“You unlock this door with a key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension; a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, and a dimension of mind. You are moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You have just crossed over into The Twilight Zone.”

From 1959 to 1964, Rod Serling brought not just horror into American homes, but social commentary thanks to his pivotal program, The Twilight Zone. Sadly, Serling died in 1975, so instead of him, this film uses Burgess Meredith as its narrator, which makes sense, as he starred in four episodes of the original series.

This anthology film remakes three classic episodes and also features one original story. John Landis directed the prologue and the first segment, Stephen Spielberg directed the second, Joe Dante the third, and George Miller directed the fourth. Originally, all four stories would cross over, but this film had, well, problems.

Let’s get the elephant out of the room now: this movie killed Vic Morrow and two child actors, Myca Dinh Le and Renee Shin-Yi Chen, during a helicopter stunt directed by Landis. There was a major trial, but no criminal charges were ever ruled on. Plus, the two child actors “were hired in violation of California law, which prohibits child actors from working at night or in proximity to explosions, and requires the presence of a teacher or social worker.” They were paid under the table. They did not sign a waiver.

The late night stunt involved a helicopter navigating fireballs that the pilot had issues navigating. A technician on the ground had no clue that he was having problems, so he kept detonating charges, which causes the low flying helicopter to spin out of control and land right on top of the three actors, decapitating Morrow and Le and crushing Chen.

Supposedly, before the scene, Morrow said to a Production Assistant, “I must be out of my mind to be doing this. I should’ve asked for a stunt double. What can they do but kill me, right?!” He’d had a premonition he’d die in a helicopter crash and while he was filming Dirty Mary Crazy Larry, he insisted on a one million dollar life insurance policy before he would shoot any scenes riding in a helicopter.

The crash also ended the friendship between Spielberg and Landis.

If we can, let’s move on to the actual film. In the wraparound story, Something Scary, Albert Brooks picks up Dan Aykroyd and they discuss their favorite episodes of the original show before Aykroyd becomes a monster and attacks Brooks. This Landis-written and directed segment leads directly into the first story, Time Out, Morrow plays a racist man who suddenly must travel through the history of 20th century racism. It’s brutally dark, yet originally had a happier ending with his character being redeemed. The accident changed all of that.

During the Vietnam part of this story, there is the mention of a Lieutenant Neidermeyer getting fragged by his own troops. Obviously, this is a reference to Landis’ Animal House.

Kick the Can is the Spielberg segment of the film and concerns senior citizens all becoming young again. Scatman Crothers is a welcome sight here, but this segment always makes me think of the worst of Spielberg and none of his vision.  That said, you can’t really blame him. He was so upset about the Landis segment, which was already filmed, that he shot this sequence in six days so he could be free of his contractual obligations.

It’s a Good Life remakes the original episode but adds the lunatic wonder of Joe Dante’s directorial eye. Here, a young boy named Anthony has kept his family living in fear, as anything he can imagine becomes real. There’s a ton of effects here and I’d compared this segment to an over the top funhouse ride after the dour and syrupy takes presented before.

Finally, Mad Max director George Miller takes John Lithgow where William Shatner once was — Nightmare at 20,000 Feet. There, he’s menaced by a creature on the wing that only he can see. After being driven insane, he’s carted off in an ambulance that’s also driven by Aykroyd, bringing the movie full circle.

We’re barely five minutes into The Throne of Fire when one of the main characters promises his mother that he will live up to being Satan’s son by massacring women and children. Yep. I’m sold. Let’s do this — a rare sword and sorcery film with a female central character, in this case, Princess Valkari who is played by Sabrina Siani. Ms. Siani may be best known to maniacs like me for playing Oncron in Lucio Fulci’s fog-drenched barbarian saga, Conquest. 

Director Franco Prosperi probably made this at the same time as Gunan, King of the Barbarians, as he recycled much of the cast, including Pietro Torrisi who plays Sebastian here.

Everyone is battling Mora,  the son of the devil’s messenger Belial, who wants to sit on the throne of evil on the day of the night in the day. Modern people would refer to this an eclipse. But if he doesn’t marry the princess first, he’ll die.

Luckily, Sebastian has similar powers and can also turn invisible, so he’s on hand to help the princess. There’s also a Well of Madness and lots of people get to sit on the Throne of Fire, which makes them go up in flames. Perhaps you’d not want to sit on said chair.

Will you like this movie? Well, that depends. How well do you do with Italian barbarian movies? Are you a red blooded heterosexual man who would like to watch Sabrina Siani? Are you a red blooded homosexual man who wants to watch men go bare chested? Do you want to watch lots of people get immolated? Then hurry on down to The Throne of Fire!

You can get this from Revok and VHSPS.

What happens when Bruno Mattei and Claudio Fragrasso ripoff — remake — The Magnificent Seven/The Seven Samurai with gladiators and barbarians instead of cowboys and, well, samurai? This was originally going to be Hercules, according to Variety, but Luigi Cozzi took over that one and supposedly was brought in to save this one.

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x582jf6

The plot here — again, it’s the same movie as the other two films that gather seven heroes — is about Nicerote (Dan Vadis, a former member of the Mae West Muscle Review who played Hercules in Hercules the invincible, Roccia in The Ten Gladiators movies and appeared in several Clint Eastwood movies), a bandit leader and his sorceress mother who makes yearly raids on a peasant village. But this year, Pandora (Carla Ferrigno, who was Athena in Hercules and also in Black Roses) and the women of the village have found a magic sword and go off to hire a hero who can use it and anyone else who can finally end the annual destruction of their homes.

Now, the mighty barbarian Han (Lou Ferrigno) wields the mystical Sword of Achilles and soon assembles a team of gladiators to help him win the day. There’s Scipio (Brad Harris, who played Goliath, Hercules and Samson in past peblum films, as well as Durango and Sabata), Julia (Sybil Danning, the real draw of this film, playing the Harry Luck Magnificent Seven character), Goliath (Emilio Messina, Lepto from The Ten Gladiators), Festo (Giovanni Cianfriglia, who played Superargo in two movies) and more.

However, you may wonder how a movie with Lou Ferrigno throwing rocks at people and Sybil Danning being, well, Sybil Danning, is so boring. It’s an amazing feat. I’ve tried to watch this twice and both times barely made it. It’s a great idea with poor execution, sadly.
You can get this from Revok.

I love Hercules movies. From Steve Reeves to the Bava helmed Hercules in the Haunted World, some of the most entertaining films I’ve watched have been about the adventures of the son of Zeus and Alcmene. I’ve probably already related how much I love the movies of Luigi Cozzi, too. From Starcrash to Contamination, his movies never let you down. They’re ridiculous spectacles, packed with stop animation, bombastic scores and increasingly insane plots. I feel bad for anyone who dislikes either Hercules or Cozzi movies. And woe be to anyone who dislikes this one!

Following the success of Conan the Barbarian, this was an opportunity for the Italian film industry to return to the peblum sword and sorcery films that they once did so well decades before.

Originally announced to be directed by Bruno Mattei from a Claudio Fragrasso script (it was shot at the same time as Seven Magnificent Gladiators, which does boast the talents of both), Hercules stars Lou Ferrigno from TV’s The Incredible Hulk.

You have to respect any movie that doesn’t start with people and instead is all about Pandora’s Jar. That’s right — it wasn’t a box. It was made up of all the elements — night, day, matter and air — which aren’t really elements. It blew up and made the planets. Look — if you’re going to start questioning logic, there’s no way you’re going to enjoy this movie.

Pandora’s Jar led to the creation of Earth, but it also led to evil being set loose to have its way on the world. So Zeus decides to create a symbol of goodness in his son Hercules. By the way, instead of living on Mt. Olympus, the Pantheon lives on the moon and are played by some of the heavy hitters of Italian cinema: Rossana Podesta as Hera, Delia Boccardo as Athena, Eva Robin’s as Dedalos and Claudio Cassinelli as Zeus himself!

Much like Moses, baby Hercules’ parents are murdered and he’s sent on a raft to safety. Unlike Moses, lil’ Herc kills two snakes with his bare hands. And then he’s raised in a simple village, where things are pretty simple until a bear kills his father. Hercules responds by throwing the bear into space and turning it into stars. I can’t do this scene any justice. You just have to see it for yourself.

Hercules ends up in conflict with King Minos (William Berger, who was in seven Jess Franco movies) and Ariadne (Sybil Danning!), who force him to do things like clean up horse stables. Our hero also falls in love with Cassiopeia while battling the mechanical monsters that Minos has under his command.

Hercules ends up getting help from Circe, a witch who is played by Mirella D’Angelo from Tenebre. She’s way more interesting and attractive than Cassiopeia, but she’s also a witch and therefore, doomed to fall in love with the big lug and die as a result. Oh yeah — Bobby Rhodes shows up as Xenodama, the King of Africa!

At the end of it all, Hercules must rescue his love from the fires of the Phoenix, as well as a clockwork centaur. He then doesn’t believe that she is Cassiopeia. He asks if she is Ariadne or Circe playing a trick. She responds that she is all of and none of those women and they embrace, with their silhouettes being framed against the heavens.

There are so many moments in this movie that are going to make you feel like you’re on drugs, like every time Hercules punches things lighting comes out of his hands. But man, there is so much awesome in here, like the whole ride across the river Styx, every single monster, the sets and the outfits that the ladies wear. This is a movie made for entertainment and shutting off your brain. It does its job very well.

You can get this on blu ray from Shout! Factory.

Krull should have been a blockbuster. But seriously, it’s a mess. A glorious mess. It’s like the craziest game of Dungeons & Dragons you ever played, filled with info about magic and strange lands. It has the most awesome weapon ever seen in probably any movie ever, the Glaive. It has monsters that look amazing. But it also has a somewhat boring hero and heroine surrounded by much more interesting friends. And it’s long and nonsensical.

Yet I love it. I’ve watched it so many times and every single viewing, I love it more and more while being fully aware of its faults. It’s that kind of movie, I guess.

Director Peter Yates (Bullit; Mother, Jugs and Speed; The Deep; Breaking Away; The Dresser) described making Krull as “complicated” and “enormous”. Special effects artist Brian Johnson took that even further, saying that Yates hated working on the film so much that in the middle of shooting, he took a vacation to the Caribbean for three weeks. Yet when he took on the project, he was excited. His previous films were all realistic and he considered Krull a challenge since he would have to rely on imagination and experimentation.

The movie begins with a narrator (Freddie Jones, Goodbye Gemini, Son of Dracula) telling of a prophecy:

“This, it was given to me to know…that many worlds have been enslaved by the Beast and his army, the Slayers. And this, too, was given me to know…that the Beast would come to our world, the world of Krull, and his Black Fortress would be seen in the land. That the smoke of burning villages would darken the sky, and the cries of the dying echo through deserted valleys. But one thing I cannot know, whether the prophecy be true, that a girl of ancient name shall become queen, that she shall choose a king, and that together they shall rule our world, and that their son shall rule the galaxy.”

On the day of Prince Colwyn and Princess Lyssa’s wedding that will unite the warring kingdoms of Krull, the Beast and his army of demonic Slayers arrive in the Black Fortress, a mountain of a spacecraft. They kill both kings, destroy both armies and leave with the princess.

The injured Prince Colwyn is brought back by Ynyr, the Old One (also played by Freddie Jones) who tells him of the legend of the Glaive, a legendary weapon that can kill the Beast. Colwyn and Ynry form a party with the magician Ergo (David Battley, Mr. Turkentine from Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory) and nine criminals who are undertaking the mission to clear their names: the multi-married axe-wielding Kegan (a super young Liam Neeson), Torquil, Rhun (Robbie Coltrane), dagger-loving Bardolph, bo staff user Oswyn, Menno and Darro the whip users, net throwing Nennog (stuntman Bronco McLoughlin) and Quain the archer. They’re soon joined by Rell the cyclops (Bernard Bresslaw, who is also in Hawk the Slayer) and set off to the home of the Emerald Seer and his assistant Titch to see where the Black Fortress will rise.

No sooner than the Emerald Seer finds it, the Beast’s hand rises and crushes his crystal. The Beast and his Slayers are tenacious, killing everyone they can, including Darro, Menno and the Seer, even taking on the scryer’s form before he’s uncovered. That evil Beast even tries to get a woman to seduce Colwyn, but our hero is a little too smart for that.

Meanwhile, Ynyr goes to meet the Widow of the Web, who was an enchantress who had a kid with the magician before she killed their only child. She tells him where the Black Fortress will be and enough enchanted sand to make it back to tell our heroes. She’s killed by a Crystal Spider — the sand had been protecting her — just as he dies telling the band of adventurers.

Honestly, this movie is exactly like playing D&D. There’s a world of adventure and yet people keep getting killed left and right as they stumble around. That said, they do get to ride Fire Mares, which is nice. And Ergo even transforms into a tiger at one point.

Finally, Colwyn does what we wanted all along: he throws the Glaive into the Beast and then to destroy its counterattack, he and Lyssa get married and shoot fire at the monster, sending the Black Fortress into space.

Only Colwyn, Lyssa, Torquil, Oswyn, Ergo and Titch survive. The newly married couple become king and queen with Torquil being named Lord Marshal of their newly combined kingdom. As the survivors run through a field, the narrator repeats the prophecy that the son of the queen and her chosen king shall rule the galaxy.

Krull was shot on 23 sets, ten of them at Pinewood Studios including the monstrous 007 Stage. 16 Clydesdales were trained for months to be Fire Mares. Hundreds of costumes were sewn. 40 stuntmen were on hand. You’ll marvel at just how much money was thrown at a movie that has a completely incomprehensible story. It’s like a teenager got ridiculously high with all of his friends and attempted to be the dungeon master before having the giggles and passing out.

The posters said, “Beyond our time, beyond our universe . . . there is a planet besieged by alien invaders, where a young king must rescue his love from the clutches of the Beast. Or risk the death of his world. KRULL. A world light-years beyond your imagination.” I agree. I love this movie in spite of itself. It’s not afraid to be big and dumb and rambling and for that, I salute it.

You should grab the Mill Creek video store reissue of this on blu ray. The packaging is amazing and it’s a great way to get the movie cheaply. You can get it at most Walmart stores or visit their site.

My wife thinks that the only reason they made sword and sorcery movies was to basically make porn. She doesn’t realize that in 1983 the porn industry was in its VHS heydey, with films finally showing up in video stores. And that the internet didn’t exist, so for teenage boys that wanted to see some flesh, the only choice they had was to find a Penthouse magazine in the woods, sneak some Cinemax After Dark or watch these movies. Or be like me, someone that watches them specifically for the sword and sorcery!

The first of four films about the Deathstalker character, this movie is all about a quest to find a chalice, an amulet and a sword, two of which are held by the wicked sorcerer Munkar. Oh yeah — and when we meet our hero, he’s easily killing monsters and humans alike, then making out with a tied up woman. Because hey, he’s Deathstalker. You got a problem with it?

Deathstalker finds the sword first and frees the thief Salmaron, who goes with him on his quest. On the way, he learns about Munkar’s tournament, which will decide which warrior will inherit his kingdom from Oghris. There are about ten sex scenes before we get there, so my wife might be right about this porn theory. One of those sex scenes is between female warrior Kaira and Deathstalker. Kaira is played by Lana Clarkson, who was in the two Barbarian Queen films, but is perhaps better known for being shot and killed by Phil Spector.

The real reason for the tournament is that Munkar wants to take out his competition. To get them weakened, he invites them to drink and have sex with any of his harem girls before their fights, including Princess Codille (Barbi Benton, who was never a Playmate of the Month, but dated Hugh Hefner and was on the covers of the July 1969, March 1970, May 1972 and December 1985 issues, as well as being in layouts in December 1973 and January 1975; she ended up in B-movies, such as the Halloween rip off, Hospital Massacre).

Munkar is a tricky one — he sends one of his guys made up as the Princess and she fools Deathstalker until he finds that meat. That said, our hero is somewhat woke and doesn’t kill the assassin. The killer pays back that kindness by killing Kaira. I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the long transformation scene where said dude changes into Barbi Benton while his penis goes back inside his body, resulting in great pain. It goes on. And on. And then some more. Also, there’s a weird puppet creature that Munkar has, along with a tattoo on his bald head, that likes to eat the eyes of teenagers. So there’s that.

The day of the tournament — please nobody yell Mortal Kombat or Enter the Dragon or Kickboxer or Bloodsport — Salmaron is trapped in the harem (not a bad thing) and Oghris is forced to fight Deathstalker. During their fight, Oghris says that they are friends and demands that our hero leave. Instead, they fight and Oghris has the chance to kill him, but fights fairly and loses. Our hero responds by saying goodbye and killing the guy! What the hell, Deathstalker?

That would have been a better final battle than the one where Deathstalker battles an ogre, but that’s what we get. After all this work and this whole movie and all the sex, Deathstalker doesn’t want any of the magic stuff. He just destroys all of the objects of power as Salmaron leads a harem rebellion. Our hero throws Munkar to the people who rip him to pieces.

Deathstalker isn’t a great hero. He doesn’t have a great quest. He just randomly kills people who have shown him kindness and he throws all the objects of his quest away at the end because he must be some kind of nihilist. But this is one movie that’s all about the journey and not the destination. After all, there’s a great scene where the ogre hammers a man into pulpy liquid while an entire family eats a picnic lunch and cheers him on. Seriously, that scene alone earned this movie most of its decent score. And hey, if you want to see 1980’s breasts and beasts, it’s there for you.

You can watch it on Amazon Prime or get it on a Sword and Sorcery four movie set from Shout! Factory.

Who has had a crazier life than Matt Cimber? Born Thomas Vitale Ottavian, he met his first wife Jayne Mansfield when he directed her on Broadway in Bus Stop. Just think about how his other two wives felt, competing with Jayne Mansfield. Come on.

He’s directed everything from Mansfield’s last movie Single Room Furnished to The Sexually Liberated Female, a cycle of three Blaxploitation films (The Black Six, which featured six currently playing football stars in Gene Washington, a San Francisco 49er Gene Washington, Pittsburgh Steeler Joe Greene,  Miami Dolphins’ running back Mercury Morris, Detroit Lions cornerback Lem Barney, Kansas City Chiefs linebacker Willie Lanier and Minnesota Vikings defense end Carl Eller;  as well as Lady Cocoa and the Candy Tangerine Man), The Witch Who Came from the Sea and two Pia Zadora films, Fake-Out and Butterfly. He also created and directed the original Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling TV show (he’s played by Marc Maron and named Sam Sylvia in the Netflix series).

Today, we’re here to discuss Hundra, one of the two films he made with Laurene Landon (the other is Yellow Hair and the Fortress of Gold). 

Hundra is the only youngster in her tribe of Amazons who hasn’t been with a man and she has no problem letting the other ladies know. Sadly, every member of her tribe soon gets killed by barbarians and the old wise woman wants her to have kids rather than get revenge. And that means she needs a baby daddy.

One dude has bad manners and tries to kill her. Another is a thief who only wants to kill her. The other is a gay pimp. Finally, she meets a healer, but other ladies have to teach her how to seduce him. Obviously, they teach her well, because she’s soon with child until a sorcerer takes her baby and forces her into a humiliating ritual, but she soon escapes and takes everyone out.

Luckily, as the narrator tells us, the spirit of Hundra lives within women from then until now. Also, somehow, someway, Ennio Morricone was conned into doing the soundtrack for this film, which is way under his legendary talent.

Star Laurene Landon also shows up in the recently released Terror Tales, as well as The Stuff, It’s Alive III: Island of the Alive, Maniac Cop, Wicked Stepmother and many others. She’s the best part of this movie, totally devoted to the action sequences and doing every stunt except for one fall off a 180-foot building.

You can watch this on Amazon Prime.

This is a movie that starts off in a way that got me quick. A prostitute named Isabelle (pre-Baywatch Alexandra Paul) is naked in bed, smoking a joint and trying to get a man in the bathroom to come out and make love to her. He keeps washing his hands obsessively while she apologizes for some videos she appeared in. The man comes out, gets out top of her and slices her throat open. In the world of exploitation movies, this is what we call a good start.

American Nightmare isn’t from this country. It’s from our pals in Canada, where we for some reason aren’t building a wall.

Isabelle’s brother Eric is a famous musician who is coming to find his sister after she writes him — no cell phones yet — to let him know that she’s in trouble. This sends him on a journey through strip clubs, adult theaters and dens of prostitution, all to find his sister — who was killed at the beginning of the movie.

This movie is pretty scummy — when Eric confronts his father about he and his sister leaving the family, the old man kicks him out and then fondles a photo of his daughter. Is this how the Great White North sees us?

The killer starts murdering all of Isabelle’s friends, except for Louise, who Eric saves. They end up becoming lovers, because that’s how the world works in movies.

Of course, the video in question is one of Eric’s dad having sex with his sister. The reveal causes the old man to blow his brains out. This is the kind of movie my wife walks into the room and just stares and walks out angry. Then I yell, “But Michael Ironside is in it!”

In 1979, Austrian film director Walter Bannert was simply enjoying a meal at a Vienna cafe when he was beaten by a gang of neo-Nazis. That’s when he determined that he would research these groups by convincing their leaders that he was making an objective documentary. He ended up spending three years with these groups in West Germany and Austria.

The Inheritors is what emerged, a film based on real people, events and conversations that Bannert actually experienced. Obviously, the film was controversial, with theatres screening it threatened by neo-Nazi sympathizers. Sadly, while it’s over thirty years old, the rebirth of right-wing extremism means that it may even be more relevant today.

On his way home from school, Thomas helps Charly escape from the police. They couldn’t be more different, as Thomas comes from a rich home, where his self-made father and music-loving brother are both dominated by his mother. Charly is poor and doesn’t have much of a future.

Soon, the two are dreaming of a revitalized fatherland based on happy families, free from corporate control and dedicated to the environment, one that will be free from the influence of the West. They discover that they find a better family and friends within the party, as the rest of the world throws them away as they become more and more dedicated to the Nazi cause.

This is not an easy watch. But it’s certainly one that will make you think.

You can get this movie directly from Mondo Macabro.

Note: Mondo Macabro sent us this movie for review, but that doesn’t influence our review.

Nobody sees this movie as a classic. But I do. It’s from a moment of great joy, when I was 11 years old and sitting beside my father and uncle at the Majestic Theater in Ellwood City, PA, as they proceeded to laugh so loudly during this film until you could no longer hear what was being said. My memories of this movie make it mean more to me than anything in the Criterion Collection.

Montgomery “Monty” Capuletti is the role that Rodney Dangerfield felt was closest to who he really was. He lives hard, he drinks too much, he gambles and he lives to smoke pot. He’s the only Italian member of an Irish family of rich folks who own a department store, Monahan’s. He also ruins nearly everything he touches, from his job as a photographer to his daughter’s (Jennifer Jason Leigh!) wedding cake and marriage to Julio (Taylor Negron!).And his best friends — Nickey Cerone (Joe Pesci!) and Paddy (Tom Noonan!) — are just as sloppy and messed up as he is.

That’s when the film’s challenge happens. His wife’s mother dies and Monty stands to inherit all $10 million of her will if he can give up drinking, drugs and gambling, plus lose weight. Much like all great 80’s movies, I have given you the plot and simply follow with this statement: hijinks ensue.

You get so much in this film. You get real life pedo and full-time movie asshole, Jeffrey Jones, doing what he does best, be an asshole. You get Taylor Negron saying the lines that Anthrax would use in their song “I’m the Man.” You get a store that’s only open 23 hours a day. And you get the real guy look, the fashion line that Monty inspires.

Director James Signorelli only has one other movie to his credit, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark. But he has been involved in the making of Saturday Night Live off and on as a producer, plus he also worked on the crews of Black Caesar, Phantom of the Paradise and Superfly. This movie is a quick trifle, but it makes me laugh every single time. It’s running time is a blur and it always rewards multiple viewings with just as many laughs.

If you are an Amazon Prime member, you can watch it for free.