Final Impact (1992)

Directed by Joseph Merhi — oh man, that dude is my new obsession — and writer Stephen Smoke (who also wrote Street Crimes, Living to Die and Magic Kid), Final Impact is the very definition of tickling you with a feather.

See that shirtless Lorenzo Lamas playing kickboxing champion Nick Taylor? Well, Nick is a drunken mess who never recovered from losing his title and his wife to Jake Gerard (Jeff Langton, who often did stunts in movies like Cobra and Road House).

Speaking of his wife Roxy, that’s Mimi Lesseos who I just want to watch do dropkicks and pro wrestling moves in real fight situations instead of just being insulted by a drunken Nick.

So the real story of the movie is Danny Davis (Michael Worth), a young kickboxer from Ohio that has aways idolized Nick, whose life — remember? — is horrible despite having Maggie (Kathleen Kinmont, Kelly Meeker herself!) loving him no matter how horribly he treats her.

A Vegas kickboxing championship is the goal for the whole movie, but then Nick gets the idea that he can still beat Jake, who beats him to the point that he dies in a hospital bed and yeah, you realize that you rented this for Lorenzo Lamas and now he’s dead and having Danny beat Jake is kind of anticlimatic especialy when you realize that he’s probably going to end up horizontally dancing with his hero’s common law widow, but direct to video films are wild and you just roll with the punches. Or kicks.

Also: the best karate fighters in the world are all white. Sure, whatever you say.

You can watch this on Tubi.

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