I have to tell you, I drove my wife nuts by saying the name of this movie over and over again.

This starts with Monica (J. Roppolo Jacobs) trying to call her daughter Verity (Evelyn Giovine) — or V as everyone seems to call her — from a pay phone after she causes an incident at a mega church by calling Pastor Dean Humphries (Damon Dayoub) a “hypocritical bastard.” She barely gets a message sent before she’s cut off, just as her daughter is in the midst of shaking down someone along with her boyfriend Sam (Greg Finley). As the man runs, Sam takes a shot at him and steals a car while a convenience store owner gets a clear view of both of their faces. V breaks up with him, something that seems to be a long time coming, and heads to The Devil’s Dive, a bar where her foster sister Ruby (Raquel Davies) works.

After doing some research into where her mother was — yes, there are still payphones, as her sister reminds her — she is contacted by Detective Peter Frederick (Daniel Link). They’ve found her mother’s body and she has to identify her. We soon discover that Peter might be V’s father and he definitely wants to discuss her relationship with Sam, the money they owe to drug dealer Ricky and the beating of the man the other night. She runs and decides that there’s no way the police can handle this investigation, so she has to infiltrate the church where her mother died.

To do that, she has to become The Sintern.

After meeting the Pastor and his wife Heidi (Stefanie Estes), V renames herself Chastity and becomes part of the marketing team for the church. Despite being on the bad side of longtime parishioner Louann (Judy Kain), she wins over everyone, including the social media officer Kayle (Phuong Kubacki) — the brownies help — and singer Gage (Samuel Larsen), who leads the church’s choir in worship. V — or Chastity, as she’s now called — now understands the sin of illicit thoughts every time she sees Gage make an altar call.

Of course Chastity is able to figure out exactly who killed her mother, get the boy to fall in love with her and get away from her criminally minded ex-boyfriend. She also gets to bond with her foster sister all over again, who conveniently is going to college for marketing. As I was watching this while doing my day job in advertising, I just kept yelling at the TV (when I wasn’t making up songs about The Sintern).

Directed by Julie Herlocker (who was a producer on Millennium and Grimm) and written by Jeff Dickamore and Aurora Florence, this presents a level-headed look at a church — despite the murder and sexual mania of its leaders, the followers are there for good reasons — and has a heroine who moves past her upbringing to become a capable heroine willing to do nearly anything to expose the truth. Also, as I love exploitation, bonus points for — spoiler warning — Pastor father nearly assaulting her, followed by her puking up her guts when she realized that any daddy issues that she had in the past are about to be multiplied beyond belief. Double word score — or whatever — for the fact that Pastor Peter doesn’t really know much of the Bible and seems to make things up, which others call out and which confuses our heroine, who doesn’t know much of the Psalms.

On a final note, I always get weirded out when religious people drop the name and location of their Bible quote. Like, you’d say, “You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness.” And then follow it with Psalm 30:11. You don’t see me closing my movie quotes with where they appeared, like “You wanted to kill me! What are you gonna do now, huh? Now death is coming for you! You wanted to kill Helena Markos! Hell is behind that door! You’re going to meet death now… the LIVING DEAD!” Suspiria, an hour and five minutes in.

I should totally start doing that.

You can watch this on Tubi.