Adam Chaplin (2011)

Directed, written, scored and starring Emanuele De Santi — I imagine he also made sandwiches for everyone — this movie is billed as the most bloody movie ever and lives up to that in buckets and buckets of non-stop plasma.

Heaven’s Valley is controlled by a mob boss named Denny Richards, who has killed our hero Adam’s wife. So Adam does what any of us would do in a place where the cops are the criminals and he has no power. He gives himself over to a demon and starts punching gigantic bloody holes inside people that spray gore all over the camera.

There’s a sequel — here’s a page about it — from Hotel Inferno (and uncredited co-director and co-writer) Giulio De Santi and Hotel Inferno 2: The Cathedral of Pain director Tiziana Machella in production.

Basically, imagine if The Crow had a few drinks with Riki-Oh and they decided that a movie that’s a non-stop fight scene punctuated with upside down crosses was a good idea. Well, let me tell you, it’s a great idea. Sure, there’s no story, but when has that ever stopped us before?

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