Dracula Sucks (1978)

Reggie Nalder played perhaps the best vampire of all time, Barlow in Tobe Hooper’s Salem’s Lot, but in this pornographic version of the Dracula story, he’s Van Helsing.

So who, in 1978, should play Dracula? C’mon. Jamie Gilils*.

Who else could be credited, somewhat, for gonzo, which destroyed the narrative nature of adult, but could also be in two of the best Golden Age movies, The Opening of Misty Beethoven and Barbara Broadcast?

Shot in the same Lancaster, California castle as Al Adamson’s Blood of Dracula’s Castle, this movie has an all-star cast for people who may blush when they mentioned their names, like Seka (her first role), John Leslie, Serena, John Holmes (I mean, he’s a household name, right?) Annette Haven and Kay Parker.

It’s way better than an adult Dracula should be, but you may wonder, “Why is this on the site? I know this is Not So Classic Monsters Week, but what gives?”

Well, item one: Norman Thaddeus Vane, who made The Black Room, was second unit director. And who was the director? Phillip Marshak. Yes, the man who made Cataclysm AKA The Nightmare Never Ends AKA The Case of Claire Hansen” in Night Train to Terror. And as you know, everything in my movie life revolves around that movie. I mean, everybody’s got something to do, everybody but you, you know?

There’s a softcore cut of this, which makes sense, but also Lust At First Bite, an even more hardcore cut with forty more minutes. You can get it all from Vinegar Syndrome and really, who else would put this out?

*Gillis also played Dracula in Dracula Exotico. Later, he’d be attacked by a werepanther played by Raven with Rocco Siffredi in tow in a movie co-star John Leslie directed, Curse of the Catwoman, and yes, that was totally not from research.

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