Droid (1988)

Droid is a science fiction movie created by British director Peter Williams, who is really adult film director Philip O’Toole, because this movie is really a re-edited version of the 1987 film Cabaret Sin, a movie in which sex is outlawed except inside the Pleasure Dome, where it is performed live for those who can afford to attend. In other words, it’s Cafe Flesh.

Yet the film that has emerged from the VHS porn wasteland and become a Blade Runner post-apocalyptic movie that you didn’t have to walk through those adult saloon doors to rent. It takes place in Los Angeles, in 2020, and yes, the future is not now.

The world is policed by cops known as Eliminators who are battling the fascist Droid Warriors and their leader Azteca (Lorrie Lovett). Once, those Droids were simply servants and now, more and more, they are breaking free from their programming. The protagonist of this remix is Taylor (Greg Derek), who has a Droid of his own named Rochester (Kevin James, not the comedian) who sounds like a certain protocol droid and looks like a robot from Sleeper or a visitor from V. All Taylor cares about is his ex-wife Nicola (Krista Lane, billed here as Rebecca Lynn), who has been brought into the war and is being charged with stealing a digital decoder to help the Eliminators.

Yet all Taylor seems to do is sit at that club and watch people couple up, like Herschel Savage, Bunny Bleu (if you’re amazed that I knew who she was instantly, well, you didn’t grow up in the late 80s and early 90s), Candie Evans, Kristara Barrington, Keisha and Tom Byron, who is listed as dancer #3.

This is a movie that has a geisha having on-stage sex with a samurai warrior while a man has a ventriloquist doll on his shoulder like some demented bird as a Reformer android with glowing red eyes looks all menacing and fog is everywhere and neon and cigarette smoke and this is what I thought strip clubs would look like and have been forever let down that robots and synth didn’t dominate things, just women trying to make some money off as sad men drink and aggressive bros toss crumpled up dollar bills in furtive gestures of not understanding that they are not truly in control.

THX-1169 is such a better name for this movie.

There are the cheapest Blade Runner cars in this and I love them so much. I’m a fan of movies that in no way need to have science fiction in them, like Obsession: A Taste for Fear, and that makes me want more needless tech and so much fog in everything. When you think of 1988 in the adult world, everyone wanted to be the Dark Brothers or Stephen Sayadian and that wasn’t as easy as it seemed.

At the center of the end of the world movies, Naziploitation, smut without smut, Phillip K. Dick and when pornographers saw art within their industry and thought, “Anyone can make Night Dreams or New Wave Hookers” and totally made strange inferior junk like Party Doll-A-Go-Go (am I outing myself or what? I mean, at least that movie has Tianna, Raven and Madison Stone in it), not to mention Star Wars xerox cinema, off the rack futuristic costumes and fog, glorious rolling fog, you will find Droid.

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