I kind of love that this movie answers all of my meta needs, from reuniting Dolly Parton with Dabney Coleman and Lily Tomlin to having Buddy Ebsen show up as Barnaby Jones. And I realize that every critic wanted more out of director Penelope Spheeris. But look, I’m a simple man and I like seeing Jim Varney play Uncle Jed and do you have any clue how many hours and hours I’ve watched of the original show?

So yeah, Erika Eleniak is no Donan Douglas, Diedrich Bader can never touch Max Baer Jr. and while I love Cloris Leachman, she’s not anywhere close to Irene Ryan. But isn’t it cool to get one more episode, in fact, multiple episodes? And yeah, Rob Schenider and Lea Thompson are just alright bad guys, but this is a movie silly enough to have Zsa Zsa Gabor show up as herself and not smart enough for Jed to say, “That’s that Oliver Douglas feller’s sister’s wife.”

Seriously, grade school Sam watched Leave It to Beaver, Please Don’t Eat the Daisies, The Ghost and Mrs. Muir and The Beverly Hillbillies every single day for hours. If anybody wants to reboot any of those shows, please reach out to me. I’m ready to share my wasted life with the world.