April 10: Seagal vs. Von Sydow—One is a laughable martial artist, and the other is a beloved acting legend. You choose whose movie you watch; it’s both of their birthdays.

Based on The Unsleeping Eye by David G. Compton, Death Watch imagines a future world where illness has been eliminated. Well, all except for Katherine Mortenhoe (Romy Schneider), who is dying of some mysterious sickness and has agreed to allow her death to be filmed by the NTV network and their boss, Vincent Ferriman (Harry Dean Stanton). She gives the money to her husband and goes on the run.

That’s when she meets Roddy (Harvey Keitel), a cameraman whose eyes are replaced by cameras. She has no idea that this man is filming her and he’s given up his future — he’ll go blind if he is in darkness for any length of time, even sleep, and must shine a light into his eyes every 15 minutes — to make sure the public gets to watch her expire.

Katharine wants to see her first husband, Gerald (Max Von Sydow) one more time before she dies. She asks Roddy to get her makeup in town, and while there, he sees a commercial for the TV show he’s been filming, Death Watch. He loses his sanity and his flashlight, eventually going blind and confessing to Katharine what he’s been doing.

The truth is that the network has made all of this up. Katharine isn’t dying, and the pills she’s been given make her sick. She’s convinced that her death is coming, so she overdoses at Gerald’s house just in time for Vincent to show up.

Bertrand Tavernier, who directed and co-wrote this with David Rayfiel, dedicated this movie to Jacques Tourneur, who made Cat People, The Leopard Man, I Walked With a Zombie and Curse of the Demon.

In the world that he creates in this film, everything has become boring. Machines create all of the art while man numbs himself with drugs. This is our world. Add in a police state, protestors paid to hold up signs without caring for the cause, and a heroine who decides to control her own fate rather than be controlled by the media, and you get a movie that feels more of our time than a future story. If anything, it feels too real.

April 9: Do You Like Tubi Originals? — I do. You should find one and write about it. Here’s a list to help.

Imani (Chantal Riley) is a pastry chef, and Deon (Kwaku Adu-Poku) is an attorney. They’ve just gotten engaged and are looking for a place to live, which brings them to the Luxe Center Condos. Somehow, despite it being one of the hardest places to get into, they miraculously get a place. It all seems perfect—too perfect—until they learn that Deon’s ex-wife Tamera (Getenesh Berhe) is their next-door neighbor—the ex he never told Imani about.

Somehow, Tamera has the whole building wired Sliver-style, watching everything the couple does. As you can guess, she has plans for our protagonists.

The thing is, this is way better than it has any right to be, with an ending that keeps me watching Tubi Originals. Director Alpha Nicky (Rush for Your Life) and writer Briana Cole (The Marriage Pass, Toxic Harmony, Sugar Mama, Played and Betrayed) know exactly what kind of movie they’re making and subvert the expectations of the form, creating something worth sitting down and watching.

As always, if you move in next to someone who made your life hell, they aren’t going to stop just because you’re with someone new. But what if the someone new was also dangerous to your life, just perhaps? And what if they both are? Man, this has layers, and that’s why I love it, including the ridiculous notion that you should ever allow your ex-wife to be the lawyer in charge of your estate. Why would you even think that this would work out?

Then again, we want Tubi characters to act just like this. We want them to explode over suggested infidelity, get in catfights, and just be dumb. They exceed our expectations again in Ex Door Neighbor.

You can watch this on Tubi.

April 9: Do You Like Tubi Originals? — I do. You should find one and write about it. Here’s a list to help.

Remember Invasive?

That was all about Kay (Khosi Ngema) and her friend Riley (Matthew Vey) sneaking into the home of pharma king Pierce Patton (Francis Chouler) and his girlfriend Jessica (Alex McGregor), then discovering body horror experiments.

In the follow-up, Kay and her father winning an all-expenses paid trip to an island but ahh — it turns out that it’s the home of Patton’s father (Craig Urbani) and perhaps at least one other character has evil reasons for being there as well.

Directed and written by Jem Garrard, this has an I Still Know What You Did Last Summer vibe, which comes from the island, as well the fact that it adds on to the kills and blood of the original but without the simple oddball plot twist of having it all be about medical experiments.

It seems like every character in this gets stabbed or beaten up in some way or another, but now Kay is more traditionally the hero and less someone sneaking into a house, so it isn’t as unique as the first movie. I can only imagine there will be one more sequel and just as sure, I will watch it.

You can watch this on Tubi.

April 8: Zoo Lover’s Day — You know what that means. Animal attack films!

Lesley Selander directed 107 Westerns, but he also found the time to make other things, like assistant directing A Night At the Opera and making early TV shows like Lassie. The script was by Sherman Lowe, who mostly worked in movie serials.

Writer Charles Regnier (Carl Esmond) has written a book that gets him into political trouble, which leads to him being targeted by a cat-inspired killer who starts murdering his friends like librarian Devereaux (Francis McDonald) and former girlfriend Marguerite Duval (Adele Mara). His current girlfriend, Marie Audet (Lenore Aubert), wants to protect him and ends up being the one who catches the Catman. This has a bit of Giallo in it, as Charles keeps blacking out and isn’t sure that he isn’t the killer.

This was Republic’s first horror double feature, made around the same time as Valley of the Zombies.

Unlike many studios, Republic didn’t make enough horror films to assemble a syndication package. That’s why this was forgotten for so many years, as it didn’t play on TV like many of its contemporaries.

April 8: Zoo Lover’s Day — You know what that means. Animal attack films!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Jennifer Upton is an American (non-werewolf) writer/editor in London. She currently works as a freelance ghostwriter of personal memoirs and writes for several blogs on topics as diverse as film history, punk rock, women’s issues, and international politics. For links to her work, please visit https://www.jennuptonwriter.com or send her a Tweet @Jennxldn

A late ‘70s film about abandoned canines on a remote camping area called Seal Island who revert to a feral pack existence and terrorize the asshole humans on vacation who left them to starve after summer vacation. A few innocent people on a camping/fishing trip fall afoul and get eaten, but those are the breaks when your species is so cruel. Lesson? Be kind and carry treats. 

Director Robert Clouse (Enter the Dragon) does quite a good job creating tension, although I did find the subplot about the dad trying to get his nerd son laid a bit weird. Who goes to an isolated island for that?

Strange subplots aside, a few scenes in The Pack feel a bit like the siege scenes in the original Night of the Living Dead. A lot of people have genuine fear of dogs and Clouse exploits this to the max. It’s a statistical fact that a criminal on the run is less afraid of a cop with a gun than a police dog. Dogs can be our best friends, but the instinct to fear an unrelenting predator lies deep with human DNA. The scenes with the blind man and his faithful hero guide German Shepherd are suspenseful and had me rooting for them. 

Joe Don Baker plays a down-to-earth wildlife expert named Jerry thrown into a situation where he must protect both himself and his son, the locals (including a blind man) and his new girlfriend and her son. I thought the film was going to go into Jaws territory but was pleasantly surprised at the originality on display here. There’s even one scene where one of the pack attacks a car that I’m almost positive inspired U of M’s Steve King to sit down and write Cujo. 

All the dog stunts in this film are great. Especially noteworthy are the scenes where there are multiple dogs of different breeds and temperaments all following the in same instructions simultaneously. I’ve been to a dog’s birthday party, and I can tell you, getting them all to sit still and look in the same direction for a photo takes time and patience. One can only imagine the time it took the trainer (s) stage some of the scenes in this film. 

The film’s star dog gives (a collie mix) a great performance in the end scene, where he wants to learn to trust humans again, but he’s still not quite over the trauma he’s been through. The dog’s behavior in this scene is absolutely spot on and will be familiar  to anyone who has ever worked with traumatized rescue dogs.  The mixture of apprehension and desire for food is both heart-breaking and a little scary. 

The late ‘70s were the peak era of primal fear films. This under-seen film stands proudly with the best of them. 

April 7: Jackie Day — Celebrate Jackie Chan’s birthday!

The Protector was a troubled creation. Initially, it would be written by Robert Clouse for Christmas 1982, but that got. However, that version was delayed after Project A went over schedule. After some retooling, James Glickenhaus came on to direct, which led to this movie being sold as “When the no. 1 action director meets the no. 1 action star… Watch out!”

Guess what? They didn’t get along. Chan learned that no one in America cared about taking the time to do fight choreography. In Hong Kong, he’d get a month to do one. In America? Two days.

This meant there were two versions, one for the U.S. and the other for Hong Kong. In both, Jackie plays Billy Wong, an NYPD cop who gets a new partner, Danny Garoni (Danny Aiello), and heads to Hong Kong to stop a kidnapping and a drug deal. Even though the goal was to make Jackie into Clint Eastwood — had no one learned that they tried to make him into Bruce Lee and it didn’t work until he was himself? — but at least he fights Bill “Superfoot” Wallace. The Hong Kong version adds a dancer — May-Fong Ho (Sally Yeh) — whose father was killed by gangsters.

Wrestling fans may be surprised to see Big John Studd show up in the beginning. There’s no extended battle between him and Jackie, who shoots him. Studd, who was born in Saxonburg, PA, is also in Double Agent, The Marrying Man, Harley Davidson and the Marloboro Man, Hyper Space, Caged In Paradiso and Micki & Maude. He also appeared in episodes of The A-Team, Hunter and Beauty and the Beast.

After this, Jackie made the movie he wanted with Police Story. He wouldn’t be a star in the U.S. until Rumble In the Bronx. As for the Robert Crouse script that he didn’t make, it would be filmed as China O’Brien with another Golden Harvest star, Cynthia Rothrock.

You can watch this on Tubi.

April 6: Independent-International: Write about a movie from Sam Sherman. Here’s a list.

Vicki Mason (Karen Corrado) is trying to change the world — or at least her small town — by trying out as a kicker on the football team. Her boyfriend Brian Caldwell (Max Goff, Cheerleaders Beach Party) isn’t impressed, but she’s sick of him cheating on her, so she dumps him and goes all in on the team even if they don’t want her.

Director Steven Jacobson edited Nurse Sherri and shot the extra footage in Naked Evil, but otherwise, that was it for his career. The script comes from Jennifer Lawson, who went on to be the CEO of a public broadcasting station, and Sam Sherman, the man who brought so much to us through Independent-International.

This feels as much like a Corman nurse cycle movie as it does an Animal House cash-in. It’s worth watching for James Spader’s and Estelle Getty’s first roles. He was 18, and she was just a spry 55.

Four years later, this was re-released as Young Gangs at Wildwood High — Sam Sherman knew how to cash-in on stuff like Fast Times at Ridgemont High — and you have to admire the balls to do that. Thanks, Temple of Schlock, for always having facts like this. It’s worth noting that this film had two campaigns as Team-Mates and another in 1980 as Young Gangs, hoping that people looking for The Warriors at the drive-in could be confused into seeing this movie that has nothing to do with gangs and so much more to do with football.

You can watch this on YouTube.

April 5: Visual Vengeance Day — Write about a movie released by Visual Vengeance. Here’s a list to help you find a movie.

Directed and written by Les Sekely (Vampire Time Travelers), this is similar to that film and this quote that I used to describe that one is even more accurate: “This movie feels less like a narrative movie and more like someone made a Dark Brothers or Rinse Dream adult movie mainstream, giving it constant blasts of words and images…” If I say Party Doll-A-Go-Go and you get it, you’re a pervert, and we should be friends, and you’ll know exactly what kind of strange editing and barrage of sound effects and dumb jokes that entails.

Years ago, students destroyed the life of their teacher. Most of them got over it, but only one still feels some empathy and wonders what happened to her, perhaps because his girlfriend is also a teacher. Yes, you now get that this is not a rip-off of I Know What You Did Last Summer, except for being close to the title.

I can see that as a movie that would anger many viewers, as it doesn’t even let up with being silly, even when it’s trying to be heartfelt. The sound effects, if anything, get louder and more repetitive, kind of like Max Headroom repeating himself. It was something in the way 90s and 00s movies could be edited and doesn’t seem to have survived until today. Yet here’s this film, rescued by Visual Vengeance, a little shot in Lakewood, OH effort about demons, classroom hijinks and the regret of growing up, mixed with male gaze rear-end shots and a Troma-like sensibility without nudity. I haven’t seen many movies like it, so you should try it at least.

You can watch this on Tubi.