Profumo (1987)

Man, I don’t know if this is strictly a giallo or just plain sleaze. But hey, I watched it, you’re going to read it and then we’ll all go about our way. Seriously, I always thought The Devil’s Honey had the most ridiculous sex scenes in an a quasi-giallo and here we are with Profumo, which has nothing to do with the British sex and politics scandal, and was also known as Bizarre.

Florence Guérin (Top ModelFacelessToo Beautiful to DieThe Black Cat) plays Laurie, a woman who is pretty much haunted by a violent lover named Corbi. No matter how far away from him she gets, he always pulls her back in.

Yet now she’s found a new lover named Edward (Robert Egon, the only actor I can think of who is in a Marvel movie*, My Own Private Idaho and two Fulci films**, Massacro and Sodoma’s Ghost), who she feminizes and sodomizes when she isn’t pouring Coca-Cola all over his pubes and licking it off. Yes, this is that kind of movie.

Corbi is never far behind, sending men to attack Laurie and Edward before she decides to take matters into her own hands. But is she strong enough to leave him? Even sixteen years after The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh, giallo heroines are still having trouble dumping the abusive men who give them the kink they need. Oh Laurie. Your vice is a locked door.

Frankly, I’m shocked Severin has put this out yet, but this may be because not that many people know about it. Maybe we can do something about that. I’ve honestly never seen Russian roulette used as foreplay before, so I guess that late model giallo has wonderful things to teach us all.

*To be fair, it’s just the Cannon Captain America.

**You could say three, as he also shows up in the mashup of these movies, Cat in the Brain.

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