Wealthy drug dealer Miles Montego (Ja Rule) starts dating out of his type when he meets Vanessa Leon (Adrienne Bailon, who I know dated Rob Kardashian), a lovely Christian woman (“A cross upon her bedroom wall / From grace she will fall / An image burning in her mind / And between her thighs”) at a friend’s house. Miles claims he wants to change his life and find God, but he’s still moving weight, and the DEA is on to him.

The Wikipedia for this movie is great, because it summarizes the film in a few sentences, which allows you to see precisely how much happens so quickly: “Miles’ mother dies from an illness, and he proposes to Vanessa on an airplane. After a car accident, Vanessa enters a coma. As he waits in the hospital, Miles starts to restore his faith in God, praying to him to make Vanessa wake up and saying that she shouldn’t have to pay for his sins. Vanessa recovers, and the two marry.”

Not only does Miles marry a church girl, but he soon becomes a pastor. While all of his friends are in jail — he sends Bibles — for his crimes, he gets away with it. Writer and producer Galley Molina made this about his own life, and unlike Miles, he did pay for his crimes with a jail sentence. I mean, so did Ja, serving 28 months for tax evasion. People can change.

Ja does get to drop this monologue (thanks to Complex for transcribing) in which he yells at God in a church, no less: “Good, I’m glad you’re here, because we’ve got some serious issues to talk about. First of all, you took my mother from me, and that just about killed me, but I kept my mouth shut and let that one slide. I’ve done some bad things to people for a lot less, but I’ve been trying to give you the benefit of the doubt. But I’ve been faithful. I’ve been going to church and reading your precious little book. I even drop stacks of hundreds into that little velvet bag they pass around every Sunday! I’ve changed. I’m a changed man—can’t you see that? Oh, my bad. Of course you can. You see everything, right?

So what’s the problem then? What do you want from me? I know I haven’t made you proud. How can I with all this mess I’ve got goin’ on? What happened? What happened to all those things I’ve been reading about: grace, forgiveness, mercy? Where was the mercy for my mother? And now you want to take Vanessa away from me? Nah, that ain’t happening, big guy.

Look, I’m a stand-up guy, man. If anybody needs to pay for their sins, then let it be me—please, leave everybody else out of it. Just take me! I’m ready for whatever you’ve got coming. You want to send me to Hell? Book the flight! But please… Please, I’m begging you. Don’t take Vanessa from me. Just tell me, whatever you want me to do. Tell me what you want me to do to spare her life. I didn’t mean a word I just said. I’m sorry for yelling at you in your house.”

As for me, I love the cast they got: Stephen Baldwin, Martin Kove, Michael Madsen and Jerry Rice? That’s how you do it!

You can watch this on Tubi.