EDITOR’S NOTE: St. Helens was on the CBS Late Movie on January 13, May 31 and July 5, 1988.

Directed by Ernest Pintoff, written by Peter Bellwood and Larry Ferguson and based on a story by Michael Timothy Murphy and Larry Sturholm, St. Helens aired on HBO on May 18, 1981, a little more than a year after the real eruption.

St. Helens begins on March 20, 1980 with an earthquake measuring 5.1 on the Richter scale being unleashing by the volcano, the first activity in more than a hundred years. It causes Otis Kaylor (Ron O’Neal) to nearly crash into some loggers as he makes an emergency landing.

United States Geological Survey volcanologist David Jackson (David Huffman) soon shows up to learn more. He’s actually playing someone very close to David Johnston, a scientist who died in the actual volcanic eruption. His parents were angry that not only was her son portrayed as a daredevil but also how much the movie got wrong about the science. Before the movie aired, 36 scientists who knew Johnston signed a letter of protest against the film, saying that “Dave’s life was too meritorious to require fictional embellishments” and that he “was a superbly conscientious and creative scientist.”

He soon becomes friends with a waitress and single mom named Linda Steele (Cassie Yates) and upsets her boss Clyde Whittaker (Albert Salmi) and the locals at Whittaker’s Inn about the danger of the eruption, all while Sheriff Dwayne Temple (Tim Thomerson) tries to keep law and order.

Watching this movie in 2024, it’s amazing how MAGA the people of the town are. It’s no accident that Bill McKinney from Deliverance is one of them. The loudest is the owner of the Mount St. Helens Lodge, Harry R. Truman (Art Carney), who refuses to leave the blast radius and becomes so famous for his stand that he basically can’t leave if he wants to live up to the character that he has created for himself. His sister, Gerri Whiting, served as a historical consultant for the film. According to her, Harry Truman and David Johnston were friends.

At 8:32 a.m. PDT on May 18, 1980, David hikes to find a massive bulge that has been growing on the north face of the mountain while Harry goes fishing in Spirit Lake. As David promised to the locals, they are both annihilated by a force similar to a nuclear bomb going off in their faces.

Sadly, the David who played David — David Huffman — died a sad death as well. He was only 39 years old when he was stabbed twice in the chest while fighting with a would be car thief. He died near instantly.

Why would I watch a movie so surrounded by death and sadness? Because it’s the first Hollywood movie scored by Goblin. Let me tell you, there’s nothing that says the Pacific Northwest more than Italian prog rock.

You can watch this on YouTube.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Phoenix was on the CBS Late Movie on April 3, 1986 and March 2, 1987. 

Long ago, in a remote corner of the world, ancient astronauts landed from a distant planet with a gift for mankind…the Phoenix. For a thousand years, he has waited…suspended in time. Now, he’s awakened to complete his mission. He searches for his partner, Mira. For only she knows his ultimate assignment on Earth. Dependent on the sun for his trek for survival, endowed with a superior intelligence, he has fully developed the powers of the human mind. Relentlessly pursued by those who seek to control him, he must stay free. The Phoenix.

In 1981, a young Sam (Becca was just a glimmer at this point) was obsessed was science fiction, ancient aliens and television. This TV movie — and the four episodes that followed — were repeatedly discussed in the Panico household as a show that seemed to have such promise and then suddenly just disappeared.

Judson Scott (Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan) played Bennu, an ancient astronaut who is awakened from suspended animation within an Incan pyramid. He’s constantly on the run, as the government wants to either control or cut him up (they’re led by Richard Lynch from Bad Dreams).

In the movie, he acquires a love interest who is killed as a result of his escape. The whole movie is pretty dark, actually, setting Bennu up as someone above human emotion and morality who learns how important life on our planet is. His home planet is called Aurica in the movie, but Eidebran for the series.

He has plenty of powers, too. Physical levitation, telepathy, astral projection, precognition, clairvoyance and telekinesis, which are all helped by his Phoenix Amulet and its ability to draw use solar energy.

Beyond Richard Lynch’s Justin Preminger antagonist, Bennu must also contend with another alien named Yago. Just like our hero uses the sun, he uses our moon. It’s hinted that Lucifer and Dracula are both fictionalized versions of this villain, who can deafen with his Bells of Thon and has a musical instrument named the Black Moonball that allows him to teleport or change his appearance. Even more interesting to me, at least, is that his original name in the show was to be Aiwaz, the angel who read The Book of the Law to Crowley!

Bennu isn’t all alone, though. He’s helped by Dr. Ward Frazier (E.G. Marshall, Creepshow) and spends the series searching for his mate, Mira (Sheila Frazier, Super Fly).

The show was created by Anthony Lawrence, who wrote several Elvis movies and created the TV series The Sixth Sense that was often syndicated along with Night Gallery. And get this, a few of the episodes were directed by Douglas Hickox (Theater of Blood)!

There’s never been an actual release of this series, but you can find it on iOffer and other grey market sites.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Lady and the Highwayman was on the CBS Late Movie on April 27, 1990.

Barbara Cartland’s romance novel Cupid Rides Pillion was filmed as this British TV movie, one of the first appearances by Hugh Grant, who appears alongside a pretty solid cast that includes Oliver Reed (once a werewolf, once a diver out of a mansion window in Burnt Offerings), Claire Bloom (Clash of the Titans), Michael York (who I associate with this type of movie most often, as he was in The Three Musketeers), Emma Samms (Dynasty), Sir John Mills (Quatermass in the 1979 TV movie) and Liz Fraser (who was in many of the Carry On movies) among others.

It’s yet another time I watch a movie and am amazed that it’s a John Hough movie. The guy has such a vast resume — everything from Twins of Evil and The Legend of Hell House in the late 60’s horror genre to great 70’s fare like Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry and the two Witch Mountain movies and then some out there 80’s stuff like The Watcher in the Woods, American Gothic, Biggles and Howling IV: The Original Nightmare.

Emma Samms’ character of Lady Castlemaine is based on the life of Barbara Palmer, First Duchess of Cleveland, one of King Charles II’s mistresses and the mother of several of his children, in case you’re into British scandals.

This is the story of Lord Lucius Vyne (Grant), who is loyal to King Charles II and helping help to return to rule after Cromwell. He takes on a secret identity as the Silver Blade, kind of like a musketeer of sorts. He’s too late to save Lady Panthea Vyne’s (Lysette Anthony, Krull) King Charles Spaniel from being stomped to death, so fair warning if you like small dogs.

Even when the king comes back, he has enemies, so the Silver Blade remains in his service, even when it nearly costs him and his lady love’s life.

You can watch this on Tubi and trust me, the print is just as horrible. I think with a British TV movie from the late 80’s, this is as good as we’re going to get.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Nightmare In Badham County was on the CBS Late Movie on February 18 and October 18, 1983 and February 8, 1985.

This was a made-for-TV movie but was released in theaters internationally with extended footage and nudity. It was so popular in China that actress Deborah Raffin became the first Western actress to make a promotional tour of the country and became an unofficial ambassador helping China make deals with Hollywood.

Raffin plays Cathy Phillips, who is driving across the country with her friend Diane Emery (Lynne Moody), ends up on the wrong end of the law after turning down the intentions of Sheriff Slim Danen (Chuck Connors), who puts them in jail and assaults Diane. This being a small Southern town, our heroines get sent to a work camp run by Superintendant Dancer (Robert Reed) and his guards, Dulcie, Smitty (Lana Wood) and Greer (Tina Louise).

Not everyone is going to make it out alive in this John Llewellyn Moxey — the man who made just about every great TV movie — film. Its writer, Jo Helms, also wrote the scripts for Play Misty for Me and The Girl in Lovers Lane.

This is another movie that reminds me I don’t go on vacation and talk to police officers too long. The saddest thing about this movie is that for all the attention it paid to having the women be in segregated jails, the actors all had to stay in segregated hotels while making this movie.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Longest Night was on the CBS Late Movie on November 14, 1974; April 19, 1977 and January 2, 1978.

Based on the 1968 Barbara Mackle kidnapping by Gary Steven Krist, this was the ABC Movie of the Week, airing on September 12, 1972.

Karen Chambers has been kidnapped and placed in an underground coffin with an air supply and water while the criminals try and get the money. Karen is played by Sallie Shockley, which is kind of interesting because The Candy Snatchers is pretty much the same movie — well, this is made for TV and doesn’t get quite so rough — and the female protagonist of that movie was played by another alliteratively named actress, Susan Sennett.

This was directed by Jack Smight, whose resume includes The Illustrated Man, Damnation Alley, The Traveling Executioner, No Way to Treat a Lady and Airport 1975, which is the very definition of an eclectic resume. He’s working from a script by Merwin Gerard, whose TV movie credits are The Screaming Woman, The Victim, She Cried Murder and The Invasion of Carol Enders. He also created the series One Step Beyond.

The cast is great. There’s David Janssen as the father, Phyllis Thaxter (Ma Kent from the Superman movies) as the mother, James Farentino as the lead kidnapper, Skye Aubrey as his partner and Mike Farrell as an FBI agent.

Beyond being referenced in the aforementioned The Candy Snatchers, this was also filmed in 1990 as 83 Hours ‘Til Dawn. There’s also an episode of Quincy M.E., “Tissue of Truth,” that is ripped from these headlines. This movie only aired once, as there were issues with who owned the rights to the story.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Bogie was on the CBS Late Movie on August 20, 1982.

I have a big weakness for made for TV biopics, often because they’re rarely good and yet that keeps me coming back to them. The blame lies at the feet of the multiple tabloids my grandmother subscribed to as I learned about Liz’s sad last days, Liberace and Rock Hudson’s watermelon diet and who was beating who, who was doing drugs and who was getting surgery.

Based on Joe Hyams’ 1966 novel, Bogie: The Biography of Humphrey Bogart, this stars Kevin O’Connor as Humphrey Bogart, who was my father’s favorite actor. O’Connor has an interesting list of credits, like playing Irijah in The Passover Plot and Woody in Let’s Scare Jessica to Death.

In the roles of the two loves of his life are Ann Wedgeworth (Aunt Fern from Steel Magnolias) as Mayo Methot and Kathryn Harrold (Raw Deal) as Lauren Bacall.

Director Vincent Sherman made The Return of Dr. X, All Through the Night, Crime School, Across the Pacific and King of the Underworld with Bogie and writer Daniel Taradash wrote Knock on Any Door, so they knew that man. It’s hard to say if this was right, because it seems like it tries to get in so much in such a short time. The transitions where it shows Bogart in his many roles seem like something out of pictures you would get in a Wild West saloon at a theme park. Nothing feels authentic. Much of the film is O’Connor mugging for the camera and trying to get his face to look like the star.

You can spot a young Drew Barrymore as Bogie’s daughter Leslie.

When asked about the movie, his widow Lauren Bacall said, It’s a bunch of crap, and there’s no way to stop it. It’s a crock, unadulterated garbage, and it’s untrue. They’re just going to use him. Jesus, there’s no creativity left in the world. People will do anything for money. Anything.”

Oddly enough, both Bogart and O’Connor died from cancer.

You can watch this on Tubi.

Laurence Kendall (Kurt Russell) is a wanderer, a model stranded in the middle of nowhere who happens upon the farm of Elroy “Bud” Burkhardt (Dennis Weaver), a wheat harvester who is dealing with economic issues and also dying of cancer. He has a daughter named Marlene (Mare Winningham) who dreams of leaving Kansas and a son Dougie (Rossie Harris) who ran to Canada during the draft. Somehow, this hardened farmer will become like another father to this young man who has never worked hard in his life.

Directed by Joseph Sargent (Jaws: The Revenge) and written by Ken Trevey, this is a really dramatic, well-made TV movie, a reminder of a time when Dennis Weaver was a big star and Kurt Russell was unproven as an adult actor. Plus, you get Wilford Brimley as an opposing rancher and plenty of gorgeous scenery.

You can watch this on YouTube.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Maneater was on the CBS Late Movie on September 26, 1975 and May 9, 1977.

Directed by Vince Edwards — Ben Casey himself — and written by Edwards, Marcus Demian and Jimmy Sangster, Maneater is another retelling of The Most Dangerous Game, this time with two couples — Nick and Gloria Baron (Ben Gazzara and Sheree North) and Shep and Polly (Kip Niven and Laurette Spang) — who are on an RV vacation.

Look, if you go on an RV trip in a 70s movie, you’re dead.

As their camper breaks down, they’re helped by Carl Brenner (Richard Basehart), who is the owner of two tigers. As money is low, he’s been feeding them by causing accidents and having the tigers get a buffet of tourists. But first, he has his wife Paula (Claire Brennen) serve them a rattlesnake dinner. Then he shows them his private camp area and offers it to them, which they should have said no to, because after dinner he was going on about conversation starters like “Men kill for pleasure. Animals kill to survive.”

What follows is cats chasing humans and Ben Gazzara proving that while he’s a city boy, he knows how to survive.

You can watch this on YouTube.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Mind Over Murder was on the CBS Late Movie on July 30, 1982.

Suzy (Deborah Raffi, Death Wish 3) is a dancer who suddenly has psychic visions where time slows down and she can witness a strange bald man (Andrew Prine, as creepy as it gets) assaulting and murdering women. Her boyfriend Jason (Bruce Davison) refuses to believe her but she gets some help from government agent Ben Kushing (David Ackroyd) and his partner Ted Beasly (Robert Englund). She can see the bald man killing everyone on an airplane and they hope that she can use her Eyes of Laura Mars powers and stop him.

Also known as Psychomania, Are You Alone Tonight? and Deadly Vision, this was directed by Ivan Nagy and written by Robert Carrington (Venom, Wait Until Dark).

This is the best IMDB review ever: “Deborah Raffin punched in the stomach? If this is the same movie I’m thinking about, what I recall the most is the lead girl (very pretty) Debra Raffin (I think) was punched real hard in the stomach by a bald guy. The punches weren’t seen but they were heard and then she was seen on her knees, doubled up on the floor – suffering for a long period of time, holding her stomach and bent over. I was rather young when I first saw this movie and I remember that scene of the girl on her knees, bent over double holding her stomach and in so much pain. I remember think How could someone do such a thing to such pretty girl? Her acting in the part was superb. She acted as though she had really been punched in the stomach.” 10 out of 10 stars.

Speaking of creepy, Prine is incredible in this, yelling dialogue like, “What do you want to do first? Make love or die?” She also gets to see him shirtless and glistening with oil while wearing pants that feel painted on as he stalks and kills several women.

And creepier still, let’s talk Ivan Nagy. A former bookmaker for the mob and boyfriend of Heidi Fleiss; he also directed episodes of CHIPs and HBO’s The Hitchhiker, as well as the movies Captain America II: Death Too Soon and Pushing Up Daisies. He made Deadly Hero, a film where an unbalanced cop becomes a hero after killing the stalker of a woman, then becoming obsessed with her, as well as the Gary Coleman as an arsonist TV movie Playing With Fire and Intimate Encounters, a TV film where Donna Mills get all sexed up. But it’s his movie Skinner that this reminds me of, a giallo-style thriller that has a killer pursuing Ricki Lake and being pursued himself by a scarred Traci Lords, one of the many sex workers that he’s cut off their skin but the only one who has survived. It’s beyond scummy in the way that only someone who knows the world they’re writing about can create.

After that movie, Nagy went into adult films, directing Izzy Sleeze’s Casting Couch Cuties, Trailer Trash Teri and Wild Desire.

You can watch this on Tubi.