2022 Scarecrow Psychotronic Challenge Day 13: Sunset Boulevard (1950)

13. RELIVOMAX: Do your enigmas need resolving? Don’t wait, talk to an expert to see if Relivomax is right for you. Taking Relivomax may result in flashbacks.

At a mansion on Sunset Boulevard, police officers and gossip photographers find Joe Gillis (William Holden) drowned face down in the swimming pool of Norma Desmond (Gloria Swanson). Joe is kind enough to start telling us how he got here. How he died, too.

It was just a few months ago that Joe couldn’t sell anything. He was dodging repossession men when he ran into the mansion of Desmond, who was once something. Somebody. She learns he can write and has him work on her script about Salome. You know, the one who wanted men so much she cut their heads off.

Norma is in her own plane of reality, one where she’s in love with Joe. The person who really loves her is Max von Mayerling (one of the greatest directors of all time, Erich von Stroheim), the butler who writes all of her fan mail. He even convinces Joe that she’s about to kill herself to finally get him into her bed.

She’ll only talk to Cecil B. Demille (playing Cecil B. Demille) all while undergoing beauty treatments to prepare for her comeback. At the same time Joe is working with Betty (Nancy Olson), a script reader, as he makes his own story. Max knows this and reveals that at one time, he was a director who discovered Norma, guided her to becoming famous and was destroyed by her after their marriage and divorce. Now, he’s her slave.

Norma tries to destroy Joe and Betty’s working relationship, but he’s had enough. He plans on going back to Ohio and forgetting Hollywood and tells her to stop the threats of killing herself. Instead, she shoots him and he falls into the pool where we first began.

As for Norma, Max and the police are directing her as her arrest has become her break with reality and she is finally back in the news. Except in her mind, this is the red carpet.

When director Billy Wilder was growing up in Germany, he dreamed of Hollywood. When he finally got there, all the mansions remained, all with shut-in stars that would never act again. Wilder wondered that now that the world had forgotten them how they lived.

Norma is a mix of so many actresses of that time. Mary Pickford, Pola Negri, Mae Murray, Valeska Surratt, Audrey Munson, Clara Bow and Norma Talmadge. All actresses who were at the top of stardom and then were alone in their huge homes, never to be thought of other than by a few fans who held them in their hearts and stayed awake late to watch them on TV.

Writer Charles Brackett said that the plan was always to have Swanson as Norma. Wilder wanted Mae West, who was offended. She would never be forgotten. She would always be a sex symbol until the day she faded out of our plane of existence.

What is Sunset Boulevard? A dark comedy? A film not? Something unlike nearly every other movie made before or since? It’s astounding that so many people — Buster Keaton, Hedda Hopper, Anna Q. Nilsson — play unflattering versions of themselves. It’s almost the first time Hollywood would recall itself and not in a camp or fun meta way. Everyone knew from the scandal papers — since the 20s — how dangerous and decadent Los Angeles was. But even after that fame fades, it can still kill.

UNSUNG HORRORS HORROR GIVES BACK 2023: The Hyena of London (1964)

Each October, the Unsung Horrors podcast does a month of themed movies. This year they will once again be setting up a fundraiser to benefit Best Friends, which is working to save the lives of cats and dogs all across America, giving pets second chances and happy homes.

Today’s theme: 1960s

Director and writer Gino Mangini claimed that he wrote hundreds of movies, but IMDB lists 21. There’s a lot of peplum on that list, as well as a very late in the day mondo, Mondo cane 2000 – L’incredibile, which was made in 1988 and directed by Gabriele Crisanti, the producer of Giallo In VeniceBurial Ground and Patrick Still Lives, three of the grimiest movies ever allowed to escape the camera. Oh yeah, he also produced Gesichter des Todes V. That’s right. The bootleg German Faces of Death 5.

1883 London: Martin “The Hyena” Bauer has been strangling people for three years before Scotland Yard finally brings him to the gallows. Except that his body disappears from the morgue and the killings start all over again.

Dr. Edward Dalton (Giotto Tempestini) believes that the killer is back from the grave, but he’s also dealing with his daughter Muriel (Patrizia Del Frae) dating a man not right for her named Henry Quinn (Luciano Stella who you know better as Tony Kendall). No problem, because Dalton’s assistant Dr. Anthony Finney (Angelo Dessy) frames Henry for the killings. But ahh…what if Dalton had been putting pieces of Bauer’s brain into his own and transferred the need to kill to himself?

I thought this was going to be an early giallo and it’s quite nearly a soap opera. But hey — the ending! What kind of bullshit science is that? Oh, Italian exploitation bullshit science.

The Francesco De Masi score for this movie was taken from Riccardo Freda’s The Ghost and would return again for Joe D’Amato’s Beyond the Darkness. And hey! There’s Luciano Pigozzi in the cast!

Tales from the Crypt S1 E2: And All Through the House (1989)

It’s hard for me to be objective about this episode as this story — which originally appeared in Vault of Horror #35 — is also my favorite part of Amicus’ Tales from the Crypt movie. No matter how good this is, I mean, I wrote a song once called “What Are Those Purple Bruises On the Throat of Joan Collins”?

“Ho, ho, ho, kiddies! Just your old pal the Crypt Keeper having a little holiday fun. Why else would I be in this getup…unless there was a Claus in my contract? In fact, I’ve got some Christmas goose for you…goose bumps, that is. Yes, indeedy. A little terror tale, chock-full of holiday fear…I mean cheer, of course. So get a gander of a Yuletide yelp-yarn that goes a little something like this ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house.”

Elizabeth Cayman — not named Joanne Clayton from the original movie version, while the comic story’s protagonist is unnamed — is played by Mary Ellen Trainor, the mom from The Goonies and the kidnapped woman who sets Romancing the Stone in action) has just killed her husband (Marshall Bell) and is keeping it from her daughter (Lindsey Whitney Barry). What she doesn’t know is that a killer (Larry Drake) has escaped the mental home and is considered extremely dangerous. She’s pretty rough herself, much more capable than the other two versions of the character even if they share the same fate.

Directed by Robert Zemeckis and written by Fred Dekker and Steven Dodd, this episode is actually closer to the comic — Elizabeth is blonde — than Amicus was. There’s even a reference to EC publisher Willam Gaines — it takes place in Gaines County — and the cop’s name is Feldstein, which is for Al Feldstein, the reason for so many EC Comics stories.

Perhaps the best part of this episode is the Crypt Keeper dressed as Santa, which is something that has gotten me through so many holidays.

If you’re wondering why it looks so good, just look to who did the cinematography. Dean Cundey.

CHILLER THEATER MONTH: The Undead (1957)

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Undead was first on Chiller Theater on Saturday, October 10, 1964 at 1 a.m. It also aired on February 3, 1968; October 14, 1973; March 30, 1974; May 10, 1975; May 28, 1977 and October 23, 1982.

In the mid-1950s, reincarnation was in and The Search for Bridey Murphy was being made, so Roger Corman asked Charles Griffith to write a script, which was originally called The Trance of Diana Love, which is a great title, and was to be in all iambic pentameter.

Griffith said, “I separated all the different things with sequences with the devil, which were really elaborate, and the dialogue in the past was all in iambic pentameter. Roger got very excited by that. He handed the script around for everybody to read, but nobody understood the dialogue, so he told me to translate it into English. The script was ruined.”

I can’t even add up how many wasted hours that was.

Mel Welles, who played Smolkin, told Interviews with B Science Fiction and Horror Movie Makers: Writers, Producers, Directors, Actors, Moguls and Makeup, “It was a wonderful script and it probably would have been the cult film rather than Little Shop of Horrors had it been shot that way. But either Roger or someone at American-International Pictures didn’t think it was commercially viable to do it that way and at the last minute a decision was made to rewrite the script without that.”

Quintus Ratcliff (Val DuFour) is a psychic researcher who has spent years in Tibet to learn how to mentally regress someone back into their past life. He wants to prove to an old professor that he can do this, so he hires Diana Love (Pamela Duncan) for $500 to place her into a trance for two days.

She’s soon back in the Middle Ages, trapped in the mind of her ancestor Helene, accused of witchcraft. Diana is able to inform her past self of how to escape, so she heads into the night and meets up with the real witch Livia (Allison Hayes) and even Satan himself (Richard Devon).

Using the link between Diana and Helene, Quintus comes back in time, hoping to convince Helene to avoid her death and change history.

With Billy Barty as an imp and Dick Miller as a leper, this Corman film may have been a cheap one — and one that caused him stress with the bad smelling fog and budget issues — but it’s a fun idea well told. You can’t even tell that it was shot inside a supermarket.

This movie is where The Misfits got the artwork for their album Evilive. You can learn more about the horror film influences of The Misfits here.

You can watch this on Tubi.

WRITE FOR MILL CREEK MONTH!

November is the annual Mill Creek Month and this year I’ve picked two different sets. I’d love to have you write for the site and here are the movies that you can choose from.

Sci-Fi Classics: Choose from fifty science fiction movies, which you can find on this Letterboxd or IMDB list. You can get the set from Amazon. There are some used ones for $3.49!

  • The Alpha Incident
  • The Amazing Transparent Man
  • Assignment: Outer Space
  • The Astral Factor
  • The Atomic Brain
  • Attack of the Monsters
  • Battle of the Worlds
  • Blood Tide
  • The Brain Machine
  • Bride of the Gorilla
  • Colossus and the Amazon Queen
  • Cosmos: War of the Planets
  • Crash of the Moons
  • Destroy All Planets
  • Eegah
  • First Spaceship on Venus
  • The Galaxy Invader
  • Gamera the Invincible
  • Gamera vs. Guiron
  • Gamera vs. Viras
  • Giants of Rome
  • Hercules Against the Moon Men
  • Hercules and the Captive Women
  • Hercules and the Tyrants of Babylon
  • Hercules Unchained
  • Horrors of Spider Island
  • The Incredible Petrified World
  • Killers From Space
  • Kong Island
  • Laser Mission
  • The Lost Jungle
  • Menace from Outer Space
  • Mesa of Lost Women
  • Monstrosity
  • Moon of the Wolf
  • Phantom From Space
  • The Phantom Planet
  • Planet Outlaws
  • Prehistoric Women
  • Queen of the Amazons
  • Robot Monster
  • She Gods of Shark Reef
  • The Snow Creature
  • Snowbeast
  • Son of Hercules: The Land of Darkness
  • Teenagers From Outer Space
  • They Came From Beyond Space
  • Unknown World
  • Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women
  • Voyage to the Prehistoric Planet
  • Warning From Space
  • The Wasp Woman
  • White Pongo
  • The Wild Women of Wongo
  • Zonar: The Thing from Venus

The Swingin’ Seventies: Choose from fifty movies from the 1970s, which you can find on this Letterboxd or IMDB list. You can get the set from Amazon. There are some used ones for $3.47!

Movies include:

  • Against a Crooked Sky
  • The Border
  • The Borrowers
  • C.C. and Company
  • Cold Sweat
  • Concrete Cowboys
  • Congratulations, It’s a Boy!
  • The Cop in Blue Jeans 
  • Hannah, Queen of the Vampires
  • David Copperfield
  • The Death of Richie
  • The Deadly Trap
  • Identikit
  • Evel Knievel
  • Fair Play
  • Firehouse
  • The Four Deuces
  • Get Christie Love! 
  • Good Against Evil
  • The Gun and the Pulpit
  • The Hanged Man
  • How Awful About Allan
  • James Dean
  • Jane Eyre
  • Jory
  • Katherine
  • The Klansman
  • Las Vegas Lady
  • F. Scott Fitzgerald and the Last of the Belles
  • Maybe I’ll Come Home in the Spring
  • Rulers of the City
  • Mr. Sycamore
  • The New Adventures of Heidi
  • The Proud and Damned
  • A Real American Hero
  • The River Niger
  • Rogue Male
  • Stunts
  • The Swiss Conspiracy
  • The Squeeze
  • They Call It Murder
  • To All My Friends On Shore
  • The Treasure of Jamaica Reef
  • Wacky Taxi
  • The Baby Sitter
  • The War of the Robots
  • Warhead
  • The Werewolf of Washington
  • The Young Graduates

AND!

On Thanksgiving, the site will celebrate like it’s the 70s and we;’e watching WOR. Giant monsters all day, so send in your favorite.

TUBI ORIGINAL: Sinister Assistant (2023)

Gigi (Lucy Barrett) never knew her mother or father, raising herself with the help of her roommate and longtime best friend Rachel (Phoenix Best). She makes most of her money running scams, like stealing video games and selling them to kids whose parents don’t allow them to get them.

This all changes when she figures out that her mother might be Linda (Tiffany Kyle), the owner of Fusefire, the biggest video game company in the world. But to get closer to her mother, she has to lie and scheme and get close to her assistant Blair (Jillian Kinsey) and deal with the sexual threats of her stepbrother Vincent (Brandon Mitchell).

Directed by Tamar Halpern (Her Affair to Die For), this movie is not The Assistant, which is also a Tubi original. It does have Gigi going all out to get revenge, as well as discussion of video games that feels like your grandmother wrote it: “The touch screen controls are now more intuitive.” as well as “No one watches the cut scenes.” Someone spent five minutes on Reddit for that line.

You can watch this on Tubi.

CHILLER THEATER MONTH: Attack of the Puppet People (1958)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Attack of the Puppet People was first on Chiller Theater on Saturday, September 26, 1964 at 11:15 p.m. It also aired on July 31, 1965 and February 18, 1967.

With the totally awesome working titles The Fantastic Puppet People and I Was a Teenage Doll, as well as the provocative UK title Six Inches Tall, this Bert I. Gordon auteur project — he wrote, directed and produced — was rushed into theaters by AIP to capitalize on the success of the previous year’s The Incredible Shrinking Man. It was paired with War of the Colossal Beast, which is ironic, as this film features that movie’s first installment, The Amazing Colossal Man.

Mr. Franz (John Hoyt, who was in everything from Cleopatra to Flesh Gordon) owns a doll factory and seems quite nice, but the lifelike dolls stored in glass canisters — his special collection — seem quite odd. That’s because they’re all real people transformed into dolls!

June Kennedy (Teenage DollSorority Girl and the incredibly named The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent) plays Sally Reynolds, who takes a job with Mr. Franz. Before long, she’s gotten all into salesman Bob Westley(John Agar, who has a vast career from John Wayne films to tons of B movies and science fiction films all the way to Miracle Mile; he was also the first husband of Shirley Temple), which seems to upset her boss. Before long, the guy is gone — just when they were about to get engaged and move away!

Soon, the twosome finds themselves part of Franz’s doll collection, forced to act out Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Keep an eye out for Laurie Mitchell (who played Queen Yllana, the ruler of Venus, in Queen of Outer Space) and Susan Gordon, the daughter of the director. She’s also in his films Tormented and Picture Mommy Dead.

This movie is part of American history, believe it or not. On the evening of June 17, 1972, Alfred C. Baldwin III (in a nearby hotel as a lookout for the Watergate burglars) became so interested in the film that he didn’t notice the two plainclothes detectives who made the historic arrests that led to the event known as Watergate.

You can watch this with Rifftrax commentary on Tubi. You can also get the Shout! Factory blu ray release with a 2K scan if you’d like.

THE IMPORTANT CINEMA CLUB’S SUPER SCARY MOVIE CHALLENGE DAY 12: Incubus (1966)

October 12: A Horror Film in which William Shatner appears.

Created by ophthalmologist L. L. Zamenhof in 1887, Esperanto is supposed to be a universal second language for international communication. In English, the name means one who hopes and it’s the largest constructed international auxiliary language with a few thousand speakers.

Zamenhof had some big dreams that go past making an easy and flexible language. He thought that this new way of speaking would lead to world peace.

Incubus is the second film to be made in the language, following Angoroj. This was directed and written by The Outer Limits creator Leslie Stevens, who used the cancellation of that show to make an art house movie with that show’s cinematographer Conrad L. Hall and composer Dominic Frontiere.

This is the story of a spring in Nomen Tuum that heals the sick and makes ugly people ravishing and oh yes, there are many succubus and incubus there to lure humans to Hell.

Kia (Allyson Ames) wants a pure man to be her perfect target, but her sister Amael (Eloise Hardt) tries to tell her that if she falls in love, she will lose so much. Then she goes after Marc (Shatner), a soldier here to heal his wounds of battle. He’s with his sister Arndis (Ann Atmar) who is so dumb that she loses her sight by staring at the sun.

This gets wild, as Marc’s purity defiles the demons, who call upon an incubus (Milos Milos, whose life is insane; he was the bodyguard for Alain Delon and a friend of Stevan Marković, who died owning sexually explicit photos of Claude Pompidou, wife of French President Georges Pompidou, causing a big scandal and an unsolved crime; Milos went to America where he married Cynthia Bouron, who had a paternity case against Cary Grant, and was beaten to death and found in the trunk of her car outside a grocery store. As for Milos Milos, he was dating Barbara Ann Thomason, the wife of Mickey Rooney, at the same time he was married to Cynthia Bouron, and they died in a murder suicide that many believed that Rooney engineered) to kill Marc and defile and murder his sister.

This was thought to be a lost film, shown only at the San Francisco Film Festival — where Esperanto speakers laughed at how bad the actors spoke — and in France. Between the language and the scandal over Milo killing his girlfriend and himself, the movie was kind of dead. It was found in 2001 when it was reassembled from existing materials.

2022 Scarecrow Psychotronic Challenge Day 12: Codename: Wild Geese (1984)

12. GUERILLAS IN THE MIDST: One involving soldiers or set during a war.

Code Name: Wild Geese is not the sequel to The Wild Geese but don’t let that stop you from watching it and making the filmmaker’s money.

This is directed by an absolute master of the low budget war movie, Antonio Margheriti, written by Michael Lester and produced by a man who made seventeen movies with Jess Franco, Erwin C. Dietrich.

DEA agent Fletcher (Ernest Borgnine) heads an operation to cut off the supply of opium out of Hong Kong. As always with these deep cover government jobs, the money has to come from somewhere. Here, it’s funded by an American businessman named Brenner (Hartmut Neugebauer).

Working with his partner Charlton (Klaus Kinski), Fletcher hires Robin Wesley (Lewis Collins, who is also in Margheriti’s Commando Leopard), a man who has just lost his son to heroin. He’s all for this mission: to burn down heroin operations throughout the Golden Triangle alongside an army of mercenaries like Klein (Manfred Lehmann) and helicopter pilot China (Lee Van Cleef). As you can expect, there are twists, turns and double crosses. Most importantly, it has Mimsy Farmer and a flamethrower mounted on a helicopter.

UNSUNG HORRORS HORROR GIVES BACK 2023: Maniac Driver (2020)

Each October, the Unsung Horrors podcast does a month of themed movies. This year they will once again be setting up a fundraiser to benefit Best Friends, which is working to save the lives of cats and dogs all across America, giving pets second chances and happy homes.

Today’s theme: Japan

I haven’t seen any of Kurando Mitsutake’s movies before this and, well, now I’m looking for more.

The director of Samurai Avenger: The Blind WolfLion-Girl and Gun Woman, in Maniac Driver he’s loudly proclaiming that this is a Japanese giallo.

A taxi driver (Tomoki Kimura) is usually quite normal and even mild until gorgeous women get into his vehicle. Then he loses his mind and is driven to the kind of murderous impulses that get your movie named after animals and filled with black gloves, wearing a motorcycle helmet like the murderer in Strip Nude for Your Killer.

While there are moments of Argento in this and definite tones of Maniac — the poster tagline is “I warned you not to take a taxi tonight” and The New York Ripper — this also draws on the pinky violence genre of its native country.

With a cast of Japanese AV stars (Saryû Usui, Ayumi Kimito, Iori Kogawa, Ai Sayama), a metal soundtrack by the band Aim Higher that makes this feel like the 80s wave of giallo and neon lighting, Maniac Driver is unafraid and unashamed to go there. Is it a giallo? Well, it has the feel of the genre, even if it gives away the killer right away and his reasons — his wife was killed while he was unable to protect her — aren’t discovered by someone else or the police blundering in the dark.

It’s closer to a slasher or Taxi Hunter. That said, I could care less what bucket it has to fit into. It’s fast running time is filled with non-stop violence and sex, a movie that’s ready to be lurid and cheap. And I mean that as a good thing.