October 11: A Horror Film That Features Many Tentacles

Tentacles usually menace women, but in Decoys, directed by Matthew Hastings, who wrote this with Tom Berry, men deal with being knocked up by evil aliens.

In what other movie would you see men made icey from the inside out and their mouths open in a death mask of sheer horror? And oh yeah, they still have boners after the end. Yes, these female aliens are sick of dudes being the ones who want to have sex with their throats and are turning the sexual battleground on them.

This movie looks like a teen sex comedy more than a horror movie. I think that’s probably why it’s so surprising when the attractive girls that two college guys meet in a laundromat turn out to have tentacles that emerge from their breasts.

The one constant in all alien battles is that man has invented the flame thrower and this will be our best weapon in the war against titty extraterrestrials.