JUNESPLOITATION: The Torturer (2005)

June 30: Junesploitation’s topic of the day — as suggested by F This Movie— is Italian horror!

“A dark and gloomy theatre set for strange castings. An awful and neglected villa. A stage writer who pushes young actresses to put themselves at risk in morbid auditions thick with physical pain and pleasure. Around the writer stir his ancient and sick mother, his agent/stepfather, the aspiring actors and a young actress with whom he falls in love. Who is the torturer who tears to pieces the bodies of the implausible actresses?”

Shot on digital video and directed by Lamberto Bava, this film was written by Bava, Diego Cestino, and Andrea Valentini. It was based on a story by Dardano Sacchetti, Luciano Martino, and Michele Massimo Tarantini.

It’s as if Lamberto saw all the torture porn being made and said, “This is pretty much giallo with more violence. Maybe more nudity. Maybe we make this more sleazy! Hey — I know how to do these films. My dad made The Whip and the Body!”

Ginette Cazonni (Elena Bouryka) auditions for the new movie by director Alex Scerba (Simone Corrente) and ends up in bed with him. When she wakes up in the morning, she finds an earring that resembles the one her missing friend, Marzia, used to wear. It turns out that she also had an audition with the director before she disappeared. And oh yes, Alex’s mother and stepfather are both weird in their own ways. And if you’re looking for that other missing earring, well, Alex’s mother is wearing it.

Look, no matter how handsome a director is, if he’s off camera using a voice box to tell you to get naked and do things for him, perhaps you’re in a movie like this. And man, this movie! Lamberto must have gone down to Argento’s basement under Profundo Rosso and communicated with Fulci, because this sees New York Ripper and raises it a lunatic with a blowtorch and a barbed wire whip, all shown in full detail. I can only imagine Lamberto laughing at the young kids like Eli Roth and saying, “This isn’t so difficult.”

Ladies — in the world of Giallo and in the real plane of existence that we live on — if your boyfriend goes insane when he sees toy cars but then immediately wants to have sex with you, please get out.

This is way late in the Giallo film cycle, but it gets the memo right. You want gorgeous women, you want a nonsensical plot, you want family issues and this has it all. You may not want to watch naked girls get torn up with whips, but it was 2005, after all. At least Lamberto was still out there making movies, the last of a dying breed.

You can watch this on YouTube.

Segreti di donna 2 (2005)

The Dark Side of a Woman was directed by Pierre Le Blanc, but by now, we all know that this is Bruno Mattei. When the rest of his Italian exploitation brothers were either dead, retired or relegated to making TV movies or pornography, Bruno was still out there. Here, he’s 74 years old and still making the kind of movies he directed throughout his entire career.

Jane Dimao (Yvette Yzon, who is seemingly the 2000s version of Laura Gemser for Mattei, appearing in Island of the Living Dead, Zombies: The Beginning (yes, the sequel is the beginning), The Jail: The Women’s Hell and the first film in this series, Segreti di donna) is back from America, working as a women’s sexual pathology psychologist, continuing the work that she studied with her mentor, American sexologist Nicole Wilson. Did you not see the first movie? Good news. Bruno is not above reusing footage.

Jane wants to experience these sexual pathologies for herself, and I have no idea why Bruno didn’t just call this Black Emanuelle 2005. This means that she goes to a swingers club, has sex in a spa and even makes love in front of others. However, when she tries to be a lady of the night, she’s assaulted because Italians love that in their movies. No, I don’t get it either and I’m Italian.

That said, Yzon always gives her all to these movies, and I love that Bruno was heading over to the Phillipines as an old man, shooting dirty—but not really all that filthy—movies on his digital camera and making movies that are nearly quaint when compared to the unleashed carnal depravity anyone can find on the internet.

JESS FRANCO MONTH: Jess Franco’s Perversion (2005)

Augustina Villeblanche (Lina Romay) runs a brothel where her primary duties are spending the days and nights in bed with her assistant (Rachel Sheppard). Two new girls (Carmen Montes and Fata Morgana) have come to work there, which mainly means whipping a man and shaving one another before they decide to eat the man. Such is a day in the late career world of Jess Franco.

Based on Marquis de Sade’s Augustine de Ville Blanche, ou le stratagem de l’amour, this is shot on video in an apartment — maybe the same place where Jess and Lina spent lived — that goes from black and white to color to video effects. Long, languid takes of nothingness; women touching themselves and one another, but presented in such a droning and near robotripping way that the only people who are going to care are those that made it and the devotees of Franco — hey, this is only the 182nd of his movies that I watched, so until I see them all, I am still a dilettante — who will write long and hard about it. So, yes, I guess — me.

I love that when Jess won the Honorary Goya Award for Lifetime Achievement in 2009 for his contributions to Spanish cinema, all these photos were taken of him holding his award. In one of them, surrounded by the greatest examples of Spanish cinema, he stares directly at Penélope Cruz’s chest.

This is the man who summed up his work as “Blood… Tits!… fantastic!”

MILL CREEK BLU RAY RELEASE: The King of Queens (1998-2007)

Premiering on CBS on September 21, 1998, The King of Queens was one of those shows that always seemed to be on. I had never watched it, and all I knew about Kevin James was that he was Mick Foley’s high school wrestling teammate. But when I showed the box set on our weekly “What Came In the Mail” segment on the Drive-In Asylum Double Feature, people were excited and told me that I needed to watch it soon.

It’s a simple set-up. Doug (Kevin James) and Carrie Heffernan (Leah Remini) are pretty much The Honeymooners, a middle-class couple living in Queens, except that her father Arthur (Jerry Stiller) has lost his latest, much younger wife and burned his house down, so now he has to live with them. That’s all there is to it, as it’s about them, their weird friend, and Doug’s schemes to get ahead.

There’s Doug’s straight man, Deacon Palmer (Victor Williams), nerdy mommy’s boy Spencer “Spence” Olchin (Patton Oswalt), cousin Daniel Heffernan (Gary Valentine), dog walker Holly Shumpert (Nicole Sullivan) and even Lou Ferrigno, playing himself. Plus, as you know, I love crossovers; there are four with Everyone Loves Raymond.

The leads are fun, everyone knows their role, and this feels like the kind of show you can just put on and veg out to. I love sitcoms and feel like they’re kind of lost art, so it was fun getting into this for a few episodes. I didn’t like the last season, where Doug and Carrie split, but I could see myself watching more of it.

What fascinates me is that when James started his second show, Kevin Can Wait, his wife, Donna Gable, was portrayed by Erinn Hayes. Yet in the second season, she died off camera and was replaced by Vanessa Cellucci (played by Leah Remini), Kevin’s former rival from the police who becomes his partner in life and at a security company, Monkey Fist Security. Donna’s death is off-handedly mentioned by someone saying, “Ye, it’s been over a year since she died.”

This is where it gets meta.

On the AMC TV show Kevin Can F**k Himself, Allison McRoberts (Annie Murphy) has a man-child of a husband, Kevin (Eric Petersen), who sees life as a sitcom while hers is a drama. Kevin becomes so horrible to her that she begins to plan his death. When people find out, she fakes her passing, and he soon gets another girlfriend who looks and acts exactly like Allison.

She’s played by Erinn Hayes.

I’ve always wondered how we got the beautiful, capable wife and immature husband dynamic ingrained in us and how many relationships it has harmed. It makes me think about how I behave. Then again, as I write this, I am in a basement surrounded by movies and action figures. Hmm.

Mill Creek has released every episode in one gigantic box set. It has extras such as James doing commentary on the pilot with show creator Michael Weithorn; a laughs montage; behind the scenes; a writers featurette; a salute to the fans and the 200th episode celebration. You can get it from Deep Discount.

ARROW VIDEO BLU RAY RELEASE: Rampo Noir (2005)

Based on the works of Edogawa Ranpo, this anthology film features four different stories told by manga artists and directors. It’s a strange film that looks gorgeous and feels incredibly dense.

“Mars Canal, by Suguru Takeuchi, starts the film. A wordless episode, it has a nude man wandering a wasteland and longing for a lover long gone.

“Mirror Hell” was directed by Akio Jissoji (Tokyo: The Last MegalopolisUltra Q: The Movie) has Ranpo’s Detrective Kogoro Akechi (Tadanobu Asano) trying to solve a mystery, as women are turning up with burned faces and a mirror figures into the solution.

“Caterpillar” was directed by pinky director Hisayasu Satō and has its lead, a war hero, return home deaf and without limbs, dependent on his wife for everything. All he can do is see and her beauty stands in contrast to the way that she treats him.

Manga artist Atsushi Kaneko directed the final story, “Crawling Bugs,” as an actress is kidnapped by her limo driver.

I’ve never seen any of the work of any of the filmmakers in this and they’ve really created something unique. It’s definitely something different and if you love aesthetically pleasing films that also strive to upset you, good news. This one will do the trick.

The Arrow Video Blu-ray release of Rampo Noir has new audio commentary by Japanese film experts Jasper Sharp and Alexander Zahlten; new interviews with directors Suguru Takeuchi, Hisayasu Sato and Atsushi Kaneko, cinematographers Masao Nakabori and Akiko Ashizawa and Yumi Yoshiyuki; premiere and making-of features; a reversible sleeve featuring original and newly commissioned artwork by Luke Insect and an illustrated collector’s booklet featuring new writing on the film by Eugene Thacker and Seth Jacobowitz. You can order this from MVD.

ARROW BLU RAY RELEASE: J-Horror Rising: Noroi: The Curse (2005)

As he worked on a documentary he called The Curse, paranormal expert Masafumi Kobayashi (Jin Muraki) disappeared, leaving behind his burned home and his dead wife Keiko (Miyako Hanai). All that is left is the movie he was making.

The Curse concerns Junko Ishii (Tomono Kuga), a woman whose apartment created sounds of crying children. After she moves, Kobayashi and his cameraman break in to find dead birds just as the neighbor and her daughter die in a car crash. Another person has gone missing, a psychic girl by the name of Kana Yano (Rio Kanno) who was taken away by electroplasmic worms, according to another psychic, Mitsuo Hori (Satoru Jitsunashi).

The truth is that Ishii was the daughter of a priest who performed a ritual in 1978 to rid a village of a demon named Kagutaba. Ishii was possessed and has been stealing babies and performing abortions in the years since, as the demon infiltrates the minds of people like actress Marika Matsumoto and making people hang themselves.

If that’s not enough, Ishii tries to take the psychic girl and feed her abortions to summon the demon, which ends up with her hung, the girl dead and Ishii’s son alive. He’s adopted by Kobayashi but we learn — spoilers — in the end credits scene that Hori has escaped from an institution and beats the boy with a rock, believing that he is the demon. Kana’s ghost arrives and Kobayashi’s wife sets herself on fire and the apartment burns as the videotape ends.

I usually hate found footage, but director and writer Koji Shiraishi has such a talent that he makes it work for this film. I loved his movie A Slit-Mouthed Woman and the weirdness of this feels real, like going through the channels late at night and ending up on something that keeps you awake for the entire night.

Noroi: The Curse is one of the films on Arrow’s new J-Horror Rising set. It has extras including new audio commentary by film critic Julian Singleton, new interviews with director Koji Shiraishi and producer Taka Ichise, video essays by Japanese horror specialist Lindsay Nelson and Japanese cinema expert Amber T, and featurettes including How to Protect Yourself Against Curses and the Urgent report! Pursuing the Truth about Kagutaba!! TV Special. You also get half an hour of deleted scenes, trailers, TV ads and an image gallery.

You can buy it from MVD.

APRIL MOVIE THON 3: Domino (2005)

April 9: You’re With the Band — A movie that has a band cameo. Here’s an article to inspire you.

In 1994, director Tony Scott was sent an article by his business manager Neville Shulman. “My Gun for Hire: Why a Movie Star’s Rebel Daughter Turned Into a Bounty Hunter” by Sacha Gervasi was about Domino Harvey, a bounty hunter working for the Celes King Bail Bond agency in South Central Los Angeles and the daughter of actor Laurence Harvey, who was in Room at the TopThe Manchurian Candidate and Life at the Top, and British fashion model Paulene Stone, who refused to have her name be used for the movie, so she’s called Sophie Wynn and played by Jacqueline Bisset.

After completing a bail recovery agent training course, Harvey began working with her teacher Ed Martinez as one of female bounty hunters in the United States. She didn’t make much money, but did the job for the excitement. Living above her mother’s garage in Beverly Hills, she became friends with Scott, who started to observe her as she tracking her marks.

Scott taped hours of conversations with Harvey over twelve years and she spent three weeks on set, appearing in a featurette that’s on the DVD, as well as contributing to the soundtrack and appearing at the wrap party. There were rumors she was unhappy with how she appeared in the film, but sadly, she didn’t live to see it. While she appears as the end of the cast credits, she would not live to see its release, overdosing on fentanyl after years of drug addiction. The movie is dedicated to her.

The first two scripts for this movie were written by Steve Barancik and Roger Avary, but Scott felt they were too normal. He went to Richard Kelly (Donnie DarkoSouthland Tales), who used transcripts of the interviews and wrote what he said was “one of the most subversive films released by a major studio since Fight Club.” As for Scott, he said,  “I didn’t let the movie breathe enough. The script was great — Richard Kelly wrote a great script — and I got overcome by the insanity of the world I was touching. I think I fucked up on that one.” He did say it was one of his favorites.

Domino (Keira Knightley) has been arrested by the FBI after the theft of ten million dollars from an armored truck. As criminal psychologist Taryn Mills (Lucy Liu) interviews her, she tells how she went from being a model and society girl to working with Ed Moseby (Mickey Rourke), Choco (Edgar Ramirez) and their driver Alf (Riz Abbasi), an Afghan whose unpronounceable name leads them to name him after the TV character because it’s said he eats cats.

Their boss, Claremont Williams III (Delroy Lindo) is having an affair with a DMV employee named Lateesha Rodriguez (Mo’Nique) who has a daughter suffering from a blood disease. The operation costs $300,000 so Claremont sets up a deal where some criminals will rob an armored truck from his other business and take the money of Drake Bishop (Dabney Coleman), the owner of the Stratosphere Hotel and Casino, the bounty hunters will track down the robbers, get back the money and get a $300,000 finder’s fee which will go to Rodriguez. Yes, it’s complicated. Yes, it gets much more complicated.

That’s because Lateesha has been running a counterfeit driver’s license scheme that the FBI learns all about. They want info on one of the licenses she made for Frances (Kel O’Neill), the son of the Cigliutti crime family. She throws the operation off by blaming them for the upcoming robbery, which she plans on doing with Claremont after she’s on Jerry Springer’s show talking about how she’s a grandmother at 28.

The bounty hunters apprehend Frances, his brother and his two friends and delivers them to Bishop, who learns that they had nothing to do with the crime. Thinking that his sons are dead, their father heads for the casino while Domino takes $300,000 of Bishop’s money and gives it to Lateesha for her granddaughter’s operation.

Meanwhile, there’s a TV show in the works called Bounty Squad — produced by Mark Heiss (Christopher Walken), which brings her into the orbit of Brian Austin Green and Ian Ziering, who speak to the actual bounty hunters and are terrified.

Of course, everything ends up in a Mexican standoff — and blow up — inside the Stratosphere. The money goes to the little girl — and Afghanistan — as Domino is told to retire.

This movie feels very early 2000s — well, of course — but also like you’re on coke when you watch it. That’s no accident. Scott claimed that there was a high usage of cocaine by the actual bounty hunters he consulted while researching the film and he wanted to get that across. As for that goldfish named Sammy that dies, the symbolism of that is pretty simple. Dakota Fanning told Scott during the making of Man on Fire all about her goldfish who had died.

One of the odder things — I mean, other than the constant snap zooms and the camera feeling its closer than its ever been to actors — is The Wanderer, a character who saves the bounty hunters in the desert and shows up to offer spiritual advice. Keep in mind these are the kind of people who would cut the arm off a man and show it to their mother to get her to open a safe. Waits’ songs “Cold Cold Ground” and “Jesus Gonna Be Here” are also on the soundtrack. Beyond his amazing music, Waits was also in the movies Paradise AlleyWolfenOne From the HeartThe OutsidersRumbles FishThe Stone BoyThe Cotton ClubDown By LawIron LakeGreasy LakeCandy MountainBig TimeBearskin: An Urban Fairy TaleCold FeetMystery TrainThe Two JakesQueens LogicNight On EarthBram Stoker’s DraculaShort CutsMystery MenThe Last CastleCoffee and CigarettesThe Tiger and the SnowWristcutters: A Love StoryThe Imaginarium of Doctor ParnassusThe Book of Eli, The Monster of NixTwixt, Seven PsychopathsThe Ballad of Buster ScruggsThe Old Man & the GunThe Dead Don’t Die, Licorice Pizza, The Absence of Eden and Wildwood.

Speaking of rock star cameos, Macy Gray also shows up as Lashandra.

On August 19, 2012, Scott jumped off Los Angeles’ Vincent Thomas Bridge. He had been fighting cancer but was supposedly in remission. His brother Ridley said that the suicide was inexplicable. One witness said he had no hesitation while another said he looked nervous and held off for two seconds before leaping near a tour boat. He and his brother both came from commercials. After this film, he made Déjà Vu, The Taking of Pelham 123 and Unstoppable, but is best known for Top Gun. He also directed the music video “One More Try” for George Michael and the love scene in his video “Father Figure.”

Domino seems like a parody of an action movie by being the kind of action movie that gets parodied. But I kind of love it for how ridiculous it is. Yet it also feels like a movie steeped in tragedy and pain. Kelly said, “The film opens with a title card that states: “This film is based on a true story… sort of.” The film is very tongue in cheek in its intentional distortion of the truth. This is part of its design… and this design is something that Domino loved about the project. I made it clear to her when I met her that we would capture her fiercely unapologetic, dystopian and ultimately tragic worldview. She saw America through a very subversive punk rock lens (Steve Jones of the Sex Pistols was a friend of hers), and Tony has captured this worldview in a way that she approved. This is a satirical interpretation of a biopic… one that shifts from fact to fantasy as a way of expressing her rebellious spirit and rejection of traditional values, restrictions and archaic traditions forced upon women.”

VISUAL VENGEANCE ON TUBI: Blood of the Chupacabras (2003) and Revenge of the Chupacabras (2005)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Did you know that Visual Vengeance has a ton of movies on Tubi? It’s true. Check out this Letterboxd list and look for reviews as new movies get added. You can find these movies on Tubi: Blood of the Chupacabras and Revenge of the Chupacabras. You can read an interview with the director here and get this on blu ray from Diabolik DVD.

Visual Vengeance has brought back two Blockbuster Video shelf favorites, both concerning the infernal Mexican goatsucker known as el chupacabra! In the book Latinos and Narrative Media: Participation and Portrayal, these films are credited with starting the trend in movies about the chupacabras.

Blood of the Chupacabras (2003): If you read any reviews that came out on this movie’s original release, they all decry the fact that the poster and cover art are so amazing and the actual monster is not. But you know, that’s part of the charm in director and writer Jonathan Mumm’s movie (he also edited and composed some of the music).

The town that this takes place in has near Andy Milligan level supernatural coincidences: there’s a witch. There’s an old vampire hunter. There’s a singer. There’s an old prospector! And yes, there’s a chupacabra controlling possessed townsfolk from within a cave.

There are so many people in this town and let me tell you, I kind of love that the majority of this movie is people arguing over rent and trying to figure out how to survive in their downtrodden lives and then realizing, “Oh yeah. There’s a monster that kills goats in a cave.” That’s how real life is. You know that there are so many evil creatures in the woods outside of town but you live in a capitalist society and the cogs of the military-industrial complex are greased in the blood of the working man.

In addition to all of those characters — seriously, if you missed meeting new people in the new COVID era, get ready to meet so many people and then meet some more people — this movie has a synth score that in no way tries to sound real. You may be too young to remember organ stores in the mall and the poor souls that worked there that had to non-stop play synth and organ ditties while we shopped around them. Who were these people buying these gigantic organs? Where was the budget to hire so many people to play them? Where did they all go?

I digress.

I love when people review this movie and say it has so much talking. Yes, it’s a 1950s drive-in movie with no budget shot on video (with some 16mm from the first pass at making it) with rubber suits, early CGI and untrained actors. Revel in it. Soak it up. We should all be so lucky to live in a world that this movie exists and we do.

Revenge of the Chupcacabras (2005): 

Just look at that image of a humanoid chupacabra and remember 2005, a time when life was much, much simpler than today and we had no idea. We could still rent movies in stores. And yeah, things are probably more convenient today, but we also had movies with chupacabras. Two in a row, no less, from Jonathan Mumm, who directed and wrote this.

You know what’s really crazy? This movie isn’t even about a chupacabra. It’s about a kidnapping. A chupacabra shows up — and it looks better than the first movie because people whined that they got a cool looking poster and that monster wasn’t in the movie and have you people never watched an exploitation movie before?!? — but this is really about a kidnapping. I am all for the bait and switch, folks.

Also in 2005, you could kidnap an attractive college student and ask for $2 million and no one laughed at you. Today, we don’t believe in science so we would just giggle and try and negotiate the ransom.

This movie makes me want to love it and as such has a scene where a priest investigates the possessions going on in this small town and gets killed by a chupacabra and honestly, that’s all I want movies to be about.

The tagline is “It can smell your fear.” Can it also smell how happy I am to look over and see this movie on my shelf and be so happy that I own it, much less the gorgeous Visual Vengeance blu ray? You got me goat killer!

SUPPORTER DAY: The Naked Monster (2005)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Today’s movie is brought to you by AC Nicholas, who has graciously become a Big B&S’er, a monthly supporter of the site and got to pick an entire week of movies. His idea this time was for a series on movies that started as one film and were dubbed into something else.

Would you like to have me write about the movies of your choice? It’s simple!

  1. Go to our Ko-Fi site and donate. There’s no set amount and I won’t tell you what to do. In fact, if you just keep reading for free, we can still be friends.
  2. Join as a monthly member for just $1. That makes you a Little B&S’er.
  3. As a Medium B&S’er at just $3 a month, if you pick a movie or a director, I’ll write about them for you. In fact, I’ll do one for each month you subscribe and even dedicate the post to you.
  4. For $5 a month, you basically get some major power. As a Big B&S’er, I’ll write an entire week on any subject you’d like. How awesome would that be? In fact, I’ll do it for every month you’re a member. Do you think any of your other movie sites will do that for you?

The Naked Monster started in 1984 when director Ted Newsom was bet that he couldn’t make a movie for $2,500. He released the original version, Attack of the B-Movie Monster, on VHS a year later. To make it, he “hauled out the old scripts, took gags and lines and did a 25-page script which condensed things to manageable size. That version of the project was designed as a half-hour short that could be shot in about four weekends (plus the time for effects). On that basis, I asked Wayne Berwick to direct Attack of the B-Movie Monster, since I was producing and had drawn the storyboards for both the live action and effects shots.”

In 2005, a new version was made for DVD. If you watched a lot of old 1950s monster movies, you will understand so many of the references. A sheriff (R.G. Wilson), his scientist girlfriend (Brinke Stevens) and a visiting government agent (John Goodwin) discover that the Creaturesaurus erectus is back and destroying California. To help, they call upon Colonel Patrick Hendry (Kenneth Tobey, playing the same role from the original The Thing From Another World), as well as monster experts that include Clete Ferguson (John Agar from Revenge of the Creature), Major Allison (Robert Clarke from Beyond the Time Barrier), Dr. Carrington (Robert O. Cornthwaite, also reprising his The Thing from Another World part), Professor Bradshaw (Robert Shayne from Indestructible Man) and Officer Kelton (Paul Marco from Plan 9 from Outer Space). There are also appearances by Linnea Quigley, Michelle Bauer and Forrest J. Ackerman.

I would advise just understanding that this is a ZAZ Brothers style send-up of 50s monster movies and allow yourself to enjoy the rapid fire jokes and silliness. Not every one lands, but those that do are pretty good.

You can watch this on YouTube.

SUPPORTER DAY: Kung Faux (2003-2006)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Today’s movie is brought to you by AC Nicholas, who has graciously become a Big B&S’er, a monthly supporter of the site and got to pick an entire week of movies. His idea this time was for a series on movies that started as one film and were dubbed into something else.

Would you like to have me write about the movies of your choice? It’s simple!

  1. Go to our Ko-Fi site and donate. There’s no set amount and I won’t tell you what to do. In fact, if you just keep reading for free, we can still be friends.
  2. Join as a monthly member for just $1. That makes you a Little B&S’er.
  3. As a Medium B&S’er at just $3 a month, if you pick a movie or a director, I’ll write about them for you. In fact, I’ll do one for each month you subscribe and even dedicate the post to you.
  4. For $5 a month, you basically get some major power. As a Big B&S’er, I’ll write an entire week on any subject you’d like. How awesome would that be? In fact, I’ll do it for every month you’re a member. Do you think any of your other movie sites will do that for you?

Kung Faux was an action comedy TV series created by Mic Neumann that remixed martial arts movies with popular music and comic book style editing along with video game style visual effects and new storylines that had voice acting featuring contemporary art stars, hip hop personalities and pop culture icons.

Neumann described the creative process as treating the original films like a DJ treats records, “sampling the melting pot of music and demixing pop culture to assemble new collisions of sounds and palettes.” Kung Faux first appeared publicly as a narrative collection of video art film stills derived from the series that exhibited at the original Ace Hotel alongside the works of such artists as Kaws and Shepard Fairey before becoming one of the first shows on FUSE.

As if that’s not enough, the show had music and voiceovers from a diverse array of artists including De La Soul, Guru, Masta Ace, Queen Latifah, Biz Markie, Afrika Bambaataa, Eminem, Kaws, Eli Janney, Craig Wedren, Steve Powers, Aida Ruilova, Mark Ronson, Helena Christensen, Crazy Legs, MF Doom, Quasimoto, Mix Master Mike, Beastie Boys, Petter, Willi Ninja, Information Society, Elephant Man, Jean Grae, Mr. Len, Lord Sear, Roc Raida, Sadat X, Indo G, Ron Van Clief, Harold Hunter, Dimitri from Paris, Above The Law, Grooverider, Stetsasonic, Force MDs, Naughty by Nature, Scribe, P-Money, Curse, Gentleman, Assassin and Fannypack,

Here’s a breakdown of the ten episodes. The descriptions come directly from the listings for the show:

Ill Master: A chronically challenged old homie schools a young gun on the ways of a dunny that has mastered the art of not having to pay protection money.

Boxcutta: A tight cat who exterminates suckas and reps for the real with a style as sharp as a blade until he gets straight gully with a Teflon-don-dadda. Taken from The King of Boxers.

Pinky: Herbs betta recognize a kick-ass kung fu chick named Pinky Jenkins who won’t let anyone stand in the way of a mission to find her M.I.A. master.

Mini Lee: A bi-curious Bruce Lee clone enters the dragon with his own personal psychic hotline which eventually connects him to a whacked-out links lovin’ wanksta. Taken from Bruce Lee We Miss You.

Pimp Stick: Some haters make a move on an original mack’s stack when he breaks north for the annual player’s ball, but his game is tight and the streets is watchin’.

Honey Pie: A good old boy goes on a hunting trip and bags a little more than he bargained for with a sweet backwoods boo & her ill-billy clan. Remixed from Bruce Li in New Guinea.

Dirty Dee: An old school battle cat wrecks shop on the block, forcing the towns #1 break boy to get down on some dirty-deeds done dirt cheap. Original movie: Iron Fisted Warrior.

Funky Bottoms: The hip hop music biz is dog eat dog competition where punks jump up to get beat down, so don’t hate the player, hate the game. The real movie is Amsterdam Connection.

Queenie: From around the way girl to killer queen bee, a local hoodrat has to grow up fast when a Japanese Elvis shakes the family tree with some Jailhouse Rock. The real movie is Life and Death.

Break Boy: Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo lives on in this bizarro style tribute, when a hip hop hating heavy tries to squash the local community center run by an aspiring break master and his #1 pop lockin’ student. This movie is actually Bruce Lee’s Secret.

I’ve also found the soundtrack to the show on Futonrevolution’s YouTube page, which is a wealth of information on this show.

Have you seen this show? What did you think? It doesn’t always work for me but feels like it’d be fun to have on at parties.