Box Office Failures Week: Jonathan Livingston Seagull (1973)
For years, I’ve wanted to see this movie and it’s eluded me. I shop at The Exchange stores often and the one in Monroeville had one of the Warner Archive burn on demand disks. I watched it like, well, a seagull for about a year. It was $12. Surely I wasn’t going to spend so […]
Beyond the Law (2019)
I feel like I finally have made it as a movie reviewer. That’s because I was just sent a Steven Seagal film to review. Seriously, I have been clawing for this pinnacle and here I stand on it. And let me tell you, this sensation is pretty sweet. First off, two bits of sad news. […]
Box Office Failures Week: Catwoman (2004)
Covering this movie feels like shooting fish in a barrel, so let me say something mean about myself before I go full-on this film: whenever I let go of a particular powerful burst of flatulence, I like to yell out, “Benjamin Bratt!” I feel better for telling you. I love when Oscar winners follow up […]
Stan the Man (2020)
Stan Mann (Steven Chase, who also wrote and directed) is a multi-millionaire whose life is only about ladies, gambling and booze. He lives at a 5-star hotel where the staff tends to his every need. Yet at his heart, he’s a generous man that people seem to love. However, after getting messed up in a […]
Box Office Failures Week: Movie 43 (2013)
I have a weakness for movies like The Kentucky Fried Movie and Amazon Women on the Moon. Big huge paens to MAD Magazine stupidity, they’re the cinematic equivalent of Fiddle Faddle to me. Then there’s Movie 43, a movie that took a decade-long odyssey to get made, as most studios rejected the script. The end result was shot over […]
Alien Outbreak (2020)
A small rural community has been quarantined by aliens as two police officers — including an expatriate from Toronto — fight to keep the peace. But with mass panic spreading and strange behavior the order of the day, saving this small British town may be impossible. This film is from British FX artist Neil […]
Box Office Failures Week: Zyzzyx Road (2006)
Editor’s Desk: Upon the news of his medical hardships, we’ve seen an uptick in our reviews of Tom Sizemore films, which is no way for anyone to discover an actor’s films. Regrettably, Tom—whose credits included the major studio films A Matter of Degrees, Natural Born Killers, True Romance, and Black Hawk Down—has died at the […]
Box Office Failures Week: Gods of Egypt (2016)
Remember Alex Proyas? He directed The Crow and the promise of that movie led to chance after chance, with films like I, Robot and Knowing baffling folks and still making money. He also made Dark City, a movie that I’m still kind of shocked emerged out of Hollywood. And in trivia that only my pal R. D Francis would […]
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