Never doubt my commitment to Crown International Pictures or Mill Creek Entertainment. As I prepared to watch this movie, I learned that my B-Movie Blast set actually had the disks for the Dark Crimes set. A quick Amazon order was made, but I wouldn’t be getting a delivery in time to write this for the site. And Weekend Pass, in a world where everything is streaming, was not streaming, even on Mill Creek’s great movieSPREE app.
There’s one place on the internet that movies go and hide. That would be OK.ru, the Russian lawless land of video, where you can often find the movie you want — it was the only place I could find Armed and Dangerous — but you have to hear someone screaming the dialogue in Russian over the real audio track of the movie.
Lawrence Bassoff made two movies: this one and Hunk. Both are on the B-Movie Blast set — as well as Mill Creek’s Too Cool for School collection. Yes, I am that guy buying multiple Mill Creek 12, 20, 50 and even 100 movie sets just because I love them that much.
Basically, four Navy recruits get out and about on shore leave after finishing their initial training. This is what we call a hijinks ensue movie. Just re-read that first sentence and add “hijinks ensure” and you’ve got the entire movie figured out.
Have I seen too many teen sex comedies to instantly recognize Chip McAllister as Magneto Jones from Hamburger: The Motion Picture? That D.W. Brown was in Mischief? That Hilary Shepherd was also in Scanner Cop, Theodore Rex and, yes, Bassoff’s other film Hunk?
Look, some people use their minds to make the world a better place by inventing great things or leading others in peace and harmony. I just sit here in my pajamas watching teen movies from when I was a teen and write them up for you to read. I’d argue I’m doing the Lord’s work.
PS: Phil Hartman is in this, which makes how boring the rest of the film is a necessary exercise and maddening, because he should have just been the whole movie.