Those Canadians — they’ve made four Prom Night films, starting with, well, Prom Night, where Jamie Lee Curtis confronts disco dancing and a murder in the past. Then there’s the utterly insane Prom Night 2: Hello Mary Lou, where a former prom queen comes back to tempt and murder the children of her classmates. And then there’s Prom Night III: The Last Kiss, which is a comedy continuation of Mary Lou’s story. Finally, we have Prom Night IV: Deliver Us From Evil and it’s the craziest one of them all.

Hamilton High School. 1957. Lisa and Brad leave Lisa’s date behind to go heels to Jesus in Brad’s car, but are distracted by someone putting candles all over the hood. That’s when Lisa gets killed by a metal crucifix to the throat and Brad gets stabbed in the chest, his car set ablaze. That’s when we meet Father Jonas, who has been abused by multiple priests (keep in mind this was made in 1991) and now is showing signs of stigmata. Those priests now believe that he is possessed, so they jail him inside St. George Church.

33 years later, that’s where Father Colin is told by one of those priests that he won’t be going to Africa for missionary work. No, he’s going to stay right here and be Jonas’s new guardian, keeping him in a drug-induced coma. The problem is that Colin gets a mind of his own after Father Jaeger dies and he decides to stop drugging Jonas. Within hours, the evil priest kills the young man and makes his way to his old home. Cardinal Tourette is sent by the church to clean up matters, staging Colin’s murder as a suicide and hunting down Jonas.

Meanwhile, the old St. Basil Seminary is now Mark’s (J. H. Wyman, who would go on to create TV’s Fringe and Almost Human) family’s summer home, where he’s taking his girlfriend Meagan (Nicole de Boer, Cube), Laura (Joy Tanner, who is the voice of Candy Kong from Donkey Kong Country) and Jeff (Alle Ghadban, who would go on to be part of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition) to celebrate their graduation and skip prom. 

There are some issues — Meagan was in love with the now deceased Father Colin. She’s also a virgin who is finally going to give up her modesty to Mark. And everyone wants to have sex with her, even Laura (yes, this is a scummy exploitation film, so these things happen). Also, all the of the electronics and applicances in the house have been stolen and Jonas is already living inside the house, claiming Mark’s younger brother Jonathan as his first victim.

Somehow — don’t ask me how — Jonas starts making obscene phone calls when he’s not killing off people. Just to show what a maniac he is, he walks around with Laura’s scalp after offing her and then crushes Jeff’s head with just his bare hands. Then he crucifies the young lovers’ bodies and sets them on fire because, well, why not?

Jonas then kills Mark and chases Meagan all over the grounds, only being stopped by bug spray (yes, I was amazed by this as you are reading it) and even uses his priest powers to interrupt phone calls to the police. Magical priest powers! She finds Mark’s gun and shoots the priest dead, only to have him come back and try and kill her as she prays for forgiveness. The dude has the Holy Water scepter from church, but it shoots out flames instead of water, which is perhaps the most awesome thing I’ve ever seen in a movie. Megan isn’t so impressed, as she beats him to death again with a shovel, then runs outside and blows a shed up real good.

The next morning, Meagan is placed in an ambulance while Jonas’ body is placed in another surrounded by the Cardinals of the church. He opens his eyes at the same time she does, tickling me with the feather of a promise that there would be a sequel to this.

If it doesn’t come through, I loved this movie. It’s total slasher ridiculousness a decade after everyone decided to stop making them. I love that when the kids drink to skipping the prom, they say, “Cheers Jamie Lee Curtis!” And with his role as Father Colin, Brock Simpson has been in every single Prom Night.

Killer abused priests with stigmata that can make prank phone calls with their mind and set up candles on cars before they kill. You can’t get that anywhere else, you know?

You can check this one out on Amazon Prime.