Each October, the Unsung Horrors podcast does a month of themed movies. This year, they will once again be setting up a fundraiser to benefit Best Friends, which works to save the lives of cats and dogs across America, giving pets second chances and providing them with happy homes.

Today’s theme: Haunted House

A remake of William Castle’s 13 Ghosts, I have a soft spot in my heart for this movie, despite it being a big-budget horror movie made in the last twenty years. It all starts with ghost hunter Cyrus Kriticos (F. Murray Abraham) and his assistant Dennis Rafkin (Matthew Lillard) trying to capture a ghost in a junkyard. Nearly everyone is killed, but the ghost is taken. 

Cyrus’ nephew Arthur (Tony Shalhoub) is told he has inherited his uncle’s mansion, so he moves there with his kids, Kathy (Shannon Elizabeth) and Bobby (Alec Roberts), and their nanny, Maggie (Rah Digga). As lawyer Ben Moss (JR Bourne) explains the home, Dennis has snuck in as a repairman. The family explores the house, which is filled with transparent walls inscribed with Latin spells. As Moss tries to steal some money, he breaks a wall and is soon killed; one of the ghosts is released, and all of them represent something Arthur sought to harness: the Black Zodiac.

At the same time, Kalina Oretzia (Embeth Davidtz) has snuck in to free the ghosts, one of whom, the Withered Lover, is Arthur’s late wife Jean (Kathryn Anderson). The house is a machine powered by the captive ghosts, allowing the owner to see the past, present, and future. However, a thirteenth ghost — which comes from a sacrifice motivated by pure love — can shut the house down. Arthur believes that he must become that ghost to save his children.

The truth is, the thirteenth ghost will actually activate the machine and Cyrus is alive. He and Kalina are lovers and plan to use his home and the Ocularis Infernum to become incredibly rich. The Black Zodiac that powers the machine are:

• The First Born Son, a boy named Billy Michaels (Mikhael Speidel), who loves cowboys and Indians. He was killed by an arrow shot at his head by another young boy.

• The Torso is a gambler named Jimmy Gambino (Daniel Wesley). He was killed by gangsters, wrapped in plastic and dumped in the ocean.

• The Bound Woman is Susan LeGrow (Laura Mennell), a cheerleader who cheated on her quarterback boyfriend on prom night and was strangled.

• The Withered Lover, as mentioned above, is Arthur’s wife Jean, who died in a house fire.

• The Torn Prince is Royce Clayton (Craig Olejnik), a baseball player who died in a drag race.

• The Angry Princess, Dana Newman (Shawna Loyer), constantly tried to improve her looks through plastic surgery. She tried to operate on her own face and then committed suicide. She’s the ghost that emerges and kills Moss.

• The Pilgrimess is Isabella Smith (Xantha Radley), a victim of the Salem witch trials who was starved to death.

• Harold and Margaret Shelburne (C. Ernst Harth and Laurie Soper) are the Great Child and the Dire Mother. Margaret was a circus dwarf who was assaulted by the tall man in the freak show; Harold was the result. After she was killed, he murdered most of the sideshow.

• The Hammer is George Markley (Herbert Duncanson), a black blacksmith whose family was killed when he was accused of stealing from a white man. He took his hammer and killed the men who killed them, before he was caught and killed by having railroad spikes hammered into his body.

• The Jackal is Ryan Kuhn (Shayne Wyler), a sex predator who died in a sanitarium fire.

• The Juggernaut is Horace Mahoney (John DeSantis), a serial killer who is the most dangerous of all the ghosts.

Arthur was supposed to become the 13th ghost, The Broken Heart, and activate the machine designed by the devil and powered by the dead. Is there even a final ghost? Hmm…maybe you should watch the movie.

There’s an exciting plan to create a TV series that will delve deeper into the stories of all the ghosts. As a fan, I can’t wait for this to happen.

Directed by Steve Beck (Ghost Ship) and written by Neal Marshall Stevens and Richard D’Ovidio, this movie deserved a better reception than it initially received. If only we knew how much worse horror movies would get, we might have appreciated this more.