THE FILMS OF COFFIN JOE: The Bloody Exorcism of Coffin Joe (1974)

After finishing his latest movie, Jose Mojica Marins gives an interview. He’s asked, “Does Coffin Joe exist?” Surely the answer is no. But then a camera light explodes and we wonder, Well, perhaps…”

Mains stays with a friend to write his next movie, The Demon Exorcist.

Everything seems normal at Alvaro’s house. His father Mr. Julio is a nice old man planting flowers, Alvaro’s wife Lucia seems kind and his daughters Betinha, Luciana, and Vilma all seem quite normal. But at night, Mr. Julio tears off his shirt and screams that he has come to collect a debt. The Christmas tree is filled with snakes and spiders. And a mysterious woman keeps intruding into everyone’s thoughts. She just stands there, holding a cat, posed in front of a photo of Coffin Joe.

That’s when the secrets all come out. Lucia shares that Vilma is the daughter of a witch and has been promised to her other child Eugenio, whose father is Satan. Vilma wants to marry Carlo and this enrages the witch, who gave her the child to cover up Alvaro’s lack of being able to impregnate her.

Roosters get their heads bitten clean off, the fiancee nearly dies in car crashes and a naked Vilma knocks out Marins, who awakens to a Black Mass presided over by Coffin Joe, who exhorts “May the blood of those who don’t deserve to live burst out of their bodies! May lightning burn the scum!” Then Coffin Joe walks up a living staircase of naked women who jubilantly dance after he steps across their backs, joining Vilma and Eugenio in unholy matrimony as scenes of cannibalism, torture and dismemberment fill the screen. Up next, young Betinha is to be killed, but Marins finds a crucifix and screams, “I believe in God!”

The witch and her son die as Coffin Joe is exorcised from Marins. All is well, as everyone gathers for the Christmas feast. All except for Betinha. The camera zooms into her eye and there is Coffin Joe, laughing and as always, superior.

A Christmas movie, an Exorcist rip-off, a Coffin Joe sequel all in one movie. How magical is that?

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