The description of this movie on IMDB: “The seven sisters of the outcast LeFleur family try to survive in a post-Civil War Deep South.”

My wife’s description: “What is all that screaming downstairs?”

There’s a version of this movie online and it’s as complete as it can be. Milligan ran out of money before he could film the last scenes and the ending. So how should it have ended? No one is sure, as the only surviving shooting script ends at the same point the film does. So who is the killer? Who knows! The only part of the ending that is known is that the mansion was going to burn down.

In 2019, this premiered on byNWR, Nicolas Winding Refn’s free cult movie streaming website. Jimmy McDonough, Andy Milligan’s biographer, had the only surviving copy of the workprint, given to him by the director before he died. Whatever survived was restored, along with another unfinished Milligan movie, Compass Rose.

Who else would film a Southern gothic in Staten Island other than Milligan? And who else would have people stabbed in the neck with a pitchfork, a face burned with acid and decapitated heads rolling around in the midst of a talky — well, screamy? — blast of a family in decline, repeatedly slapping and spitting and yelling at each other? Not to mention voodoo and costumes that are so good that they stand in defiance of the actors attempting to get all they can out of the overly detailed dialogue!

Seven sisters try to survive the South with a serial killer on the prowl. Write your own ending while you’re at it. You’ll get an Andy Milligan No-Prize or something.

You can watch this on YouTube.

Shot on short ends, made with costumes designed by director and writer and Andy Milligan, decorated with animal organs for special effects, The Ghastly Ones was made for all of $13,000 in a country estate somewhere in Staten Island. It may as well have been made in another dimension.

Also known as Blood Rites and refilmed again by Milligan in 1978 as Legacy of Blood, this movie is all about Veronica, Victoria and Elizabeth, the daughters of a man who has ordered them to stay for three nights in his home before they learn what he has left to them. I mean, how dangerous can that be? It’s not like his hunchback butler hasn’t already killed two people before the credits and torn a rabbit apart, leaving it in the bed of Veronica with the note, “Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit.”

What follows are family members and their husbands sliced in two, stabbed with pitchforks, beheaded and even smashed directly in the face with axes. Yes, there’s something here for everyone, if by everyone you mean people who can deal with Andy Milligan films, which have been critically destroyed for years, by people like Stephen King who said it was “the work of morons with cameras.”

It’s also one of the original video nasties, even though that list was made a decade after its release.

You know why I love it? Because the costumes and story say centuries ago while the traffic outside the windows say late 60’s. Because you can hear Milligan end some of the scenes. And because, well, it feels like another world, another place, an escape from this day in day out work work work.

Originally released as Seeds of Sin with unconnected sex scenes inside the film, Andy Milligan succeeds at something that only Juan López Moctezuma can come close to: non-stop screaming.

Everybody in this movie hates themselves, hates one another and hates anyone that comes in between one another. Even the camera hates everyone, swirling out of the way to avoid whatever is happening on screen at times. Christmas has brought the Manning family together one last time and someone is killing them one by one, but it feels like a mercy killing as originally fake smiles give way to teeth bared and always the yelling, always the anger, always the screaming.

Peter and Jessica, the live-in help, also want to kill mom.

Maggie Rogers is Claris the mother, confined to a wheelchair, drinking herself to death, burning the money instead of heating her house, lording over a family that includes son Michael and daughter Carol forever sexually intertwined even when he’s abusing his wife Susan, sex-obsessed priest son Matthew, daughter Margaret who is dating a tough guy and Buster, the military school brat who is obsessed with the Third Reich and his lover Drew while also being abused by Matthew.

Everyone in this movie has an issue, several of them more than one, and they all drag one another into a festering abyss of tortured life and painful death. Acid to the face, knife to the heart, electrocuted in the bathtub.

I can’t even imagine what this film’s distributors must have thought when they got it and wondered, “Who wants to endure this?” Me! That’s who. Instead, they stuffed it with faceless people having anonymous sex as if that would erase the psychological barrage that you just witnessed. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to get down after watching this and if they are, they just might eat your head after they’re done with you.

A holiday movie.

A remake — a loose one — of The Ghastly Ones, this movie has three sisters and their husbands arrive at a remote inn to attend the reading of their uncle’s will. One by one, they are dispatched by an unknown killer. It sounds simple, but this is Andy Milligan. It’s going to get strange.

“Think of your worst nightmare… It’s about to happen again!” That’s what brought people in for this movie and it’s a pretty good tagline. As for the movie, it’s set in the 1800s but obviously shot in modern day Staten Island. And who cares? By this point, if you’re watching this, you’ve given into the world of Andy Milligan.

Margaret (Elaine Boies) and Mary Lennox (Marilee Troncone) work in the Hanley Mansion, which is also home to their mentally challenged brother Carl (Chris Broderick). The master of the house is long gone, but now his daughetrshave finally come to claim their pieces of the estate. There’s Regina (Dale Hansen) and her husband Joe (Joe Downing); Jennifer (Louise Gallandra) and Robert (Peter Schwartz); and Louise and John (Peter Barcia), all of whom must spend three days together to get their inheritance. Well, that is if any of them survive, as the psychic Baba (Bob Elia) predicts at least one will die.

This was also edited into a TV cut, Legacy of Horror, that is a little longer but is missing the gore. That’s so much of the fun, as someone gets their guts sawed into, there’s a decapitation, a hand chopped off and an accidental hatchet to the head.

Legacy of Blood may be the most technically well-made of Andy Milligan’s films, but do we even come to his work for that?

You can watch this on Tubi.

Ten years after her family was killed in a tragic car crash, college student Millie Barnes (Parker McKenna) has a bright future and plenty of friends. Or maybe I should have written that she had plenty of friends, as they start dying off one by one. Now, Millie has to figure out who is killing them all and why.

If you watch Tubi Originals, you know Chris Stokes (three movies of The Stepmother, The Assistant, Picture Me Dead) and his usual writing partner, Marques Houston (No Way Out, You’re Not Alone). They’re back for another thriller that has a lot of I Know What You Did Last Summer to it.

A decade ago, Mille had to deal with losing her parents Eric and Tracy. Sure, she’s made a comeback, but those scars run deep. Yet she’s now the most popular girl in college and her friends come from rich and powerful families, like her boyfriend Kaleb (Marc John Jeffries), whose father owns the company that she’s about to start working for fresh out of school. Her other friends are Adam (Jorden Smooth), Lewis (Paul Toweh), Bree (Asia Harmony), Terri (Taylor Crawford), Timmy (Milo Stokes), Sophia (Zonnique, whose father is T.I. in real life), Channel (Janina Gordillo) and Sommer (Iyana Halley).

Well, you can cross the first four off the list. Adam overdoses on steroids (which rarely happens), Lewis slips and ends up with a broken neck, Bree’s heel breaks and she falls off a balcony and Terri, the daughter of Judge Eleanor Smith, is killed in a car crash. Someone starts sending letters to Millie teasing each of these murders, asking if they were accidents.

Can she figure out who the killer is before the two detectives on the case? Will Timmy and Kaleb kill one another before the murderer gets to them? Will it take an entire hour before we even get to the nautical vessel this is titled after? Is there a secret sibling? Will I watch every single Tubi Original?

Of course. Yes. Uh-huh. Yep. Totally.

There are also childhood flashbacks, the fabulous Aunt Carol (Cynthia Brady), a strange woman named Olga (Carnette Jones), our protagonist with a bomb strapped to her and an ending that teases a sequel that knowing Stokes, Houston and Tubi that I feel sure that we will receive.

You can watch this on Tubi.

The Church of Mortavia needs cash, so Father Guru does what he can, which means getting dead bodies for medical students to experiment on. This may mean stabbing churchgoers in the eyeball or working with vampires and hunchbacks. And while this is all supposedly set in the Middle Ages, it was really shot in New York City’s St. Peter’s Church, which means that you just may hear the sounds of modern traffic.

Shot for $11,000, this is yet another Milligan film where the director Milligan wrote, directed, built sets and sewed costumes for a film made up of mainly off-off Broadway actors and Staten Island locals. How else would you populate a prison colony of Catholic sinners who were all waiting to be served sentences that are all being wiped out by an insane priest?

This was made as part of a double bill with another of Milligan’s movies, The Body Beneath. It’s around 55 minutes long and has some gore, but in no way does it have as inventive of a title as Milligan’s best-named film, The Rats are Coming! The Werewolves are Here!

Milligan is a fascinating character study, probably moreso than his films to be perfectly honest. He was considered one of the worst directors of all time until his movie Fleshpot on 42nd Street was rediscovered by Something Weird Video and his theatrical efforts were unearthed. In some strange universe, his work as a queer filmmaker found a better audience than maniacs like me who watched his movies like The Ghastly Ones.

Frantic Friar

• 1.5 oz. Frangelico
• .75 oz. lemon juice
• .75 oz. lime juice
• Maraschino cherry

1. Pour Frangelico and juices into a shaker with ice.
2. Scream at it like you’re in an Andy Milligan movie while shaking, then pour in a glass and top with a cherry.