Tales from the Darkside S2 E4: Parlour Floor Front (1985)

After a few light entries in the series, “Parlour Floor Front” marks a welcome return to the grim, ironic horror that defined the show’s peak. 

The undisputed highlight here is Adolph Caesar as Mars. Caesar was a titan of the industry, legendary for his booming, authoritative baritone. While he is immortalized as the voice of the United Negro College Fund’s “A mind is a terrible thing to waste” campaign and dozens of iconic movie trailers, his on-screen presence was equally formidable (earning an Oscar nod for A Soldier’s Story).

In this episode, he radiates a quiet, dangerous dignity. As the long-term tenant of a stunning apartment, Linda (Donna Bullock) sees him not as a human being, but as an obstacle to her plan. She is the quintessential 80s social climber, willing to use psychological warfare to get what she wants. Her husband, Doug (John Calonius), is happy for the help that Mars gives him in fixing up the place. But she keeps pushing, not knowing that the old man does voodoo and should not be treated this poorly.

Richard Friedman, who directed this episode, also made Phantom of the MallDoom Asylum and Scared Stiff. This episode was written by Carole Lucia Satrina, who scripted three of Cannon’s fairy tale films: Puss in Boots, Red Riding Hood and Beauty and the Beast.

This has a fantastic ending, and it’s nice to see the series return to horror rather than silliness.

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