Misbegotten (1997)

Instead of Rebecca De Mornay-style psycho mother coming after kids that aren’t hers, 1997’s Misbegotten has Billy Crapshoot (Kevin Dillon), who is obsessed with fathering kids. The only problem is that he usually ends up choking the life out of even the nicest women. He’s not good with relationships, as they say.

He gets a good plan by donating sperm and then tracking down the parents, terrorizing them until he gets what he wants. He ends up messing with Nick Mancuso (Stingray, the Under Siege movies) and Lysette Anthony (Lyssa from Krull!), starting off tender and then getting more and more insane.

Based on the novel Misbegotten by James Gabriel Berman, this was written by Larry Cohen, uniting him with director Mark Lester, a titanic drive-in/direct-to-video team if I’ve ever seen one.

Should you see this? Kevin Dillon’s character is named Conan Cornelius — he steals the name by killing Stefan Arngrim, yes Barry Lockridge from Land of the Giants and Drugstore from Lester’s Class — and he gets shot multiple times right in his buttonhole maker. You know, his tally-whacker. His 100% All-Beef Thermometer. You know what I mean and I think you do.

The cover art has a baby with lightning coming out of his eyes. The actual movie is Johnny Drama turned up to 11 in a Lifetime movie with no real moral center. So my answer is yes. See this.

You can watch this on YouTube.

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