Ninja: The Violent Sorcerer (1982)

A remix of Du wang qian wang qun ying hui (The Stunning Gambling) which was directed by Chung Ching-Woon and changed beyond comprehension by the demonic entity known as Godfrey Ho, this movie is all about Stephen Baker, a gambling magician who uses the powers of the North and South Gambling Kings and dice taken from the mouths of dead people to become a Gambling King in his own right.

He then challenges the Gambling Master, Mr. Myer, to a card game with both of their lives as the bet. He cheats to win and even though there’s proof of his bad sportsmanship, Myer keeps his word and blows his brains out despite his son Leslie begging him to stay alive for their family.

Now, the ghost of his wife Rose appears to his brothers Roger, a white ninja, and Ken, a green ninja who is also a priest, to avenge his death. As they battle Chinese zombie vampires, Leslie and his father’s best friend seek out an alcoholic by the name of James Webber. He’s only lost once and that was enough to make him crawl into a bottle. At this point, the movie decides to pile on the characters, including a bar brawling girl named Ann, a stuntman named Ricky and a special effects girl called Lily and they combine fighting and gambling while the ninjas throw grenades.

I don’t know how anyone can dislike a movie that somehow combines the thrill of gambling with jiāngshī hopping into fisticuffs against multicolored ninjas. Seriously, how sad is your life if you look down on something so wonderful?

You can watch this on Tubi.

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