“Artificial Intelligence from far into the future arrives to immediately CLEANSE the human species of millions of humans who are harmful to other humans. A VISIONARY, REVOLUTIONARY FILM which pushes the human species to the limits of controversial, thought-provoking actions.”

As the film begins, Breen’s character lies dying in the Las Vegas desert, the victim of a group of drug smugglers and human traffickers. In his last moments, he is overtaken by a future messiah of artificial intelligence that plans on walking our world and then killing at least 300,000,000 evil people along with the help of a tiger named Vlad.

This same AI — Thigl — will also fulfill the storylines which are demanded of every Neil Breen film: he will come to the rescue of a young woman — Amanda (Kathy Corpus) and her niece Kim (Chaize Macklin), who are on the run from those human traffickers — as well as befriend a young person — two child astronomers (Abraham Rodriguez and Taylor Sydney) — and also come to grips with the forgotten people of our nation — the dying professor who is teaching those precocious astronomers (James D. Smith)  and a veteran with PTSD (Jason James).

He also finds the time to attend the cocktail parties of the rich, famous and ultracorrupt so that he can learn exactly who must die and also walks the desert to explain to us that the laws of nature mean more than the laws of man. He ends all of this by wiping out the news anchors that we have listened to throughout the movie as well as blowing up the mansion that said party was in, because why wouldn’t you nuke big pharma if you had space god AI powers?

That’s the point, I think I’ve arrived at, after five Neil Breen movies in a day. We must all become the beings that we have the potential to be and if his movies are the sand in the shell that creates the oyster, that is his role. I’ve loudly bemoaned the fact that with cameras in everyone’s phone, no one has seized the democratic nature that now exists within film, taking advantage of the opportunity that regional and shot on video filmmakers struggled so hard to attain. Yet Neil Breen does with every movie and while so many laugh or throw away insults that may them feel superior like so bad it’s good — and what does that even mean? — he’s one of the lone voices out there in the desert — the philosophical and artistic one, not the body-riddled one outside of Las Vegas — that is saying something no matter how many people decide to watch and how much even fewer deign to listen.

Neil Breen gives me hope.

Aaron Brand (Neil Breen) is the best there is at what he does. Really, he is. A mercenary killing machine who work counterterrorism assignments for both American and foreign governments, his life is ruined when his fiancee Megan (Laura Hale) is murdered while they’re in the pool together. That’s when he decides to become a terrorist himself, all while helping the world defeat other terrorists, he’s turning a car into a killing base complete with numerous hacking laptops and an invisibility device, all with the plan of unleashing anthrax in the middle of Las Vegas.

Also, all he eats is tuna. And yes, just like every other Neil Breen character, he met the love of his life at the age of seven.

But unlike so many other snarky reviews of his movie, I’m not here to make fun of the work of Breen. No, quite the opposite. I’m absolutely fascinated — and comforted — by his movies. The tics of character, the repetition of story beats, the fact that his character is absolutely impossibly skilled in a way that no human being could ever be. He’s an infallible man — or sometimes god or even God — facing off with an imperfect world so often, a world that has let him down in the most horrific ways possible and must reconcile his infinite power and need to perhaps destroy those that have wronged him with something missing, often love or connection.

This is the conundrum and duality at the heart of every Neil Breen hero. This is someone who makes millions of dollars a year for world governments keeping order yet keeps none of it, barely scraping by in the desert while he donates that money to various children support charities all over the world such as “orphanages, hospitals and schools and supporting evacuees from national disasters around the globe like hurricanes, like Katrina.” With bio-electric implants, he does things like shut down the Vegas strip — Sam’s Town probably stayed open — or kills white collar criminals, leaving the desert filled with their bodies, all while the blood money goes to the kids. Kind of like how we had to begrudgingly admire Jerry Lewis for doing his telethon despite by the end of the weekend he was snapping at his band and verbally abusing the crew on national television.

Now, you may ask, why don’t the governments of the world kill off Aaron if he’s becoming so powerful? Well, he planted bioterror bombs in seven critical cities and if anyone tries, the whole world pays. He’s the kind of good at his job that never has to go look for a new one. But you know, who else would be qualified for whatever exactly his skillset is. And if anyone tries to get to him in the desert, there’s an invisible shield that kills anyone but Aaron.

Despite being the best ever, Aaron screws up a hit and the people he was supposed to kill are so afraid that he’s after him, they end up killing themselves. Problem solved. He also meets an old man in the desert who dies in his arms. And through it all, he just wants to believe that something extraordinary is possible.

Or he’ll kill the world.

I refuse to ironically like these movies or find them to be some kind of pose. Because there’s something in these, some vision and message. Certainly they are in no way like any other movie you’ve ever seen and instead of making them fit into that box, why not open yourself up and go beyond, you know?

During their youth, Cade and his identical twin brother Cale (Neil Breen, who pretty much did every single thing possible on this movie) were abducted by aliens and transformed. They were both secret agents for some time, but Cale didn’t fit in while Cade remained, missing his brother while he protects America’s troops.

Cale is up to a mission of his own, kidnapping important business people when he isn’t doing pills with his lover Donna. There’s also Cuzzx, a man conducting a cyber attack and Alana, a girl that it seems like Cade is stalking when in truth she’s his girlfriend in a scene that pads time in a way that only Neil Breen can.

Also: Cale has the worst beard perhaps in the history of beards which makes me love him.

Cuzzx has all these people hooked up to VR goggles — yell it with me, programmable virtual reality! — and he kills a homeless man who is friends with Cade, just as Cale and Donna break up and she tracks down Cade and asks where his beard went and also, can he get her some drugs?

Neither of the brothers can pick a girlfriend, because Alana has been in the employ of Cuzzx all along and she shoots him, but somehow he survives. She goes into a virtual world to say goodbye to him and he forgives her. Cade then tells us that we will all live in a VR world some day.

A movie shot over stock footage and greenscreens, Twisted Pair feels like it has to be a stunt but no, this is how Neil Breen makes movies. I haven’t seen the sequel, Cade: The Tortured Crossing, but I don’t think my life will have meaning until I do.

I really love Breen’s movies, if you didn’t pick up on that yet. They become comforting when you get used to the word patterns and the repeating motifs of great power, childhood loss and greatness being achieved in adulthood. According to his site, he can also design and sell your house. I can’t even imagine.

Neil Breen is an auteur. And it doesn’t matter if you hate every single one of his movies, but you have to admit that he’s putting everything there is up there on the screen and I don’t feel like it’s an act. You’re getting all of him, no matter what that is.

His movies often revolve around the same themes. The government has been corrupted by rich people. Breen is the lead and he has been given near-omnipotent powers that will allow him to either save the world or destroy it. Also: He falls in love at the age of seven and it should last forever, except he’s either separated from this love of his life or she’s murdered. He has some crisis of faith and screams by himself for several scenes, but never forgets to remind us how many medals he’s won or how good he is at what he does or that no one can stop him.

He’s crowdfunded a lot of his movies, but before that, he was using money from real estate or being an architect to make them happen. He told Influx, “So, the myth was created years ago that I’m this wealthy real estate guy, which is not the truth.  I kept that real estate license active for only a year.  I have never made any serious money through real estate.  So, what I’m getting at is that this myth of real estate mega guy has been perpetuated for no reason.”

But as much as I’d love to speak to Breen and learn all about his movies, maybe I also feel like having them speak for themselves. They really defy any sort of convention or box. I don’t even know if I can put all of the ideas in this movie into one article, but really, should I? I just want you to experience this movie with the open mind and heart that I did.

Dylan (Breen) met Leah, the love of his life, when he was a child, but she had to move away. Before that, they found a black rock hidden in a chest and he kept it with him for the rest of his life. As an adult, he’s become a famous author with just one book but is nearly killed in a car accident. His friend when he was a child ends up being the nurse that treats him and he comes back to life with a mission: he’s going to hack into every corrupt government computer in the world and release the answers to who is on the take. Along the way, the system will addict his wife Emily to drugs, his best friend Jim will be killed by his wife Andy and it will be explained as a suicide, said best friend’s daughter will continually try to have sex with him and he will fall back in love with Leah. Literally, the moment that they kiss, Emily dies of an overdose.

There are so many scenes of Dylan screaming at computers and let me tell you, I relate. I have never hacked one by spilling coffee all over it, but I am not Neil Breen either. I can also explain the ending as much as I can and you still won’t be ready for it.

The thing about Breen’s movies is that wherever he stumbles as a filmmaker, there’s no chance of his work becoming boring or trite. They are infinitely his own vision, however alien that may seem to the rest of humanity that gets to watch these films. Every film is a miracle just for being completed and the fact that he’s made several and that they all present such a cinematic universe of sorts without falling into parody — they feel parody-proof — or him becoming self-aware. I hope that Breen keeps on making his films, because we need people like him that exist to make movies because, well, they just plan love making movies. It’s a dream. Even if that dream is to portray twin secret agents who know who controls the world or God walking to Las Vegas sure he’s going to destroy the world.