Peter Hewitt directed Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey, Garfield and Thunderbirds, so who knows what he got into when he made this, the fifth Home Alone movie, made for the Disney Channel. It’s written by Aaron Ginsburg and Wade McIntyre and doesn’t have the McCallister family but instead a new kid named Finn Baxter (Christian Martyn) who plays video games all the time.

The bad guys are three thieves, Sinclair (Malcolm McDowell), Jessica (Debi Mazar) and Hughes (Eddie Steeples). I remember when I was young and I believed that McDowell was someone who brought prestiege to a movie. Now I realize that much like the man whose role he assumed for Rob Zombie, McDowell is the Donald Pleasence of today. I mean, he’s not Eric Roberts, but very close.

This was going to be called Home Alone: Alone in the Dark which sounds way too dark, right? It also references to all the other films even though its character is in no way connected to them, so it makes you wonder why you’re watching this movie instead of those movies, which is not how a sequel should leave you feeling.