International Gorillay (1990)

Look, sometimes even I just don’t know. Back in 1990, Salman Rushdie was targeted for death and it was all people talked about and his bok The Satanic Verses was available everywhere and got way bigger than it would have been otherwise. I mean, my parents bought a copy.

Three brothers — a cop and two low level bad guys — lose their sister to the outbreak of violence in the protests over the book, so they decide to avenge her and Islam’s honor by hunting down and killing Rushdie. They’re the good guys.

Rushie is a Bond supervillain who wants to destroy so that he can build casinos, nightclubs and brothels around the world. He’s also hiding in the Philippines where the Israeli Army guards him but can’t stop God, as three Quaran appear in the sky and lighting strike him to Hell.

So what did Rushdie himself think of a movie where three goofballs dress as Batman to come and kill him? After it was banned in the UK, he asked for that to be overturned, saying “As a writer, I am opposed in principle to the use of the archaic criminal laws of blasphemy, sedition and criminal libel against creative works, even in the case of a film which quite plainly vilifies me.”

It’s also 2 hours and 48 minutes out of your life.

Luckily, the always dependable White Slaves of Chinatown have it on their YouTube page.

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