escort in a basement somewhere with two other women. Sure, she has a new guy, but one of her co-workers — Aiwaza (Daiki Nunami) — loses her mind and kills a whole bunch of people with a knife.

One of Aiwaza’s prize clients — Oka (Satoshi Oka) — now needs someone to take care of his needs, so Miyabi takes over. His needs? He takes photos of women, slowly, strangely and in ways that make them feel like they’re being dissected. Yes, that’s strange. But what’s strange is that his house is either always pitch black or blindingly red. Strange enough? What if he had no vocal cords and now spoke through the sound system of his home at body-rattling volume? And what if, with each photo that Oka takes, Miyabi gets closer to seeing her dead daughter?

Also, none of this could be happening. Or all of it.

Directed and written by Keishi Kondo, this is not a movie to go into hoping for a straight-up horror film. But for those willing to journey toward its heart of darkness, there’s something strange and wonderful here.

The Chattanooga Film Festival is happening now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies, click here. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

The Chattanooga Film Festival is happening now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies, click here. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Chattanooga Film Fest: The Last Movie Ever Made (2023)

Directed and written by Nathan Blackwell, this film presents a captivating and unconventional narrative that delves into friendship, creativity and redemption themes. The story centers on Marshall (portrayed by Adam Rini), who grapples with a profound sense of urgency as the world faces imminent destruction. He is compelled to take bold action with only thirty days left to live, revealed through a mysterious voice in their minds.

In a heartfelt bid to reconnect with his past and find meaning in his final days, Marshall decides to gather a diverse group of friends and acquaintances—among them, his ex-wife Audrey (played by Megan Rini). Together, they embark on the ambitious journey of completing a science fiction film that Marshall and his childhood friends had started but never finished during their high school years.

To assemble his team, Marshall reaches out to his old friends, Lance (played by Ryan Gaumont) and Arthur (portrayed by Craig Curtis), who share his passion for filmmaking. Despite the chaos and uncertainty surrounding them, the trio rekindles their camaraderie and begins to revisit their youthful dreams and aspirations. They channel their collective energy into the creative process, using the act of making the film as a way to confront their fears and desires.

As the narrative unfolds, the film takes on a distinctly uplifting tone, celebrating the transformative power of cinema. Despite the looming threat of the world’s end, Marshall and his friends find joy and purpose in their collaboration. The filmmaking experience becomes not just a project but a therapeutic journey that enables Marshall to confront his past mistakes and grow as an individual.

Throughout the film, there are moments of poignant reflection and humor, showcasing the resilience of the human spirit even in the face of an apocalyptic reality. The camaraderie among the group, combined with their shared commitment to the art of filmmaking, underscores the message that creativity can flourish even in the darkest of times.

Ultimately, this film serves as a testament to the enduring impact of storytelling. It encourages viewers to appreciate the present and find solace in our connections with others. As the narrative reaches its conclusion, the uplifting spirit of the film leaves audiences with a sense of hope, suggesting that while the world may be ending, the legacy of their collective artistry will continue beyond the final frame.

The Chattanooga Film Festival runs from now through June 29. Click here to get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Chattanooga FIlm Festival: The Haunting of Hype House (2023)

On the Seed & Spark site that helped fund this movie, it literally says “The Exorcist convinced the world that Ouija Boards are a dangerous tool that shouldn’t be considered a game, but The Haunting of Hype House wants to make Ouija Boards fun again.”

I mean, as someone who has a list of a few hundred Ouija-based movies, I can agree.

Back in 1969, an unspeakable death took place on a quiet mountainside somewhere around the outskirts of Los Angeles.

Now, Jared Zenith (Matt Farren), a social media star, and his assistant Mike make the vlogs that the internet loves, ones filled with not just pranks but out and out jump scares. Jared’s brother Eric (Michael Salamone) is in town and Jared has some sibling issues to deal with but he’s probably just going to make his brother look like a moron on the internet.

Eric sees something he thinks is an actual supernatural event.

And then out comes the Ouija board.

Farren came up with the idea for this movie in a very simple way: “I came up with this idea THREE YEARS AGO when I thought of one simple question: what if a ghost possessed a really unlikeable guy, and his friends realized they liked the ghost more than their buddy?”

Farren co-directed this with Brandon Douglas and wrote the script. It has some budget issues, sure, but it’s a great idea and the cast is pretty fun. The acting could use a little work, but I can say the same thing for some big budget films.

You can learn more on the official site.

The Chattanooga Film Festival is happening now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies, click here. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Chattanooga Film Festival: Soft Liquid Center (2023)

Co-writer, producer and star Steph Holmbo makes her feature film debut in this film, which has been described as “an enigmatic tale of #MeToo psychological horror inspired by real events.”

Holmbo has decided to share her experiences through “phantasmagoric and supernatural lenses.”

Directed by Perry Home Video and written by Holmbo with Joseph Kolean and Zachary Gutierrez, this has the woman moving out and being on her own, but what seems like a place of respite turns horrific with moments small — a refrigerator inexplicably filled with rotting food — and huge — red light bathing everything.

There’s also a moment where a watermelon pays the price.

Soft Liquid Center may not appeal to everyone — literally it sits in place for some time and just has ambient audio for some parts — but for those who catch the vibe, it may feel just right.

The Chattanooga Film Festival is happening now through June 29. To get your in-person or virtual badge to see any of these movies, click here. For more information, visit chattfilmfest.org and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

TUBI ORIGINAL: Fire Front (2022)

The summer of 2020 was a brutal time for Australia, as bushfires devastated massive areas of the country and record-breaking heat took a toll on its citizens. Thirty-four people across the country died, including several volunteer firefighters who were underfunded and not equipped for what they were facing.

In a world where we still argue whether or not climate change exists, these bushfires should be a wake-up call for what is coming for every single one of us, not just Australia. My eyes sting every time I go outside now thanks to the high air quality index numbers and the moon looks red at night. I never remember this ever happening before and I know it’s not going to get better.

Director and writer Eddie Martin was on the ground for much of this and shows the Black Summer fires in a way that makes you feel as if you were there. There’s a harrowing moment when a woman literally tears her shirt off to rescue a koala on fire and pours bottled water all over it before taking it to a shelter. For all the trauma in this, that hit me the hardest.

You can watch this on Tubi.

TUBI ORIGINAL: Twisted House Sitter 2 (2023)

At the end of Twisted House Sitter, this sequel starts with Alicia (Crystal-Lee Naomi) surviving prison until she fakes a stomach virus that seemingly kills her. I mean, she’s already gotten over being stabbed by a corkscrew at the end of the first movie.

Prison doctor Tyler (David Vaughn) has set up a drug that just makes it look like she was dead. He promised her Florida and gives her Nebraska, so she gives him the slip.

Now, our twisted house sitter is looking for a new target.

First, she tracks down her sister Loren (Tesh Wright). Sorry, adopted sister. Turns out that Alicia grew up in an orphanage and Loren wants nothing to do with her, keeping her distance since she went to college. Alicia, however, has been stalking her through social media and wants her help in getting a job. Instead, she shoves her sister down the steps, gets a makeover and becomes Loren.

Loren had a good job lined up as the assistant to Pamela (Vivica A. Fox) and Marcus (Jermaine Rivers). The co-owners of a skin care line, they are exactly who Alicia/Loren want to be, so she systematically takes over their lives while in the midst of a nerve-wracking stock IPO. She goes from spiking wine spritzers to serving laced tea to even setting Pamela up to run over her prison boyfriend.

By the end, she has exactly what she wants and Pamela is in the same jail cell that Loren once was confined within. But she soon learns that her new cellmate was also Loren’s (there are so many levels of coincidence here that I can’t even comprehend them) and she has a plan to get back what’s hers.

Director Courtney Miller made the first film, while writer Dana Werde also wrote another Tubi original, Safe Word. Here’s hoping that beyond the third film that we get a crossover between Alicia, Zooey from The Stepmother and David from Surprise and there’s an actual Tubi Streaming Universe.

You can watch this on Tubi.