5 Dead on the Crimson Canvas (1996)

Man, a Super-8 looking movie made in 1996 that’s supposed to look like a scuzzy 1971 Italian film? Yes, that’s pretty much exactly the kind of movie that I’m looking for. And sure, the music is over the dialogue and nothing really makes sense, but if I worried about films making sense, I would have stopped this site long ago.

I mean, a beatnik poet spells out the title of the film and all of the dialogue is way off from the peope speaking it and there are big stretches where nothing happens, but hey — it’s basically an American crew trying to make something that hasn’t been made for a quarter of a century.

I don’t know how good the rest of writer/director Joseph F. Parda’s films are but with titles like Evil Streets and Machines of Love and Hate, they are wonderous if only in my imagination.

So yeah — it’s about an artist obsessed with death getting killed, his body disappearing and his brother searching for it through a sexually twisted underground. You know — what we call Tuesday around here.

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