The Amityville Terror (2016)

The poster for this movie features Disneyland Paris’s Phantom Manor attraction with a few Photoshopped tweaks. No worries — it isn’t the house from the original film or even the one used in this movie.

However, the actual house used in The Amityville Terror is the same house used to shoot the interiors for Amityville: The Evil EscapesAnd Amanda Barton, who wrote and acted in this, was part of the wardrobe crew for a movie called Exorcism: The Possession of Gail Bowers. That movie used the house from the 2005 The Amityville Horror remake. Man — these films are becoming incestuous and I’m not just talking about the antics between Sonny and Patricia in Amityville II: The Possession.

What this movie is about is the house in Amityville that Jessica and Todd Jacobson, their daughter Hailey and troubled aunt Shae (Barton) have moved into. Right away, Shae starts acting strangely, probably because there was a kid who used to live in this house that burned his baby brother in a bathtub full of acid. Obviously, Amityville movies have upped the ante from the simple shotgun.

They set up that Hailey can use a crossbow, which is a good thing, because she fulfills the Chekov’s gun promise that this early reveal proposes.

Look, if you have a troubled marriage and family issues, I’ve found that moving to a haunted house is the worst thing possible. It doesn’t solve problems. It just creates more of them. And don’t sleep with anyone you meet inside that house that isn’t your wife — well, sometimes even if it is your wife.

Maybe don’t just watch Amityville movies. Then again, I’m doing an entire week of them, so allow me to take the pain for you, dear reader.

You can watch this on Amazon Prime, Tubi and Vudu.

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