Evil Toons (1992)

Fred Olen Ray has done a ton in his career. He was a still photographer on Shock Waves. He was a pro wrestler named Fabulous Freddie Valentine. He directed stuff like Hollywood Chainsaw HookersArmed Response and several movies with Eddie Deezen. And then he made this, a haunted house movie that combines animation, David Carradine and adult movie stars. Somehow, Becca watched this movie multiple times before she was through puberty.

Ray pitched this movie to Roger Corman and said he could do it for just $250,000. Corman said that the budget was too low and turned him down. Using equipment from another production and leftover film stock, Ray made this movie his own for just $140,000 dollars.

A group of teenage girls (played by scream queen Monique Gabrielle, Vivid Girl Barbara Dare who is billed as Stacey Nix, Suzanne Ager and adult star Madison Stone) have been hired to clean an old mansion, but soon a stranger delivers an old book. It’s the very same book we see in the beginning before David Carradine hangs himself (seriously, this happens) while wearing the wig that he kept from the miniseries North and South.

Soon, a cartoon monster escapes from the book and begins eating the girls and killing everyone in the house. By the end, only the good girl and the owner of the book — David Carradine again — destroy it with fire. As he leaves, everyone comes back to life and Arte Johnson comes over with a TV that plays cartoons.

Dick Miller shows up as the boss of the girls and his wife is Michelle Bauer, another former adult star who ended up in a ton of movies as a scream queen, including Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama.

Evil Toons is pretty ridiculous. But it gives you all that it promises: a haunted house, plenty of nude girls and lots of blood. I guess if that’s what you’re looking for, it delivers.

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