NOTE: We shared this movie last year when it was called Impossible Mission. It’s being re-released with this new title.
Rosa is a master assassin who is great at poisoning people. Now, she’s set up on a final mission where she is asked to kill a spiritual leader who keeps hacking into cable signals during the news and major soccer matches. However, she might face an even greater threat from those within her own organization.
Soon, Rosa and operative Will Gray have teamed up to sniff and snuff out that leader, but their romance may also get in the way of the mission. This movie has an interesting concept and a great beginning as Rosa slowly works a target to sleep via poison, but when you want it to be filled with action, it really starts to slow down.
This is Jimena Gala first movie and she really does well in it. I’d like to see her in more, as she seemed exceedingly confident despite this being the sole credit on her IMDB page.
You can find this movie on demand and on DVD.
DISCLAIMER: This movie was sent to us — two times now — by its PR agency.
Human beings are horrible. That’s the biggest truth I’ve ever revealed on this site. And in The Alpha Test, a suburban family has their new Alpha Home Assistant for just a few days before they’ve driven it off the deep end, killing everyone before the opening credits.
This is why I never want a robot maid.
Writer/director Aaron Mirtes was also behind American Hunt, Clowntergeist and Curse of the Nun. This movie is very influenced by Ex Machina, except that the robot here is so frightening looking that I’d never allow it a block from my house, much less inside it.
The Alpha Test is available March 10 from High Octane Pictures.
DISCLAIMER: We were sent this movie by its PR team.
Abbey Bell is a distraught mother (Melinda Page Hamilton) who lives in fear of her teenage son Jacob (Bailey Edwards). And while he doesn’t fit the profile of a serial killer, she remains convinced that her son is a serial killer in the making. However, she may be insane. Only a series of spy cameras and plenty of found footage can tell us the truth.
Abbey believes that Jacob is planning a school shooting. What’s her evidence, other than the fact that her son plays way too many video games and has a pet named Adolph? Well, eventually, she gets some evidence thanks to those omnipresent video cameras.
What’s better? A mother’s love or a mother’s innate knowledge that her son may be a killer? However, Jacob has a deep and buried family secret that he’s ready to use against his mother, who may not survive this experience.
How did they get Ed Asner to show up in this? Well, there he is, playing Dr. Howard Arden, who is trying to help get to the bottom of this.
M.O.M. Mother of Monsters has its world premiere on Friday the 13th at the Arena Cinelounge in Los Angeles with its digital rollout to soon follow.
DISCLAIMER: We were sent this movie by its PR team.
This movie threw me for a loop. It starts like a Waiting to Exhale story of a black woman heading to Mexico to find true love and then starts taking on notes from Hollywood execs to reveal that it’s really the tale of a writer trying to sell her script.
As Zoe’s movie slowly becomes whitewashed, we get to watch a better, more realistic movie without stereotypes. The goal of the movie was “portraying a universal humanity rather than categories of difference.”
The end result lives up to that lofty aim. It was written and directed by Jennifer Sharp, who is a talent to watch. You can learn more at Una Great Movie at the official Facebook page.
DISCLAIMER: This movie was sent to me by October Coast. It’s still playing festivals, but keep your eyes open for it to be released soon.
Originally called Silent Place, this thriller is all about a family heading off to grandma’s house, only to soon discover that the entire town has been killed by an amphibious monster. Well, before you can say, “Hey wait, weren’t they nice in The Shape of Water?” the family is under attack, too.
Scott Jeffrey, who wrote and directed this movie, directed the recent Cupid that we reviewed, as well as acting as the producer of films like Witches of Amityville Academy (I’m never going to be free of these Amityville movies), Pet Graveyard and House On Elm Lake.
They keep making these movies. And by some whim of fate, I keep watching them. Do you like low budget horror where monsters wipe out families? Good news! The monster is not Gwen Stefani or Tony Kanal, despite the title.
Don’t Speak is available on demand and on DVD March 10 from Uncork’d Entertainment.
DISCLAIMER: We were sent this movie by its PR team.
$165 million worldwide against a production budget of $175 million. Yep, that’s a box office failure.
Yet the 1967 film that preceeded this one is also one of the biggest failures in movie history. It tripled its original budget, ballooning to $17 million ($132 million in today’s money). And the movie only made back $9 million. Despite the negative reaction to that movie, 20th Century Fix lobbied for the film at the Academy Awards, where it was nominated for Best Picture and won for Best Original Song and Best Visual Effects. They went so far as to offer sixteen consecutive nights of free screenings of the film at the studio lot, along with dinner and champagne, to Academy members.
That movie was a complete mess to make, as star Rex Harrison disliked co-star Anthony Newley. According to Mark Harris’ Pictures at A Revolution: Five Movies and the Birth of a New Hollywood, Harrison decided to vent his jealousy of Newley by using anti-Semetic slurs in the actor’s direction. At one point — due to this and his insistence on singing live versus lip synching — Harrison was fired and replaced by Christopher Plummer. Then, Harrison came back and Plummer still needed to be paid. To top that off, Geoffrey Holder, who played William Shakespeare the Tenth, the leader of Sea Star Island, was subjected to racial namecalling by members of Harrison’s entourage.
Does it get worse? The animals often bit and crapped all over cast members. And some of the ducks literally forgot how to swim and almost drowned. Then, as they were shooting the giant pink sea snail at Marigot Bay, Saint Lucia, the natives — angered by a stomach bug caused by snails that had sickened the island’s children earlier that year — began to stone the giant snail. Around that time, producer Arthur P. Jacobs has a heart attack.
Finally, when they got back to California, Harrison insisted on re-recording all of his songs live on set. This would later cause even more headaches, as the orchestra would have to record the songs again later to match his speed.
So when you look at all of those issues — Eddie Murphy’s Doolittle remake earned around $300 million on a $70 million dollar budget and spawned two canon sequels and two spin-offs, so it doesn’t count in this discussion — you may realize that this movie isn’t anywhere near the bomb that the original film was.
This movie has all the hallmarks of a bomb. And if you’ve learned anything during this week of box office failures, you know that movies show the signs of bombdom long before they play the silver screen.
Here’s a good one: three weeks of reshoots, along with Syriana director Stephen Gaghan needing a second director’s help (Jonathan Liebesman, whose record of Battle: Los Angeles, Wrath of the Titans, 2014’s Worst Director Razzie-winning Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles suggests that maybe, just maybe, a better third director may have been needed) and writer Chris McKay (the LEGO movies) writing new comedic scenes, as most of the humor was falling flat. There was also the hope that Seth Rogen and Brendan O’Brien would pitch in, but they couldn’t commit to the film. Oh yeah — The Lego Batman Movie writer John Whittington tried to write some new scenes, but his work was shredded by star Robert Downey Jr.
As for Downey Jr., he based his lead role on Welsh neo-pagan physician William Price. One of the reasons? He didn’t want to do another British accent. Yes, the pioneer of cremation in the UK was the inspiration for the lead character in a children’s movie. Cool story.
The biggest sign that this was a lit fuse waiting to die in theaters? It kept getting moved. First, it was moved so that it wouldn’t compete with the latest Star Wars film (which also got moved and is a failure story in and out of itself), then it was placed in theaters in January, traditionally the graveyard for movies that studios want to wipe off their shoes.
So how is it?
Well, I didn’t hate it. That’s a victory.
A lot of the credit for that goes to the great voice talent. This may be the only movie credit that Emma Thompson and Ralph Fiennes share with John Cena and Jason Mantzoukas, but such is life.
But I never understand movies where we’re supposed to fall in love with a hero who wants nothing to do with being a hero. It’s like the lead has already made some progress through the hero’s journey, yet we’ve missed all the good moments and start off in the dreaded third act. I remember as a child, watching Popeye in a theater, and wondering why Robin Williams’ version of the role hated spinach and didn’t want anything to do with saving the day. I kind of felt the same way here, but it comes together.
It’s odd to see Ralph Ineson in a kid-friendly movie after I associate his voice with The VVitch so much, but again, life’s weird. And it’s always nice to see Antonio Banderas in a movie, even if it’s a minor role. That said — Nicholas Cage was supposed to play that part and I would have lost my mind of he showed up in this movie.
This isn’t the kind of movie that’s going to change your life. But shouldn’t some movies just be trifles? Silly bits of fun? Maybe they don’t need to cost this much and demand this much work, but that’s what box office failure week is all about.
Stan Mann (Steven Chase, who also wrote and directed) is a multi-millionaire whose life is only about ladies, gambling and booze. He lives at a 5-star hotel where the staff tends to his every need. Yet at his heart, he’s a generous man that people seem to love. However, after getting messed up in a gambling scheme, he loses everything with one bet. And then, well, he gets shot.
Stan was planning on drinking himself to death, but now he’s been critically wounded in a liquor store robbery. The bullet he takes was meant for the store clerk, so an angel gives him thirty days to fix his life and find his one true love.
Katherine Kelly Lang, who has been Brooke Logan on The Young and the Restless and The Bold and the Beautiful, is in this. She was also in Skatetown, U.S.A. and Evilspeak.
This movie is available on demand from Avail Films.
DISCLAIMER: We were sent this movie by its PR team.
A small rural community has been quarantined by aliens as two police officers — including an expatriate from Toronto — fight to keep the peace. But with mass panic spreading and strange behavior the order of the day, saving this small British town may be impossible.
This film is from British FX artist Neil Rowe and has plenty of great visuals despite its small budget. I liked that it has a very claustrophobic and dark look, which befits the end of the world nature of the story. The mechanical devices the alien uses and the main humanoid one appear quite otherworldly. It’s an effective film and just by virtue of its effects, it stands above the majority of most direct to streaming movies.
Alien Outbreak is available on demand and on DVD from High Octane Pictures.
DISCLAIMER: We were sent this movie by its PR company.
William Brent Bell directed the original The Boy, a movie that pleasantly surprised us when it was released in 2016. This follow-up has been on our radar for some time, yet has been knocked around schedule-wise. Originally set to play theaters in July and December 2019, it finally made its way to the graveyard of films that are the first two months of the year.
I wanted to absolutely adore this movie, but I walked away only liking it. That’s because the beauty of its predecessor was that while it seemed like a supernatural film, there was an even more unsettling reality as to why Brahms, the porcelain boy, could move, communicate and impact his surroundings.
In this installment, the film goes all-in on the otherworldly, sometimes to its credit (the gleefully unhinged look of the villain once his face has been destroyed) and often to its detriment.
In all elevated horror, it seems that the true enemy isn’t the gnawing unknown existing just on the side of our consciousness, but bad marriages and worse parenting. Liza (Katie Holmes, of whom my wife inquired, “Why is she doing this movie?”) and Sean seem as if they’ve had a divide between them since their son Jude was born. He’s a sensitive soul, the kind that enjoys pranking his mother for no good reason before a home invasion renders their lives worse than it was before.
Between Liza’s head injuries, Jude getting shellshocked and Sean seeming not to care at all, the family moves to the country. Obviously, money is not one of their dilemmas. Settling in at the guest house of the first film’s Heelshire estate, they soon meet Jospeh (Ralph Ineson, who post-The Vvitch is the go-to for strangely off UK-based character acting).
Moments later, Jude has stopped his precious handwriting instead of speaking and unearthed Brahms from his earthen grave. While Jude’s therapist sees having the plaything as a positive at first, by the end of the film, the rules of owning Brahms have led to a brutal game of croquet and canine decimation.
While the film has a call back scene to the drowning in the first movie, you don’t need to know that story to watch this. Neither Laura Cohan or James Russell returned, due to scheduling conflicts and not wanting the role.
This will probably be streaming by the time I finish writing this review, but it was a pleasant enough filmgoing experience. There’s an end sequence that reminded me of the much more harrowing doll scene in Argento’s Deep Red, but I really did enjoy the closing moments.
So few modern horror films get the opportunity to become franchises, compared to the movies of my teen years. Brahms: The Boy II engages in world building and trying to place a reason for all the madness, but in my opinion, the unanswered nature of the first film was a much more horrific experience.
John Thomas (David Chokachi, Baywatch) is faced with his daughter Lisa’s (Marialisa Caruso, who contributed writing to the movie) mounting medical bills and issues at home with his wife (Yancy Butler, Witchblade). That leads him to be part of his father-in-law’s plan to smuggle jewels across the U.S./Mexico border. Things go wrong and he’s left for dead. Can he find his way back to life?
We featured the trailer for Emerald Run a few weeks ago. Now, we have had the chance to watch the movie.
This movie was produced by Anthony Caruso, who also served as the executive story editor. His career started with acting, moved into real estate and then he found his way to reality TV. This is the first film he’s produced and this was directed by Eric Etebari, who played Ian Nottingham on Witchblade opposite Butler.
The cast is packed with people you’ll recognize. There’s Steven Williams, who hunted down Jason in Jason Goes to Hell as Creighton Duke. John Schneider from TV’s Dukes of Hazzard. Chris Mulkey, who has been in everything from Whiplash to Cloverfield. And perhaps most exciting for readers of this site, Michael Pare from Streets of Fire and Vernon Wells, who is one of the best movie villains ever.
Emerald Run will be in a hundred U.S. theaters as of February 21. You can learn more about the film and where it’s playing at the official Facebook page.
DISCLAIMER: This film was sent to us by its PR company.
B&S About Movies 